Total Mayhem
by Mayhem21
Summary: When Weiss remains missing after the battle with the Elders, Schwartz sets itself up as Kritiker's top assassin team. What mayhem will arise when Weiss finally returns?
1. A Stunning Discovery

**Total Mayhem: Chapter One - A Stunning Discovery **

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Betaed by Silver Rayne_

_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_Author Notes: This story begins two months after the Elders of Esset are defeated. Aya-chan and Sakura are both working in the Koneko and the men of Weiss are presumed dead. _

_Disclaimer: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away._

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Sakura stretched as she and Aya-chan took advantage of a lull in customers at the Koneko. She grinned remembering the horde of schoolgirls that had flocked to the shop when Aya-san and the other boys had worked here. When it became obvious that the boys were not returning, the girls had slowly drifted away, only to be replaced with less energetic, but equally numerous boys.

"Sakura," Aya-chan called over her shoulder, "can you get more pots from the back, please? I have more orders than I know what to do with right now." The younger girl nodded and headed to the back room. As she was pulling down more pots, the door jingled and Aya-chan called out in greeting.

"Irramashe," Aya-chan exclaimed enthusiastically, "can I help you?"

Just as Aya-chan was greeting the new customers, Sakura emerged from the backroom with the pots. She carefully carried them to the table before glancing at the customers. When she looked up, the last pot fell to the floor with a loud crash.

"Oh, so you're working here, are you?" asked one of the new customers. "Heh, didn't think I'd see you again. But, I suppose that if we were to run into each other, this would be the place."

Sakura's face paled gazing at the orange haired man with growing fear. She could barely steady her trembling hands.

"Sakura," Aya-chan's voice suddenly intruded, "do you know them? Introduce us!"

She quickly spun on her heal, her expression dark. "You don't want to know these demons, Aya-chan. These are the men that kidnapped you from the hospital and almost got you killed!"

Aya-chan's eyes widened at this and she turned to face the men once more. Pondering them for a moment, she remembered everything Sakura and the red-haired woman, Manx, had told her about the circumstances surrounding her awakening. Then the alarmed expression slowly transformed into a smile.

"I'm so happy to meet you," she beamed happily, "if it wasn't for you, I don't think I would have been able to wake up!"

The men gawked at her for a moment before the orange haired man burst out laughing. "I suppose that's one way of looking at it." He grinned, "I'm Schuldig, and this lump of white coal is Brad Crawford. Just so you know, he hates his last name. Just call him Brad."

Glaring at Schuldig, Crawford turned towards the blue-haired girl. "Aya-san, I'm pleased to meet you at last…awake, I mean. I must apologize, though, for those unfortunate circumstances."

At these words, Sakura started, quickly growing angry. "Don't listen to them, Aya-chan," she hissed, "Don't forget that they killed your brother!"

"I haven't forgotten," Aya-chan said above a whisper, "but I also haven't forgotten that they suffered too. I doubt they would have acted as they did if it wasn't for the Elders. I won't let their mistakes cloud my perception of them. I'm sure they've grown since then." She paused before grinning ear to ear. "The mark of a truly great doctor is compassion and empathy." The grin turned into a smirk. "And I intend to become great."

At these words, Schuldig laughed again, draping an arm around her shoulders. "Thank you, dear lady, for your kind words," He winked, the playful glint in his blue eyes barely dampened. "I can see why your brother was so obsessed with your well being."

Aya-chan giggled and twirled out from under the German's arm. "Yes, nii-san did tend to go to extremes didn't he?" As she spun, her foot skidded on a puddle of water. A cry of alarm escaped from her lips, arms wind-milling as she began to fall. Before she hit the ground, Crawford dove forward in a timely save and caught her.

"Yow," she cried, "thank you, Brad! Brad?"

Twisting in Crawford's grasp, she looked at him in alarm. "Ahh, Schuldig, I broke Brad-san!"

As Aya-chan's words penetrated his mind, Schuldig's eyes grew wide. Looking at the American precog, he could only stare. The usually cool and collected Crawford had frozen, a wild look on his face. His eyes stared ahead, filled with shock, and nothing the others could do would rouse him.

Finally, before the afternoon rush could arrive, the girls decided to close the Koneko for the day, and quickly pulled down the heavy metal gate. Sakura, still nervous, led the German and stunned American upstairs into the kitchen. She hurriedly filled a kettle with water and put it on the stove to boil. As she darted around the small kitchen, Schuldig concentrated on Crawford, trying to draw him out of his inanimate state.

Despite the telepath's best efforts, the precog remained immobile, his mind whirling around the vision he had had when he caught Aya-chan. A vision that had included Aya-chan in a beautiful wedding dress. When the said girl finally entered the kitchen, her presence registered in his stunned mind and he quickly straightened in his chair.

"Oh, Brad," the gentle girl asked worriedly, "You look like you've seen a ghost! Can I get you anything?"

At this, Crawford gave himself a quick shake, trying to drag his mind back to the present. "I'm quite alright, Miss Fujimiya. A passing thought decided it wanted to take up permanent residence and took a great deal of persuasion to leave."

Schuldig nodded to himself slightly, before sending Crawford a silent question, '_A vision?' _he asked. '_Involving Abyssinian's sister?'_

_'Yes,'_ the American replied, '_it was…'_ Here Oracle paused, trying to shape his confused thoughts. '_It was rather unexpected. I don't want to say too much at the moment, but if Abyssinian's alive that future won't come to pass. He would never let that future take place, even if he had to lock his sister up to prevent it.'_

Schuldig's eyes widened slightly. He couldn't imagine anything that could drive the leader of Weiss to imprison his sister. Whatever Crawford had seen, it must have been a fate worse than what the Elders of Esset had intended.

Sakura watched the men closely, positive that the orange haired demon (as she thought of him) was using his powers to converse with his leader. She shuddered internally, fearful of what the men of Schwarz might be plotting.

'_We're not plotting anything, mädchen,' _the telepath sent, _'nor did we come here with any specific purpose. We were in the area and decided to come by for old time's sake.' _ The telepath paused once more before giving the girl a mischievous grin. _'Or rather, I wanted to come for old time's sake and Crawford agreed just to make me shut up.'_

Sakura leveled a cold stare at the German, refusing to be drawn in. Despite her obvious animosity, the four began to talk, drawing on their shared exposure to Aya-chan's brother as a safe starting point.

Finally, as the clock drifted towards 3:45, Schuldig signaled Brad. "Nagi will be getting out of school soon," he reminded him, then silently added, _'and you know he hasn't fully recovered from that mess with the Elders two months ago.'_

'_Yes,' _the leader of Schwarz replied, '_I remember. You go ahead, there's one last thing I want to do before leaving.'_

The German sized up his leader curiously, but rose obediently. Sakura followed and began to lead him to the back door. Once he was certain that the telepath was out of ear shot, Brad switched his attention to Aya-chan, rose to his feet and bowed politely.

"Miss Fujimiya," he began, "Despite your kind words, our actions two months ago did cause the death of your brother. I know there's nothing I can do to make up for that, but would you allow me to make an effort towards that by joining me for dinner tomorrow night?"

_tbc…_

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**_Edited July 2, 2006: _**

**_Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal._**

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_End notes: This is the first collaboration between Ptath and Lady Raina and we hope you like the story so far. The next chapter will continue things between Aya-chan and Crawford and set the stage for Weiss's not-exactly-triumphant return._

_We would also like any thoughts you have on the story so far, so please hit that little button and let lose! Flames will be given to Farfarello to play with, constructive criticism will be carefully considered and happy reviews will (hopefully) speed up future chapters._


	2. Unexpected Changes

Total Mayhem: Chapter Two – Unexpected Changes 

_By Ptath and Lady Raina_

_Betaed by Silver Rayne_

_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_Author Notes: This chapter continues with Aya-chan and Crawford and begins setting the stage for the return of Weiss._

_Disclaimer: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away._

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Aya-chan hummed under her breath as she sprayed the flowers with water and greens that filled the Koneko. It had been just over a month since Schuldig and Brad Crawford of Schwarz had walked into the Koneko and 1) caused Sakura to break a pot, 2) almost made Aya-chan break a limb falling to the floor, 3) forced them to close early because of the afore mentioned fall, and 4) Crawford had asked her out on a date.

Since that pleasant evening at a wonderful Italian restaurant, she and Crawford has seen two movies, had dinner three times and had gone for long walks in the park five times. Despite Brad's protests, she had never had such a wonderful boyfriend. Even before becoming Kritiker's deadliest assassin, her nii-san's rather intimidating presence had kept most of the boys her age away. Most, but not all.

Even better than seeing Brad come by the shop so often, was that Sakura had stopped dropping pots at the sight of the Schwarz leader. The door jingled suddenly, signaling the entrance of their first customer of the day. Aya-chan happily called out "_Irramashe" _in greeting, eager to start the day.

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Nagi tapped his pen on the desk, his mind focusing not towards the blackboard upon which the teacher was writing, but towards the strange occurrence in the restroom this morning. Their current home had (officially) two bathrooms. In reality, Schuldig claimed one as his own and the rest of Schwarz had to make do with the much smaller and lesser of the two.

When Nagi had finally wrestled breakfast away from a snickering Schuldig and endured Farfarello's attempts to steal his cereal since it apparently 'hurt God', he had fled to the bathroom in hopes of gathering his composure before facing the much saner world. What he had found had made him begin considering walking to the nearest orphanage and declaring himself homeless.

Inside, he found Crawford staring at his reflection in the mirror with a rather critical expression, his face still half covered in shaving cream. He didn't look like he would be moving any time soon. Deciding that he could shower after school, Nagi seized his toothbrush and toothpaste, preferring to risk the labyrinth of Schuldig's bathroom to an oddly behaving Crawford.

A slight frown marred the telekinetic's face when he remembered that Crawford hadn't exactly been himself for a month. Thinking back, he could trace the abnormal behavior to a specific day. The day hadn't been too hot or too cold. It had been as average a day as you could get, and yet when Crawford and Schuldig had returned home (after himself, another oddity), Crawford had seemed even more distant than usual and Schuldig nosy as ever.

Things were even worse the next day. Crawford had been up hours before anyone else (actually, Nagi wasn't even certain he had gone to bed.) Farfarello had found him sitting in the living room with a disturbingly blank expression on his face. The Berserker had taken this as Brad wanting to watch television with him. Ten seconds into _The Teletubbies, _the Schwarz leader had twitched suddenly and fled to his room, where he remained all day, emerging only to use the restroom or grab what Schuldig called 'nervous food.'

Finally, around 5 o'clock, he had surfaced, wearing one of his best suits and looking absolutely petrified. He had left without noticing the stares of his teammates and returned around 9 o'clock…smiling!

Nagi nodded to himself. That was where it had all…gone downhill. Crawford never smiled. The closest he ever came was when he had reduced some pitiful fool to a puddle of quivering goo by means of his Gift. So to see him smiling, humming and practically bouncing in sheer happiness had been startling to say the least. When the strange apparition pretending to be Oracle of Schwarz had disappeared into his bedroom, Nagi and Farfarello had both turned to Schuldig, demanding to know _what had happened the day before_ to make their leader behave this way. And Schuldig had claimed nothing unusual had happened.

The precog's behavior over the following month had been equally strange. Nagi had seen Crawford wearing jeans. Blue, denim jeans! He hadn't even realized that Brad owned jeans. One day he had returned with grass stains covering them. As he recalled that day, he realized that Schuldig had, by then, figuring out what was going on. Or at least thought he had. The German had kept asking the most unexpected questions, from the current weather to whether or not he had picked any blossoms. That question, Nagi remembered, had infuriated their leader. Schuldig had found it to his advantage to lay low since then.

Crawford, he had noticed, had also taken to keeping a vase of flowers on his desk. He had also been seen with his feet propped up on his desk while talking on the phone. And laughing, smiling. Nagi started to wonder if he had missed some debris during the collapse of the Ani Museum. Brain damage was the only thing that could explain his current behavior.

Nagi sighed softly as he turned his attention back to the blackboard. Schuldig knew what was going on. He would question him after school, even if he had to dangle him over Mt. Fuji to talk.

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Nagi used his powers to shoo his school bags into his room before heading for the living room. There, on the couch, sat Schuldig, who was watching Farfarello obsess over _Digimon_. Taking a moment to gather his thoughts, he opened his mouth to speak. "Schuldig, we need to talk."

The German telepath turned towards the kinetic with a lazy glance. "Something on your mind, chibi?"

Nagi glared at Mastermind, doing his best to channel Crawford in a stern mood. "First," he began, "don't call me chibi. Secondly, we need to talk…alone."

At that, the German snorted softly. "Like Farfarello cares what anyone says during this…show. All right, chibi, would the kitchen suit your need for **privacy**?"

"The kitchen would be fine, **Mastermind**," Nagi replied. He turned and walked into the kitchen, ready to drag the German in with him should he decide to be difficult. Fortunately, the German's natural curiosity won over his natural laziness as he rose to follow the fifteen year old.

"All right, **chibi**, what do we need to talk about that's so important? Since you don't want to talk in front of Farfie, dare I assume you have…questions?" As he spoke, the German sneered irritatingly. "I don't suppose it has anything to do with that girl, Tot? The one whose name means **death**?"

Nagi snarled silently, trying to hide the flicker of embarrassment at the mention of his first 'true love', as Schuldig put it. Still trying to channel an irritated Oracle, he straightened as he spoke. "What I want to speak about is Crawford. His behavior as of late has been extremely…erratic. I know you know what's going on. I need you to tell me so we can start planning what to do in case something happens."

At these words, Schuldig felt his eyebrows shoot up. He'd been expecting to talk about something more interesting, not Crawford's love life. "What makes you think I know anything, **chibi**?"

This time, Nagi needed no motivation to glare at the orange haired telepath. He hated it when the German was deliberately obtuse. "You have to know something. You're Mastermind, after all. I know you can't read Crawford's mind, but you can read everyone else's. It's your job to be aware of who and what is happening around Schwarz," here Nagi paused for a moment before continuing. "You also seem to be going out of your way to be even more annoying that usual."

Schuldig looked at Nagi with amusement, before slowly stating, "I don't really know anything chibi, I just happen to have a few guesses," here the German paused, smirking in his most infuriating manner. "Of course, I don't want to damage your virgin ears, so I thi-"

Before he could finish, Schuldig found himself hurled into the wall with an invisible fist. Nagi's eyes glowed with a frightening mixture of power and rage. "Tell. Me. Now!" he punctuated in a deadly tone.

Schuldig nodded as hard as he could before answering. "I can't say if it's male, female, animal or mineral, but I believe," here he paused, his ready grin slipping back onto his face. "I believe our mighty leader is getting laid."

Utter silence answered the telepath's dramatic statement. For a moment, time itself seemed frozen. Schuldig looked at Nagi's stunned expression with amusement, then let out a high pitched yelp as the kinetic's power surged…through the loaded dishwasher.

Schuldig could only stare in shock at the now-flooded kitchen. Broken dishes and cups covered the linoleum floor and counters, and their silverware was imbedded in the walls and cabinets. He shuddered, noting that some of Farfarello's knives had also been in the dishwasher. The damage those knives could have done…He gave himself a quick once-over before turning his attention back to the fifteen-year old.

"Chibi, neh, chibi, you in there?" Schuldig looked at the boy in growing concern. He hadn't moved from his spot in the kitchen, his eyes still filled with shock. Frowning, the German _pushed_ at the other's mind, trying to get his attention.

Nagi started, then looked at Schuldig, his eyes still wide. "You were joking, right?" he begged, "after all, this **is** Crawford we're talking about. Saying he's…he's…" he gulped before starting again. "Saying that Crawford is involved with someone is like saying that Balinese has taken a vow of celibacy." The dazed look faded as he looked around the now-ruined kitchen. "Damn. We'd better clean this up. There's no way we can hide this from Brad, not with his powers. But if we don't try, he's going to be pissed."

Schuldig nodded in agreement. "Very true," he said. "By rights, I should make you clean this up yourself since it **was** your powers that did the damage," he paused here, grinning at Nagi's darkening complexion. "Don't worry, chibi, I know I'm at fault, too. What's say we make this even easier and turn this into a group project?" The German flashed his trademark grin as he leaned out of the kitchen. "Oy, Farfie, get in here and help us clean this up!"

Berserker looked towards the kitchen, then back at the TV. After carefully weighing his options, he rose and walked to the kitchen. If he hurried, he would get back in time for _Iron Chef_. Joining the other Schwarz members, he began to pick up the broken crockery and gather the scattered silverware.

Before they were even a quarter of the way done, however, doom, in the form of Bradley Crawford arrived at the Schwarz house. Unnoticed by the others, he stood in the doorway of the kitchen, a look of utter shock on his face. Schuldig, bent over to gather some of the smaller shards, froze in mid-reach as he spotted a pair of mud-splattered boots. Biting his lip, the telepath slowly brought his eyes up to meet the precog's.

"How-" Crawford stuttered, then began again, "I was only gone for a few hours How the HELL did you manage to DESTROY the KITCHEN in such a short period of time!"

Schuldig's eyes had also gone wide. It almost sounded like…but it couldn't be. Brad **had** to have known that they would destroy the kitchen. The other three Schwarz members had done other stupid things (not on this scale, of course) and he had known about it. So why did he sound so surprised?

Crawford, unaware of Schuldig's whirling thoughts, groaned softly as he pushed his glasses farther up his nose. "It would appear," he began, "that you all have far too much free time on your hands." The precog stopped again, a pained expression flickering across his face. "Since you can't seem to come up with ways to entertain yourself that **don't** involve destroying the house, I think we're going to have to go back to work," then Brad paused once more, a satisfied smile crossing his face. "Starting next Monday, we'll be back on call…with Kritiker."

For the second time in one hour, shock caused Nagi's power to surge wildly. This time, it coursed through the television, which had recently switched to a wildly gesticulating televangelist. Crawford's eyes shut once more as Nagi frantically began to dampen the flames. Without another word, he turned and walked into his room, the door shutting firmly behind him.

Nagi focused on the burning living room before turning to the stunned telepath. "Schu? Why didn't Crawford know we were going to…er…destroy the house?"

Schuldig looked at Crawford's door with worried eyes as he replied, "I don't know, chibi, I don't know."

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**_Edited July 2, 2006:_**

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal. **_


	3. When Things Go Awry

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Three – When Things Go Awry**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_Author Notes: This story begins two months after the Elders of Esset are defeated. Aya-chan and Sakura are both working in the Koneko and the men of Weiss are presumed dead. _

_Disclaimer: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away._

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Crawford sighed as he leaned back in his chair, dropping his pen on the pile of paperwork before him. Despite what Schuldig claimed, he did not enjoy paperwork. As far as he could tell, the only good that came from the bloody stuff was having a legitimate reason to chase Schuldig away when the German came to torment him.

The American glared at the paper-covered desk in front of him. He knew that he would have less work if he didn't insist on running the Koneko like a proper business. With him at the helm, the flower shop was starting to show a profit, but, in a way, that just made his work harder.

He groaned as a particularly tight muscle refused to relax, proof that he had been working far too long. Deciding to take a break, Crawford stood and walked to the window of his office. The office Kritiker had provided above the Koneko had an excellent view of the street and the pedestrians below.

Brushing aside the curtains Aya-chan and Sakura had picked out, he peered down to the street before the flower shop. School was just letting out, and the usual crowd of boys and girls was forming quickly. Despite the shielding against both mental and verbal intrusions, the noise below was audible, as were Schuldig's terrified yelps.

As he was alone, Brad allowed himself to grin at the sound. Schuldig's suffering was the best part of working for Kritiker. And each time the German complained, all Crawford had to do was remind him that their new occupation was solely the telepath's fault.

Crawford shook his head, his slight smile still touching his lips as he remembered that night he'd spoken with Manx about joining Kritiker. He'd expected a row of some sort when he came home, but the mess in the kitchen had given him all the excuse he needed to declare Schwarz's future with no objections.

Crawford sighed softly, knowing he had to return to his work. Turning, he let the curtain fall back into place as he headed back to his desk. Before he could seat himself, however, there was a knock on the door. Oracle smiled to himself. Only one person would dare bother him at this time of the day. He hurried over to the door and opened it for the visitor that stood in the hall.

"I brought some tea, Brad," Aya-chan beamed, "I figured you'd need a break and I'm not due to start work for another hour." Without hesitation, the blue-haired girl slipped past him and walked towards the desk. Brad followed her, picking up papers so she would have a place to land her tray.

Brad took his seat behind the desk once more as Aya-chan busied herself with pouring tea and arranging the small snacks she had brought with her. He smiled to himself as he watched her delicate hands deftly maneuver the large tea pot, then allowed his eyes to drift up her arms to take in her overall appearance. Unlike Sakura, with whom she was good friends, the gentle girl was not wearing a high school uniform. A few weeks after awakening, it seemed that her body had decided to make up for lost time. Whether it was because of the minor adjustments Esset had made to her genetic structure or due to the mysterious force of nature which had held her body agelessly captive in the midst of the coma, her body had…grown up.

Aya-chan was nineteen years old, both chronologically and physically. Only her mind carried echoes of her long sleep, but even those signs were small. Something he was very grateful for. Vision or no vision, Crawford knew that he would never have been able to start going out with Aya-chan if she had still looked sixteen.

Instead of returning to high school, Kritiker had hired Aya-chan a tutor, allowing her to complete high school while simultaneously beginning pre-med classes. Halfway through this tutoring had marked Crawford and Schuldig's visit to the Koneko and the beginning of Aya-chan and Crawford's relationship. They had been dating for just over a month when Nagi and Schuldig had destroyed the kitchen in the former Schwarz home and had been both working and living at the Koneko ever since.

Not long after moving into the suite above the flower shop, Oracle had lived up to his code name and had had a vision of the missing Weiss and Schwarz working together on a mission. Taking this as a sign that Weiss was, in fact, alive, somewhere out there, Kritiker had purchased the building adjacent to the Koneko and had renovated it to accommodate the two teams.

The Koneko proper had twice the room for displays and arrangements, plus a large storage area with a freezer and green room. Kritiker had also kept the garages from each of the original buildings. The large garage was completely filled, holding, as it were, the personal vehicles of Weiss and Schwarz, as well as the Koneko delivery bike and van.

The second floor was now devoted to their day-to-day life, containing the kitchen and dining room, his office, a small library, and the laundry room. The third floor of the Koneko had their bedrooms and the TV and game room. Because of Crawford's vision depicting the eventual return of Weiss, he had ordered the members of Schwarz to spread out so that Weiss would have a higher level of interaction with their former enemies.

The basement, however, was Brad's favorite floor. Not because of the first-aid room (now fully stocked and manned by Aya-chan), not because of the training room, briefing area or the large closet to store their _tools_. No, Brad loved this floor because Kritiker had given them a traditional, full-sized Japanese bath. It was a bit too elaborate for day-to-day use, but was wonderful after missions or on the weekends.

"Here, Brad!" Brad smiled as he accepted the proffered cup. "Manx came by last night, didn't she? I wish I hadn't had class, I was hoping to talk to her. What mission has Kritiker given you this time?"

Brad leaned back in his chair, sipping his tea thoughtfully before answering. "A combination of bodyguard and assassination. Someone's making sure that no Macbeth lives through the last act, quite literally. A famous English Shakespearian troupe has come to town to perform the Scottish Play and Kritiker wants to make sure that this Macbeth lives."

Aya-chan wrinkled her nose. "That's rather odd. Maybe the murderer was hit over the head with a _Macbeth_ script as a child." Here she paused, taking a few sips of her tea. "Have you had any visions about this mission? Is anyone going to get hurt?"

"No," Brad replied, "it's supposed to be pretty straight forward. Get in, kill, and leave. Even Farfarello won't be too excited."

"That's good," Aya-chan said, then started as she looked at her watch. "I'd better go save Schuldig from the fangirls." Gathering the remnants of their snack, she picked up the tray and headed for the door. "Be careful when you go out tonight. I hate having to put you all back together again." With that she left, tossing a grin over her shoulder. Crawford nodded before looking down at his desk. With a sigh, he got back to work.

* * *

"Are we there yet?" Schuldig whined. Brad closed his eyes, feeling the beginnings of a headache behind his eyes. Pushing his glasses back up his face, he turned to face the telepath.

"Schuldig, in case you hadn't noticed, we're **in the bloody theatre!**"

Schuldig merely grinned. "I know that. You just looked so far away," he smirked. "Thinking of dear lil' Aya-chan?"

"Schuldig, one more word and I shoot you. And who do you think Kritiker will believe when it goes into the mission report?"

Pouting slightly, the German shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants and turned to sulk in the shadows. 'Stupid Oracle,' he thought, 'he gets himself a cute girlfriend and suddenly he rules the world.' Even as the thought crossed his mind, he started. 'What am I thinking? Che, I need to get laid.'

"Mastermind, stop sulking and pay attention. The targets are here, now get moving," Crawford suddenly hissed.

Nagi looked over at the telepath with a level gaze. First Crawford starts acting lovey-dovey, then Schuldig doesn't notice a mind approaching with malevolent intent. He sighed silently. It was rather sad that he and Farfarello were the only sane members of Schwarz left. Out of the corner of his eye, the kinetic could see Berserker moving into position. 'Time to get to work,' he thought.

* * *

"Well, that was easy," Schuldig said as he looked down at the bodies lying on the stage. "Can we go home now? I'm hungry and I'm tired and if we don't leave soon, I swear I'll start whining."

"You mean you haven't started yet?" complained Nagi.

"Enough!" Crawford snapped. This was one of the worst missions he'd ever gone on, and that was saying something. The kill itself had been easy, but he'd had to put up with a whining Schuldig, a sarcastic Nagi and Farfarello…well, the Irish madman was never easy to deal with after sunset. Shaking his head, he turned to leave…only to realize he'd stepped onto thin air.

Farfarello watched silently as Oracle of Schwarz disappeared off the stage into the orchestra pit, an extremely startled expression on his face. Schuldig and Nagi were still arguing, so he decided that it was up to him to rescue his stunned leader. He walked to the edge of the stage and peered down into the darkness below. Squinting his one eye, he could make out Crawford's white suit, sprawled on the floor below.

Berserker continued to study his fallen leader silently. Schuldig, suddenly noticing the amusement pouring off Farfarello, turned around to look at the still figure. "Something amusing down there?" he asked.

"Yes," Berserker said, laughter filling his voice. "Brad," he mocked, "seems to be considering a career in music."

Schuldig blinked. Not only was that statement rather clever, it made no sense when applied to Crawford. He and Nagi walked up to Farfarello and looked down. "Oh," Schuldig said.

Crawford glared up at them, trying to ignore the pain shooting through him when ever he moved. "Schuldig," he roared, then winced. "Schuldig, stop snickering and get me out of here!"

* * *

"You wanted to talk to me, Manx?" Aya-chan asked into her cell phone. She had just gotten out of a rather late class when the red-haired woman called.

"Yes," Manx said. "I have some rather…well, I suppose it's bad, but…" Here she paused, her amusement evident in her voice. "Schwarz completed their mission with no problems, but somehow, Crawford…" Manx stopped again to suppress a laugh. "Crawford fell into the orchestra pit after they finished the mission. He's not too badly hurt, but he will be out of commission for a while."

Aya-chan blinked, pulling the phone away from her ear for a moment, staring at it in surprise. Bringing it back to her ear, she replied, "How did he manage that?" She sighed, shaking her head silently. "How badly was he hurt?"

"Just a few bruises, some rather large splinters and a badly sprained wrist. I'm afraid his suit didn't survive, though. Oh, he also has a few broken ribs, but those will heal faster than his wrist."

Aya-chan nodded thoughtfully. That didn't sound too bad. Goodness knows the others had been hurt worse on other missions. "Manx," she said after a moment. "I know my nii-san will hate this, but I think I should join Kritiker. Someone needs to keep these boys in one piece."

On the other end, Manx's eyes widened. This…was not something that had occurred to her before. "I suppose that would make things easier. But you'd only serve on a medical basis. Your brother will kill me if you get hurt."

"I think I'd prefer that, actually," Aya-chan replied. "But nii-san won't have to worry too much. Brad's teaching me how to use a gun, just in case. Are there any other conditions?"

"You'll probably be on call to assist other Kritiker teams when needed, but I'll make sure you're primary focus is Schwarz, and Weiss if they ever turn up. I'll bring the necessary forms by tomorrow," Manx said as she hung up the phone.

* * *

Brad grimaced as he shifted his weight slightly. He hated having broken ribs. He pressed a hand against his aching sides as he resettled himself on his bed. What he hated even more than broken ribs was not being aware that he was going to have them. 'And that,' he though, 'is the real problem. I should have seen this coming. Every other time I've been injured, I at least had some warning.'

He groaned again as his door opened. "Go away, Schuldig," he growled.

"That's a new one," an amused voice answered.

Brad's eyes shot open at the distinctly female voice. Suddenly, his ribs didn't hurt as much. Smiling gently, Aya-chan walked into the room, closing the door behind her. "Manx called me after class and told me what happened," she said. "And I will now be getting paid for taking care of you," she added with a grin.

"What!" Brad yelped, his face going white at both the news and the pain that shot through him as he yelled.

"Brad, don't do that!" Aya-chan scolded. "You'll only make it worse. While I don't mind looking after you, I'd prefer it if you didn't have broken ribs while I was doing so."

"Never mind my damned ribs," Brad growled. "What did you mean that you're going to be getting paid for taking care of me…I mean us."

"Manx and I agreed that since I'm already taking care of Schwarz, and since I know all about your missions, that I might as well join Kritiker." She paused for a moment before continuing, raising her voice slightly to be heard over Brad's sputters. "I'm going to be a doctor anyway, so I might as well get some practice." Sighing softly, she gave Crawford a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, I won't be going on any missions. My job is to look after you and the rest of Schwarz. I'll also be on call to help patch up other Kritiker teams in the area. That's it."

Crawford stared at her, before sighing. He knew when he was beat. 'Oh well,' he thought. 'At least I can tell Abyssinian that I tried to keep his sister out of Kritiker.' He looked at Aya-chan thoughtfully for a moment before speaking. "Aya-chan, in my dresser, there's a small black box, can you get it for me?" Aya-chan looked at him, her eyes widening slightly before she did as he asked. Pulling out the box, she turned back to the bed and gave it to Crawford.

Clearing his throat, Crawford looked at the young girl. "Aya-chan, there's something I wanted to ask you…"

* * *

**_Edited July 3, 2006: _**

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

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**_

_Big thanks to Brick, chaotic Intrests, RuByMoOn17, Elisabeth, ebon mistress, Loki Flamewing, Lauren, and Nobody for your great reviews! The next chapter will have the return of Weiss…and a big surprise!_

_We would also like any further thoughts you have on the story so far, so please hit that little button and let lose! Flames will be given to Farfarello to play with, constructive criticism will be carefully considered and happy reviews will speed up future chapters._


	4. Trouble 101

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Four – Trouble 101**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_Disclaimer: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

_Author Notes: We know the past three chapters have gone by really quick looks sheepish, so here do we, the authors, present a timeline of the story so far:_

_Chapter 1: The story starts 2 months after the fall of the Elders of Esset. This chapter covers one day at the Koneko, in which Brad and Aya-chan begin going out._

_Chapter 2: This chapter starts one month into Aya-chan and Brad's relationship. Nagi and Schuldig wreck the kitchen in the Schwarz safehouse and begin working for Kritiker._

_Chapter 3: In this chapter, we get a clearer overview of the timeline. Chapter 2 takes place three months after the fall of Esset. Three more months have passed at the beginning of chapter 3. Weiss has been missing for 6 months and Aya-chan has begun med school._

_Chapter 4: This chapter begins two months after chapter 3 (basically, Brad needed time to heal). Can't say anymore without giving things away, but it's been eight months now._

_

* * *

_

Manx stretched slightly as she walked to a nearby bakery to pick up some lunch. After purchasing a sandwich, she settled down on a park bench outside to enjoy a much needed break. A sudden jingle jolted her out of her thoughts.

'_Not another call,_' she thought as she dug her cell phone out of her purse. "Hello?" Her eyes went wide when she heard the voice on the other side. "It's you!"

* * *

Manx looked around anxiously, searching for a specific face. Her face brightened when she heard a voice called her name. 

"Manx-san," Omi called. "It's wonderful to see you again!"

"And you, Omi," she said, pausing a moment before continuing. "It's been eight months since you defeated the Elders of Esset. Where have you been all this time?"

Omi looked at her a moment, turning slightly to glance over at the other members of Weiss, who were clustered under a nearby tree. Yohji was rolling an unlit cigarette between his fingers, occasionally casting a glance at the others. Ken was watching a nearby soccer match, mournful that he couldn't join in. The past eight months had forced the goalie's obsession to remained unfed…with noticeable effects. Aya was seated on the ground, his legs drawn up and his head down. His usually solemn face was drawn and grim. Omi turned back, facing Manx once more.

"It took a while to get everyone together. I'm pretty sure that Prodigy of Schwarz is the reason we're alive, but we were pretty battered. None of us escaped without bruises and broken bones. We ended up in different hospitals, but I managed to get everyone transferred to one place after two months in the hospital. Ken, Yohji and I were released a month later." Omi paused for a moment, than grinned. "Aya-kun walked out a month later. The nurses and doctors had a fit, but luckily he was just being kept for observation."

Manx frowned as she listened to Bombay's report. "That's only four months," she said, "and you were all healthy by then. How did it take you four more months to get back to Tokyo?"

Omi looked back at the other members of Weiss. Aya's eyes were closed, his head now resting on his knees. "Aya-kun is why it took so long. Physically, he could have been released when we were but…" he paused again, struggling to describe what he remembered. "Aya-kun got…wild…he had such extreme mood changes that the doctors were almost frightened. And he just kept getting worse. Finally, he just got up and left. For a while he seemed to be getting better…but suddenly he was getting horrible headaches, migraines, ones so bad he literally couldn't walk."

Omi sighed as he remembered the past few months. "That's what took so long," he said softly. "There would be days that we couldn't do anything because Aya-kun was in so much pain. He seemed to do a little better when all of us where there, so we just decided to take our time, hoping he would get better."

Manx frowned again as she heard Omi's explanation. "I guess we can have the Kritiker doctors take a look at him, but if the other doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong…" Manx sighed, scrubbing her face with the back of her hand. "We'll worry about it later. Since you called, may I assume you're willing to return to Kritiker, as Weiss?"

Omi nodded. "We talked it over. When you consider that before the events with the Elders, Ken-kun, Yohji-kun and Aya-kun were all considered legally dead…" he shrugged. "We don't have that many skills, so we might as well do something we're good at."

Manx nodded crisply. Now they were getting on more familiar territory. "Can you call the others over? Kritiker will be happy to have you back, but there have been a few changes."

Omi nodded and hailed the others. Yohji brightened, putting on his best smile as he headed for Manx. Ken cast one last look at the soccer game before extended a hand to Aya. Aya remained still for a moment before raising his head, his face blank. Accepting Ken's hand, he let the other haul him to his feet.

Manx gave the rest of Weiss a crisp nod then began to speak. "Kritiker is happy to have you back, men of Weiss," she began. "There have been a few changes, but as professionals, I'm sure you'll be able to work everything out." She paused, looking carefully at the assassins before her. "During your absence, a new team joined Kritiker. They've functioned as both assassins and bodyguards and have been running the Koneko in your absence."

Yohji smiled, "Well, if you think we can work with them, then I see no problem." He cleared his throat and pushed his sunglasses back up his nose. "Now then, perhaps we can talk about a more pressing issue, fair lady. Would-"

"So you're finally back," a voice suddenly asked…a very familiar voice, actually. Manx winced as the assassins froze for a moment before turning around to look at the figures behind them.

"Took you long enough!" Schuldig called as he stuck his head out from behind Crawford's form.

Yohji froze, Ken's mouth fell open, Omi looked ready to faint and Aya…well, the last time Manx had seen him this upset was when Takatori had gotten away from him.

Deciding to act before blood was shed, Manx stepped between the men and began the introductions. "Weiss," she began, "Schwarz began working for Kritiker six months ago. We have had no problems with them and we expect that to continue when you begin working with them." The red haired woman narrowed her eyes, silently reminding them of the consequences of disobeying the organization they'd sold their souls to.

Ken stared at her in disbelief. "You can't be serious, Manx!" he exclaimed. "Last time we saw Schwarz, they tried to kill us!"

"Believe it or not, Siberian, but we had no intention of killing you. Schwarz's goal has been the same for past few years: to free ourselves from Esset." Ignoring the disbelieving looks, Brad continued. "The Elders may have lead Esset but they were not the only danger. The only way to remain free was to give Esset reason to believe that we had died. Fighting you gave us that excuse. Our allegiance with Kritiker has also increased our chances of remaining free."

"Yeah," Schuldig said, a grin spreading across his face, "Now that we don't have to try and kill each other, think of how…close we can get," he finished and draped an arm across Aya's shoulders…and froze as Aya glared at him. Backing away, his eyes wild, Schuldig reached out for Oracle's familiar mind.

'_Brad?_' he silently begged. '_Brad? This is important…_'

Oracle's eyes flickered over to the German before he replied. _'Schuldig, now is **not** a good time_.'

'_Yeah, well, if I waited to tell you, you'd be mad.'_

Brad resisted the urge to close his eyes, knowing he needed to focus on preventing bloodshed. Fortunately, Manx seemed to have Weiss in hand. After a great deal of arguing, they had agreed to try and work with Schwarz and were ready to head back to the Koneko.

'_Go ahead, Schu,' _Brad finally sent.

'_Um, I think I just did something bad…_' he began.

Crawford gritted his jaw. He felt like he was pulling teeth. _'Spit it out, Mastermind,_' he snapped, _'it'll just get worse the longer you put off telling me what's going on_.'

'_Well…I think I know why Aby…Aya's been having such bad headaches and stuff.'_ The German paused, trying to work out the best way to tell his leader what he'd done. _'You remember that after we first met Weiss, I told you I couldn't read Abyssinian's mind? Well…turns out that he's…he's a latent telepath.'_

Brad felt his mind freeze. This…was not starting out well. Aya's apparent telepathy and Schuldig's claim that he'd "done something"…shouldn't he have had a vision? If Schuldig thought he'd done a bad thing, then the only possible outcome was chaos, possibly bloodshed, and who knows what else. _'Alright, and what does Fujimiya's telepathic abilities have to do with...what ever it is you've done?'_

'_Well, like I said, he's a latent telepath. He's suppressed his abilities all his life. Somehow, his mental shields have been failing and…'_ he hesitated again. _'I think I somehow…broke them completely…when I touched him. I'm shielding his mind for now, but I can't do it forever.'_

Brad groaned softly, waving away Ken's concerned look as he pinched the bridge of his nose. They were supposed to be earning Weiss's trust, not finding reasons to lose it. Explaining this…was not going to be fun.

* * *

_Big thanks to everyone who reviewed. If you're confused about anything (and we mean anything), just drop a review and we'll explain in the author notes of the next chapter. Overall, though, please review! The more reviews we get, the more we're motivated to keep working on the story! We've worked out what the next few chapters are going to be, but we need your support to continue!_

_The next chapter, ah what fun we have had in planning out the next chapter! Weiss and Schwarz must learn to live together before they can work together. And what of Aya's telepathy? Oh, what fun!_


	5. Please Tell Me You're Joking

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Five – Please Tell Me You're Joking**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_  
_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

_**Author notes**: Just to reiterate, Aya/Ran will be called Aya throughout the story and Aya-chan will remain Aya-chan. Also, in this chapter, you, Reader, will be told a great deal about the newly renovated Koneko. Lady Raina, Silver Rayne, and I (Ptath) put our heads together and actually drew up a floor plan for the Koneko. If you like, the link is below if you want to see what we're talking about._

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

Aya rubbed his temples silently, feeling mildly grateful that the migraine he'd felt building in the park was no where near as bad as he'd thought it would be. He just hoped the drive to the Koneko wouldn't take too long. The sooner he got to bed the better. 

Yohji was driving the assassins of Weiss, with Omi beside him in the passenger's seat. Ken, tucked away in the backseat with Aya, was looking out the window, his pleasure at being back in Tokyo evident on his face

"Almost there," Yohji called suddenly.

"I wonder what the Koneko looks like now," Omi wondered. "Manx said that Kritiker has remodeled it to accommodate two teams." Bombay also wondered if they'd kept the old computer. He'd be the first to beg for a new system, but there was some data on the old one that would be hard to replace…

"I just hope they haven't tossed our stuff out!" Ken exclaimed. "I hate breaking in new cleats…and my soccer gear…"

Yohji laughed. "Ken-ken, your stuff is definitely safe. I don't think there's enough money in the world to get someone to clean out your room." Ken pouted slightly. His room wasn't **that** bad. Besides, to remodel the Koneko, their rooms **had **to have been cleaned out. Grinning silently, he decided to give that thought voice.

Yohji's face paled. He hadn't thought of that…_'Please, please, please_,' he silently begged, '_tell me Manx didn't see our stuff. She barely tolerates me as it is…_'

Aya glanced at their driver, his headache forgotten when he saw the slightly panicked look on Kudoh's face. Personally, he didn't care if anyone had touched his things. The remodeling probably meant that Aya-chan had found the boxes in the back of his closet, the ones he'd filled with the few items he had retrieved from the remains of their home, the presents he gotten her for each missed birthday…

Omi's phone rang. Blinking in surprise, he opened the small device. "Moshi-moshi," he said. "Oh, Manx…yes, we're driving to the back…two garages? … the one of the left …yes, that sounds fine. Let me tell Yohji real quick…Yohji, we're to park just outside the garage…what was that, Manx? … You did? That's great! ...Alright, we'll see you there."

Turning in his seat, Omi grinned at the men in the backseat. "Good news," he beamed. "Yohji and Aya's cars, as well as our bikes, Ken, are safe at the Koneko! Manx said she'd turn in the rental for us, as well."

Ken grinned. "Sounds good! I can't wait to take my bike out!"

"You'll get your chance, Ken-ken," Yohji laughed, "just don't expect any of us to go with you. And you call me a reckless driver?" Yohji laughed again at the way Ken's face darkened. "Now now, Ken-ken, none of that. Surely you don't want to give our new teammates the wrong impression?"

With those words, Yohji pulled up to the garage. After turning off the car and climbing out, Yohji tossed the keys to Manx, flashing his most charming grin.

Manx gave him a 'you-haven't-got-a-chance' look before walking into the garage, past the cars and up the stairs tucked between the garages. Beyond the stairs, they could see Yohji's Super Seven, Schuldig's red Mustang Saleen Specialty, three motorbikes and the delivery van. Yohji cast a fond look at the green car before heading up the stairs after the Kritiker agent.

Manx stepped off onto the second floor and motioned for Yohji and the others to continue upwards. "The third floor has the bedrooms and a tv room. We put your things in a room each, but feel free to trade." Turning away, she headed for the kitchen. "Korat," she called, "I need to talk to you in the mission room."

"Of course, Manx," a female voice replied. "Just let me put a few more things away…" Aya, who had been bringing up the rear, froze with his foot above the next step. He stepped out onto the second floor just as his sister walked out of the kitchen with Manx. His chest felt tight. To see her walking, talking again, was almost too much.

"Nii-san!" Aya-chan cried when she saw her brother. "It's wonderful to see you!" Rushing over, she flung her arms around his neck and gave him a fierce hug before pulling away. "I want to hear everything about where you've been" she said, "but it'll have to wait a few hours. Why don't you help me make dinner? Manx said that when you cooked for the rest of Weiss, Yohji would cancel his date and Ken would skip soccer practice. I think that making dinner together would be a great way for you and the others to get to know each other. What do you say, please?" Aya-chan clasped her hands under her chin, giving her brother her best 'puppy-dog eyes' look.

Aya smiled slightly. She didn't need to give him that look to make him agree. Besides, it wasn't anywhere near Omi's level. "Of course," he said, before narrowing his eyes. "Manx said she needed to talk to you…in the mission room?"

Aya-chan suppressed a gulp before grinning in reply. "Yup!" she exclaimed. "Don't worry, Brad can explain everything, can't you, Brad" she asked, turning to the American.

Said American's heart dropped to his feet when Abyssinian's murderous gaze fell upon him. Before either could say anything, the two women slipped past them both and disappeared downstairs.

Crawford cleared his throat, silently cursing the girl for putting him in this situation, cursing Manx for giving her a mission, cursing Schuldig for unlocking Aya's telepathy, and cursing the world in general for conspiring against him.

"I tried to keep her out of Kritiker," he stated swiftly. "She lived and worked at the Koneko but that was it. She knew what was going on, but didn't push the issue until two months ago. She asked to join Kritiker because she felt she was already working as a member and might as well get paid for it." Crawford cringed slightly when Aya's glare didn't abate. "She doesn't have missions," he added, "not like ours, I mean. She works on a medical basis only. She puts us back together and any other Kritiker teams in the area that need a doctor. That's it, I swear."

Aya exhaled slowly and shut his eyes. Weiss returns to Tokyo and is told that they would now be working with Schwarz. The Koneko had been completely remodeled. His sister was awake and working for Kritiker. She'd been living **with Schwarz** and on top of all that, his head still hurt and the day wasn't even half over. Groaning, the red-head rubbed his temples once more and pushed past Oracle towards the stairs. He wanted to find out which room was his and go to sleep.

Crawford watched the red-head climb the stairs. He looked angry, tired and in pain. '_Why me?' _Oracle wondered. '_Why am I always the one who has to put everything back together?_'

'_Because you're good at it?' _Schuldig interjected.

Crawford's eyes narrowed. '_You're the one who got us into this mess. And don't think for a minute that you're not going to be the one to tell Abyssinian what you did. I'm just going to be there to pull him off of you once you've passed out.'_

'_I knew you loved me…'_ Schuldig muttered. He looked at his new teammates, watching as they explored their new living quarters. There were four master bedrooms in each corner, belonging to Aya-chan, Brad, Farfarello and Aya respectively, with four more filling the space between (two along each wall). Nagi and Omi had the rooms between Aya-chan and Brad's rooms and Yohji and Schuldig were between Aya and Farfarello. There were two more bedrooms in the middle of the third floor. One was Ken's and the other a spare (usually used by Sakura). Between Aya-chan and Farfarello's rooms was a space too small (even by Tokyo standards) to be a bedroom. So they'd turned it into a TV room.

Schuldig's shoulders twitched as he heard footsteps on the stairs. Straightening from where he was slouched on the wall, he waited for the leader of Weiss to appear. Trying not to fidget, the German did his best not to think about what was about to happen. Crawford had made it very clear that he was not going to interfere with the upcoming events until Schu's life was on the line.

'_Well_,' he thought, '_at least I know it'll be over quick._' He cast a nervous look at the new telepath's room. '_Wish I'd had time to clean it up_.'

Aya felt his eyes narrow when he reached the top of the stairs and saw the German. "Unless you have something to say," he growled, "move."

Schuldig tried to grin, only to fail miserably at the sight of the other's expression. "Well, actually, I do. But I think Brad can explain much better than me."

"Schuldig!" Crawford roared as he came up behind Aya. "We've been over this. You caused the problem and you get to explain it!"

Aya was now glaring at both of them. "If it's **another** surprise, I think it can wait until **after** I've gotten some sleep," he growled. "Which room is mine?"

Crawford sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I suppose it could wait a few more hours," He muttered. "You have the room Schuldig is leaning against. It's one of four master bedrooms."

Aya nodded silently and pushed past the members of Schwarz. Opening the door to his room, he started to walk in and froze. Schuldig cringed. Crawford looked confused (he'd felt like this for almost an hour already and was **not **enjoying the sensation). Slowly, Abyssinian turned around, murder in his eyes.

Schuldig gulped and dove for the stairs. Crawford lunged and caught the back of his jacket, half choking the German in the process.

"Whatever **else** you've done, you get to pay for it. Now move!"

Schuldig whimpered as his leader pushed him towards the homicidal redhead. '_Oh look,_' he thought, '_it's meine Schwester! Und Mutter…und Vater! Hallo! Ein moment, bitte… Rosenkruez? What's Aya doing here? Hmm. Oh well. Noooooo, my life is flashing before my eyes!'_

Heedless of the German's petrified expression, Aya seized his shirt and swung him towards the bedroom. "What. Is. This. Mess. Doing in **my** room!**"**

Schuldig simply whimpered.

Crawford could feel his head getting tight, a sure sign of an impending headache. "What's he done now," he groaned, then walked up to look over the red-head's shoulder.

"Schuldig," Crawford stated after a moment. "You must enjoy living dangerously." The room before them was a mess. Clothes, books, music and papers of all shapes and sizes were scattered around the Weiss leader's room.

Schuldig squirmed as best he could considering the headlock Abyssinian had him in. "Kritiker is cheap," he began. "And would only shield six rooms: the four master bedrooms, Crawford's office and the infirmary. And any room I stay in is a mess. If I'd had a few more hours warning, I would have cleaned up."

Crawford and Aya wore identical expressions of disbelief. Aya released Schuldig and turned, intending to use the German's room for a nap while his was cleaned up. Crawford's face turned grim as he caught the red-head by the shoulder.

"There is actually one more matter to discuss, I'm afraid," he said as he pushed Schu into Aya's room. The owner of said room sighed, a defeated look on his face, turned and walked into the bedroom.

Crawford pulled the door shut as they all settled in the room, shoveling debris away as they did so. A sudden vision depicting a bloody Schuldig and a broken umbrella prompted a slight change of plans.

'_Schuldig_,' Oracle sent, '_you're in enough trouble. Sit down, shut up and try to look apologetic_.'

Deciding that a build up would just make things worse, Crawford instead took the bull by the horns:

"Aya, we know why you've been having headaches. You're a telepath."

…

"Please tell me you're joking."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Well, ladies and gents, that's it for this chapter. To see our rough sketch of the Koneko (hope you can read it), go here (remove the spaces):_

_www . imagestation . com / album / pictures . html ? id 2127248889 & idx 1_

Schus Soft Insanity: We're so glad you like Schu! Personally, Ptath thinks he's pretty fun to write. And it's just going to get better.

Vera-Sama: We think Brad/Aya-chan is fun, under the right circumstances. We have a few more twists coming that we hope you'll enjoy!

Kentatsu: We're having so much fun with Aya's telepathy. And just remember this…everything comes in threes…and Brad and Aya-chan are a big part of it!

Hkokuryuha: We're happy that you've been reading and even happier that you decided to review! Lady Raina came up with the orchestra pit. We needed Brad to be injured somehow, and, well…we're glad you liked it!

_To all our other readers, thank you and we hope you enjoy! Reviews do encourage our writing, so drop us a line. A simple 'nice' works._

_The next chapter (maybe chapters, we don't know how long it'll actually be, even though we know what's going to happen **very** far in advance) has Weiss and Schwarz learning to work together in the Koneko. _

/(Aya aggravation factor over the next chapters.)


	6. Tempting Murphy

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Six – Tempting Murphy**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_  
_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

_**Author notes**: This chapter and the ones that follow are part of a mini-arc: Aya's Week of Hell. **Read the endnotes! Important information contained within!**_

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

Schuldig carefully gathered another armload of clothes, trying not to wake the sleeping red-head. The room was beginning to actually look like a room and less like a war zone. Leaning against the closed door was Crawford, carefully supervising the clean-up.

Crawford shook his head silently, marveling at the German's audacity. He **still **couldn't believe that Schuldig had moved into Aya's room.'_You do realize how lucky you are to still be alive,_' he sent.

Schuldig made a face at the precog before responding. '_Yeah, well, just wait a few hours,_' Schuldig responded. '_I'm sure he'll more than make up for it_ _after he gets some sleep_.'

* * *

Aya rolled onto his side, feeling more at peace than he had for years. His head didn't hurt and he knew he was finally home. He made no effort to stir from his dreamy reverie, sensing in the back of his mind that this peace would not last long. And sure enough, a large crash suddenly split the air.

"Ken!" a young voice yelled. "Aya's resting, so stop playing with your soccer ball in the house!"

"Hai, hai, Omi," Ken answered and retreated downstairs.

Aya rolled onto his back, draping an arm over his eyes. A few minutes later, the bed suddenly dipped as someone sat down next to him. "Aya-chan's back. She wants to know if you're still up for making dinner."

Aya suppressed a growl. Schuldig. Funny how the German word for 'guilty', when applied to a person, could be seen as the cause of every problem in his life. Well, most of them.

Aya did growl when he felt a hand brush his hair. Raising his arm, he opened his eyes to glare at the telepath sitting beside him. The German merely smirked and rose from the bed. "I can shield you for a few more hours before we have to start working on your shields." With those words, Mastermind walked out of the room.

Aya growled yet again before slowly sitting up, pleased when his head didn't start throbbing. Grabbing a fresh pair of clothes, he quickly showered before heading downstairs to help his sister make dinner.

* * *

Yohji hovered outside the kitchen, his mouth watering. He'd considered going out for a few hours, but once he heard that both the Fujimiya siblings would be cooking…well, he certainly wasn't going to pass up such a feast. He knew that Aya could probably set up his own restaurant if he ever got tired of being an assassin/florist and if Aya-chan was even half as good…

"Yohji," Aya-chan suddenly called. "Could you put these on the table, please?"

Yohji carefully took the dishes and silverware from the young woman's arms and gave her a cheerful grin. "Of course, my precious," he replied with a cheery wink.

Aya-chan giggled before slipping back into the kitchen. Yohji walked over to the dining room and began to set out the plates, cups, and other things. He turned around and screamed when he found Aya looming behind him.

"You will not flirt with my sister, you will not take her out and you will not treat her like she is one of your dates. She is my sister and you will act accordingly. If you do not, I will ensure that you will have no reason to go out at night any more, is that understood?"

Yohji gulped. He'd thought Aya in a Takatori rage was scary. Aya in 'Over-Protective Big Brother' mode was worse. "The thought never crossed my mind," he swore.

Aya gave him a hard look before turning and walking back to the kitchen. As soon as the door swung shut behind him, Yohji collapsed into the nearest chair. Well, at least they knew that Aya was starting to feel better.

* * *

Omi beamed at the newly assembled team. They were seated around a large table in their new dining room. There was one smaller table on the other side of the dining room to use for less formal meals. Crawford, unsurprisingly, was seated at the head of the table, looking like a benevolent father watching over his children. Aya-chan was at the other end, her brother on one side of her and Nagi on the other.

As the food made its way around the table, Omi noticed that Schuldig seemed a bit subdued and that, every so often, his eyes would flick nervously to Aya. Despite the twitchy German next to him, Aya appeared as composed as ever.

As the meal finally wound down and the dishes had been cleared away, Crawford cleared his throat and held up a slip of paper he'd pulled from a pocket somewhere. "The Koneko will open tomorrow. I assume you wish to know when you'll be working?" he asked.

Yohji leaned back in his chair wearing a lofty expression. "By all means, dear leader," he said, gesturing for Oracle to continue. "Your loyal minions await your orders with baited breath."

Crawford glared. The headache that had built up earlier was beginning to return. "The Koneko will open at 7 a. m. and close at 7 p. m., like it always has. There are three shifts: 7-11, a one hour lunch break, then the 12-4 shift, followed by the 4-7 shift. The schedule is, of course, different for the weekdays, but this should suffice for Saturdays. Aya-chan, you and Omi will work the first shift. Yohji will work with Sakura, and Nagi and Ken have the last shift. Any questions?"

The legs of Yohji's chair hit the ground. "I have several, actually," he said, trying to keep his tone pleasant. "One: why is Sakura working at the Koneko? Two: why do I have to work with her? Three: why aren't Schuldig and Aya scheduled to work? I don't know about the German, but Aya is the best of us when it comes to being a florist."

Crawford scowled. He'd spent how many years putting up with Schuldig and now there were two of them. "Schuldig and Aya will be working on building up Aya's mental shields so your inane thoughts don't drive him insane. I'm assuming you don't want to deal with an unstable Aya."

He paused, taking in the startled looks around the table. "As for Sakura," he said, "she has worked at the Koneko since the trouble with the Elders of Esset. You could work the morning shift instead, if you'd like."

Yohji's reply was short. "I do **not** get up before 11."

"Fine, you work with Sakura," Brad replied, then added "you could probably learn a great deal from her if you put your mind to it."

"Yohji," Omi pleaded suddenly, turning up the 'puppy-dog eyes,' "please stop arguing. I want to know what Crawford meant about Aya needing to build up mental shields."

"Simple," Crawford said. "Aya is a telepath. His abilities began to surface recently and Schuldig accidentally unlocked them."

Ken blinked. He'd been unusually silent during the meal, sitting as he was next to Farfarello. He turned Crawford's statement over a few times in his head. Aya being a telepath would certainly explain why he'd been having so many migraines lately. He shuddered internally, wondering what it must have been like to hear everyone's thoughts and be unable to turn them off.

'_It's awful,_' Schuldig suddenly sent, his mental voice echoing in Ken's mind. '_It's just noise, noise, noise, noise that won't go away no matter what you do. Shields keep the worst of it away and the physical shielding Kritiker provided helps too, but it never goes away._'

Ken blinked, trying to process the telepath's words. He hoped Aya would be able to learn soon.

* * *

Ken bounded into the Koneko at 4 o'clock on the dot. He'd had an emotional reunion with his kiddie soccer team and was ready to take on the world! Yohji was standing in front of the register, glaring at it with such venom that it almost qualified as one of Aya's 'shi-ne glares.'

"Did the register do something to you, Yohji?"

Yohji's head snapped up. "This cursed **thing** has been acting up all day. Not only that, but one of the vases started leaking, something we didn't discover until I stepped in the resulting puddle, carrying an arrangement Sakura had **just finished**. I managed to remain relatively upright, but the arrangement was ruined. And when she started to work on the replacement, she was **gored** by a thorn we **both **missed. And this bloody thing still won't open!"

"…oh."

Yohji gave the register one last glare before stalking towards the backroom. Ken stared at his retreating back as he tied on his own apron. He walked over to the register, murmuring soothing words to the abused machine. When he moved to open it, it did so with no complaints.

Nagi, having witnessed the whole scene, stared, flabbergasted, at Ken. Ken grinned at his stunned expression. "Yohji's mean to it, so it's mean to him," he said. He picked up an order and walked towards the table to start work…and stepped directly in a puddle. Nagi, who'd been bent over another order noticed too late to stop the falling Siberian, and could only watch in horror as the goalie hit the ground with a large thud.

Ken could only whimper. Why did they have to have concrete floors? Before he could move, he felt himself being pulled gently to his feet by an unseen force. He took a deep breath as his feet settled under him and whimpered at the pain in his rear end.

"We should mop that up," he mumbled. Nagi could only nod. As Ken started the arrangement, he suddenly realized that he hadn't actually heard Nagi speak yet…

They'd just gotten the puddle cleaned up when Farfarello suddenly wandered into the room. "Crawford said that if I didn't stop bothering him, he'd paint a nativity scene in my room. Can I help?"

"I think we have everything under control, Far," Nagi said. "Thanks, though."

The Irish man pouted slightly and turned to examine some of the displays filling the room.

Looking back at the events that followed, Ken could only conclude that some unseen force had been working against them that day. Farfarello had been about to leave the Koneko and head back upstairs when a man walked in to pick up an order. Ordinarily, this wouldn't have bothered Berserker the slightest bit, but this man was a Christian priest, white collar and all.

As soon as the man walked through the door, Farfie lunged at him, his earlier sanity forgotten at the sight of a Man of God. Nagi yelped and seized him in a tight telekinetic hold. Ken grabbed his arms so the priest wouldn't realize what was going on. Remarkably, the priest managed to pick up his order, pay, and leave without blood shed.

Ken breathed a sigh of relief as the man left the building and Farfarello calmed down. "Well," he said, "at least this day can't get any worse…"

Farfarello ripped himself away from Ken with a squawk of terror. "Don't say that! Why did you say that! You just invoked Murphy! Murphy's Law! He might hurt God, but he's a menace! Even I don't want anything to do with him!"

Once again, Ken could only stare in surprise and a mutter a soft "oh."

"Wow, Ken," Nagi commented, eyes wide. "You've stumbled onto something both Farfie and Berserker are afraid of."

Ken gulped. What had he done now? Murphy wasn't real…he hoped. No sooner had that thought crossed his mind, the door opened once again.

"Irrama-acck!"

Standing before them, complete with pink umbrella, was Tot of Schreient. "I'm here to pick up an arrangement for Tamiko-san!"

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Well, folks, if you hadn't figured it out, we love making the boys' lives miserable. But it'll get better, don't you worry…eventually._

_Anywho, as we said above, this is the beginning of "Aya's Week of Hell", a 4 chapter mini-arc. Cookies to whoever guesses what happens after we reach the straw that broke the camel's back!_

_Those who already know coughSilverRaynecough, you can't say anything._

AYA AGRAVATION CHART

ch. 6

_Ah, yes, the Aya Aggravation Chart. Ptath's meager attempt to recreate, using a keyboard, what is drawn in the Great Story Notebook, GSN from now on. Can you see where this is going? Bwahahaha._

_I (Ptath) would like to thank my next door dorm neighbor for giving me the GSN as a secret valentine present and for putting up with Lady Raina and I while we're working things out. We get pretty loud. And here's a happy thought: we've used 16 5.5x7" pages and 3 loose leaf sheets of paper for this story…and the planned sequel._

_That's right folks, we already have a sequel in the planning stages! The real cause for long delays between chapters is Lady Raina having to kick Ptath in the rear a few times to actually get these chapters written. We know what's going to happen (Ptath has actually written the last page of the last chapter) but, like they say, it's the journey that's hard._

_Wow, long sentence (what with the parentheses and all) ok, Ptath is going to bed. It's 3:08 am and it shows…_

_Now, if you've actually read all that, big plate of cookies for you! But to get your cookies, you must review! Review!_

_Ptath is inspired by reviews and actually starts writing! Lady Raina comes by more often to deliver swift kicks, thus getting the chapters written! So review! Save Ptath's tush!_

…

_Definitely bedtime…_

_Night night!_


	7. Chapter 7 preview

**Preview of: Total Mayhem: Chapter Seven – Commentary from the Peanut Gallery**

_Ptath: I was popping around the internet today when I realized that it been several weeks since this story was updated and the next few chapters will be coming out pretty slow._

_The problem lies in the fact that it's summer. Lady Raina and I live about 250 miles apart (a 5 hour drive) and we don't get on AIM as often as we should. The writing is continuing, but without Raina kicking me in the butt and a 9-5 job (sorta…it's a temp job), I'm not finding much time to write._

_Since the story is open at this very moment, I'm going to get more written. How much…eh, we'll see._

_For now: PREVIEW!_

_PREVIEW!_

_PREVIEW_

_This is the beginning of the next chapter. The rest will be out soon, I promise._

_Hope you enjoy!_

_

* * *

_

Omi bounded out of the computer room happily. He'd just finished transferring the contents of the old computer onto the new one and was thrilled by the faster system. He'd also noticed that Schwarz had kept a separate system for the Koneko's security (he rather pitied any would-be thief who tried to break in). He also knew that Nagi served as Schwarz's computer geek; he was looking forward to comparing notes.

The energetic teenager headed for the stairs, with every intention of making sure he had everything he needed to continue school the next day. As he passed the kitchen, however, he made the mistake of glancing inside…and saw Aya-chan plying Nagi and Ken with…something.

For a moment, he warred with himself over what to do. He had no desire to see his friends suffer and they were obviously upset about something. His more cynical side, however, noted that he would regret asking and didn't Aya-chan seem to have things well in hand anyways?

Before he could decide, though, Aya-chan glanced up and spotted him. "Omi-san," she greeted. "could you finish setting the table, please? I was almost done when Nagi-kun and Ken-san finished their shift and staggered up here."

Omi smiled warmly at his friend's sister and picked up the remaining dishes. After watching him retreat, Aya-chan gave Nagi and Ken a critical once-over before proclaiming them fit to help get dinner on the table. Within minutes, Nagi was floating various dishes towards the table while Ken was enlisted to track down the other members of Weiss and Schwarz…or Schuldig. Which ever came first, really.

Ken shuddered as he pulled the door to Aya's room shut. Why was he always the one to walk in on seemingly embarrassing situations?

* * *

_Well, dinner's ready and that looks like a good stopping place. The rest of the chapter will be finished soon and on the net ASAP._

_Thanks for all your patience!_


	8. Commentary from the Peanut Gallery

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Seven – Commentary from the Peanut Gallery**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_Inspired by our muse Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

Omi bounded out of the computer room happily. He'd just finished transferring the contents of the old computer onto the new one and was thrilled by the faster system. He'd also noticed that Schwarz had kept a separate system for the Koneko's security (he rather pitied any would-be thief who tried to break in). He also knew that Nagi served as Schwarz's computer geek; he was looking forward to comparing notes.

The energetic teenager headed for the stairs with every intention of making sure he had everything he needed to return to school the next day. As he passed the kitchen, however, he made the mistake of glancing inside…and saw Aya-chan plying Nagi and Ken with…was that brandy?

For a moment, he warred with himself over what to do. He had no desire to see his friends suffer and they were obviously upset about something. His more cynical side, however, noted that he would most likely regret asking and didn't Aya-chan seem to have things well in hand anyways?

Before he could decide, though, Aya-chan glanced up and spotted him. "Omi," she greeted. "Could you finish setting the table, please? I was almost done when Nagi and Ken finished their shift and staggered up here."

Omi smiled warmly at his friend's sister and picked up the remaining dishes. After watching him retreat, Aya-chan gave Nagi and Ken a critical once-over before proclaiming them fit to help get dinner on the table. Within minutes, Nagi was floating various dishes towards the table while Ken was enlisted to track down the other members of Weiss and Schwarz…or Schuldig. Which ever came first, really.

* * *

Ken shuddered as he pulled the door to Aya's room shut. Why was he always the one to walk in on seemingly embarrassing situations? And then find out that there was a legitimate reason for the two people to be curled up on a bed…

'Damn it, I want to stop walking in on these kinds of situations!' he thought before hanging his head. 'I should not get my head bitten off for drawing a logical conclusion from seeing people in a bedroom, on a bed, lying very close to one another.'

Ken sighed. First he invoked Murphy's Law, then he provoked Aya into throwing a very heavy hardback at him. What next?

* * *

Schuldig was laughing so hard he looked like he was having a convulsion. Sitting stiffly upright next to him was an infuriated Abyssinian. Schuldig made a vain attempt at getting his laughter under control. '_Did you see the look on his face?_' he asked. '_I've never seen someone's face turn that red! And the apologies…_' Schuldig started laughing again.

Aya growled, annoyed that Ken hadn't bothered knocking, that Ken had taken one look at them and had assumed they were having a…romantic encounter when they had, in fact, been working on developing his mental shields. Physical contact made it easier for Schuldig to show him just how to start building his shields. Damn it, if Kudoh heard about this, he'd be impossible to live with.

'_Don't worry, Ayan,_' Schuldig sent. '_I'll tell Kenken to keep his mouth shut right after I tell everyone that dinner's ready._'

Aya closed his eyes and nodded sighed softly before sending his own reply. '_Thank you._'

Schuldig felt his trademark smirk sliding across his face. '_It's no hair off my back. After all, I'm sure you'll be willing to…provide monetary compensation for me for i-_AAAAAA_!' _The German let out a loud yelp of pain as a sharp elbow plowed into his ribs. He whimpered softly. '_I'd like to withdraw that last sentence_.'

Aya merely snorted in response.

Schuldig decided a change of topic would be beneficial. '_So, sounds like Aya-chan finished dinner. Ready to eat?_'

'_Yes,_' Aya replied. '_Call the others, like you said you would._' Having said his piece, he swung his legs over the end of the bed and rose to his feet. Schuldig sighed softly, flopping back on the bed as he reached for the familiar minds of Weiss and Schwarz.

'_Hey, all,_' he called. '_Dinner's ready, so get your butts moving._'

'_Schuldig, you will **not** take that tone of voice with me_,' Crawford shot back from his office.

'_Aw, come on, Brad,_' Mastermind replied. '_I just want to make sure that Aya-chan's cooking doesn't get cold._' Schuldig grinned as he felt the American's frustration and irritation. '_You know, those negative thoughts you're having are really bad for your health._'

Schuldig had started snickering when he was suddenly whacked upside the head. He pitched forward and landed face down on the mattress. "What was that for," he howled.

Aya, now headed out of the room, simply said, "Crawford asked me to."

* * *

Overall, dinner was a subdued affair. Nagi and Ken were determined not to start complaining before Yohji. Considering the day he'd described in the shop, it was only a matter of time before the words issued forth. Ken was confident that once the lanky blonde stopped eating long enough to talk, the 'horror' of returning to work would emerge.

Aya-chan watched everyone eating with a beaming smile, thrilled to see her meal so well received. Brad was eating with his usual dignity, and would not speak until he had finished. Farfarello kept glancing at Ken, looking both worried and afraid. Ken's eyes kept turning to Yohji-kun, as though waiting for him to do something interesting. Her nii-san and Schuldig appeared to be having a silent argument, with the swordsman looking more and more violent by the second. Nagi kept his eyes on his plate and Omi's eyes darted from one person to the next.

'The way everyone's looking at everything but their plates, I wouldn't be surprised if someone got food on their face,' she thought with exasperation. Really, didn't they know better? Dinner was a time to converse, to rehash the day and plan for tomorrow! To regale each other with tales of laughter and daring-do. Not nervous eye movements!

Determined to drag the meal onto its proper course, Aya-chan quickly reviewed an amusing story she'd heard a few days ago. Before she could speak however, the sound of high heals climbing the stairs echoed through the room.

"Sorry to interrupt dinner," Manx said as she stepped into view.

"We wanted to see how everyone's getting along," Birman continued. "And let you know what Kritiker's decided about having Weiss and Schwarz working together."

"We were just finishing," Crawford said, glancing over the table. "Would you prefer to take this to the briefing room?"

"But-" Yohji started, glancing at his plate, before sighing. Of course he wouldn't be allowed to finish dinner. Not after the kind of day **he'd** had. Rising, he brushed past the two women and clomped towards the stairs.

The rest of the room stared after him in shock. Kudoh Yohji ignoring a chance to flirt with two attractive women?

"He's had a bad day," Nagi murmured as the plates on the table suddenly rose and floated into the kitchen. Everyone stood and began to drift downstairs after their teammate.

* * *

"Gentlemen," Manx began, "Kritiker has a new mission for you. You will have three days to prepare and only six of you will-"

Yohji who had been sitting a bit glassy-eyed during the briefing returned to earth rather noticeably. "What the bloody hell are you doing bringing us a mission! I thought we were supposed to be learning to live together, not turning our backs on people we thought would kill us less than a week ago!"

A stunned silence filled the room as Yohji continued to rave and rant. In a matter of minutes, everyone learned that machines were evil, the vases of the world were conspiring to make him fall and break a bone and that thorns were actively seeking people's veins.

Farfarello glared at the blonde, "At least you didn't invoke Murphy! Tot of Schreient appeared! Immediately after Ken summoned that malevolent spirit!"

"How can Tot be alive? Weiss's mission report said that all of Schreient was dead!" Manx roared over Berserker's voice.

Nagi could feel his cheeks heating. They were beginning to stray into territory he'd just as soon forget. He could see out of the corner of his eye that Crawford, sitting in his throne-like chair, had no intention of explaining. And if he let Schuldig do it…he shuddered.

"It's kinda…my fault. We still haven't figured out how I did it, but…" he hesitated when seventeen eyes turned towards him. "When I, err, leveled the building, I somehow brought Tot back to life."

Manx could feel her temples throbbing. "Are there any OTHER powers that Kritiker has not been informed of?"

Without a single hesitation, Schuldig spoke up. "There's that thing with Aya. But we're working on it, so he'll be able to protect himself soon." Seeing Manx's blank look, he elaborated. "Until his shields are stronger, Aya's basically like a European castle that has the bridge down, the windows open and naked people dancing on the roof."

Without a single word, Aya seized a pillow and started trying to smother Schuldig.

Birman gave Manx a worried look. "I'm starting to think that this isn't going to work."

Crawford, getting rather annoyed, spoke out in a flat voice. "It WILL work. Even if I have to start shooting hands and feet to make it work." He looked over at Schuldig's weakening struggles and Aya's red face. "Abyssinian, let him go."

Reluctantly releasing the German, Abyssinian gave Oracle his deadliest Shi-ne! glare.

"Well," Manx began, hoping that she would somehow regain control of this meeting. "Oracle, if you can send me the details on Abyssinian's…powers, I'll give you the mission packets and we'll be on our way."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Thank you, everyone, for waiting so long for this update! This summer has proved that to write, Lady Raina and Ptath MUST be in the same room. We are back at school and rooming together, so expect updates to appear much more regularly. We've also mapped out the entire story. Barring a chapter turning out to be too long or something of the like, this story will be 25 chapters long. We know what needs to happen in each chapter, so it's just a matter of writing it. Thanks again for your patience._

_Sacral, we're sorry we took so long. Chapters will be appear much more often and yes, there will be shonen ai in this story. The sequel will probably be closer to yaoi than shonen ai. _

_All you Schuldig fans, he's going to be much more important soon, so just sit tight. The chapters will come when they come, which should be at least 2 times a month (we hope)._


	9. March of the Fangirls

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Eight – March of the Fangirls**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**6:00 am**

Ken toweled his hair dry as he walked towards the stairs. Joy of joys, he got to open the Koneko, alone. Yohji had claimed the afternoon shift with Aya-chan, Aya and Schuldig were still working on managing Aya's new-found telepathy and Omi, Nagi and Sakura were going to be in school all day. He wasn't even going to try and get Crawford to help. He'd probably shoot him or something.

A blood-curdling scream suddenly rent the air. Ken spun at the top of the stairs, his damp towel falling to the floor behind him. 'Aya,' he frantically thought as he dove for the Weiss leader's door, 'that was Aya!' He'd never heard Aya scream like that. He couldn't begin to imagine what Schuldig had done to produce such an outcry.

Flinging the door open, Ken glanced around the empty bedroom frantically. Seeing only an empty room, he moved on towards the bathroom.

* * *

**6:05 am**

Nagi hadn't thought that living with Weiss could be so similar to living with Schwarz…or rather, Schuldig. For one thing, he'd never expected to find Ken sitting at the table holding an icepack to a swollen head the way Schuldig often did.

"Do I want to know?" he asked the soccer player politely.

"More of the same," Ken replied. His head hit the table with a soft _ow_. "I'm just not going to go into anybody's room ever again. Bad things happen when I do."

"I…see…" Nagi studied Ken for a moment. "How did you manage to get **three** lumps on your head?"

"One's from last night…Aya threw a book at me. This one's from a shampoo bottle and the other from tripping on my towel when I finally came downstairs."

Nagi took a moment to reflect on that statement. Schuldig got beat up when he went out clubbing and hit on the wrong person while drunk. Ken got beat up when he was trying to help someone. That someone was usually the person that beat him up. It really wasn't very fair, was it?

Nagi cocked his head slightly when he heard someone start stumbling down the stairs…no, make that crashing down the stairs.

"Who the bloody hell left this towel here?"

Ah, Kudoh was up. Odd, he'd sworn that he didn't get up before eleven.

"Hey, Yohji," Ken said, his head still on the table.

Yohji stumbled into the room. Seeing the icepack resting next to Ken, he picked it up and stuck it on his own head. "Between Aya screaming and that bloody towel, I almost feel hung over," he muttered. Turning, he wove a path towards the kitchen and the coffee.

Nagi sat down at the table and pulled out his laptop. The day had hardly started and he already had plenty to record in his journal.

Suddenly, singing could be heard from the top of the stairs. Ken raised his head, his eyes wide. "Is that Farfarello singing a song from _Oklahoma_?"

"Yes," Nagi replied absently, "he sings every morning, practically. I'm surprised you didn't hear him yesterday. He was singing _Barney's Greatest Hits_."

A thump indicated that the Irish man had fallen prey to the towel that still lay limply on the stairs. There was a moment of silence before he burst out laughing. Bounding into the room, Farfarello gave Nagi a huge grin before planting himself in the chair next to Ken. "Crawford's giving Schu-schu hell. Something about not using cameras in the bathroom."

Ken groaned and his head hit the table again.

Omi's voice drifted downstairs. "Ken, what was all that screaminNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGG…"

A series of small thumps ending with one particularly loud thump heralded Omi's arrival. "…about…" he finished weakly.

Yohji emerged from the kitchen with a tray of coffee cups. "We should really think about moving that towel."

After several moments of silence, Farfarello gave everyone a sadistic grin. "Let's leave it for Braddikins."

The others stared at him in horror and sprang to their feet. A sudden crashing noise and wild cursing indicated that they were too late. They all sat back down.

"Who ever left this towel on the stairs is going to die."

Ken slid under the table. Omi let out a weak groan as Crawford's knee left his stomach.

Crawford staggered into the room, glaring malevolently at the assembled team. Nagi glanced up from his computer, still typing. 'He didn't see this coming…that's been happening a lot lately,' he thought.

A sudden blast of rage, anger and bloodlust suddenly washed over Weiss and Schwarz. Hysterical laughter exploded from upstairs. Schuldig came bounding down taking two steps at a time and waving a small Polaroid in the air. Hard on his heels was Aya, red faced and roaring with anger.

"Anybody wanna see a nekkid picture of Ayan?" he called.

The blast of wild emotions intensified into a nuclear strike.

Schuldig jumped the last few steps, landing next to Omi's limp form that still lay sprawled on the ground.

Aya's foot landed directly on the damp towel that had worked its way from the third floor to the second floor. Tumbling head over heels, he landed on top of Omi, hearing a weak _oof_ underneath him. He lay still for a moment, stunned before suddenly lunging at Schuldig. The German hit the floor with Aya's hands around his neck. The Polaroid fluttered to the ground forgotten.

Omi let out a faint, pained whimper.

"Is everything alright down there?" Aya-chan cried as she ran down the stairs. "I've been hearing screaming, cursing and getting the worst vibes!" She stopped dead when she saw her brother kneeling on Schuldig's chest, hands wrapped around his throat. She blinked in shock, then suddenly noticed the Polaroid abandoned on the floor. She bent over and picked it up. Her face went bright red before hardening in determination.

She folded the picture and helped the battered Omi to his feet. When they reached the dining room, she helped Omi to a chair and handed the folded picture to Crawford. She picked up a coffee cup and took a sip before turning around.

"Nii-san, he's unconscious, you can let him go now."

**6:15 am**

**

* * *

**

**4:05 pm**

The Koneko had quieted considerably over the past few hours. Upon awakening an hour after breakfast, Schuldig had received a harsh tongue-lashing from both Crawford and Aya-chan. Aya himself had refused to accept his apology despite the gift of new copies of his favorite books, several pounds of chocolate and a genuine promise to never enter the bathroom while Aya was inside.

"What a day," Nagi groaned as he, Sakura and Omi stumbled into the Koneko. Omi and Nagi had high-tailed it out of the Koneko as fast as humanly possible. This, naturally, had proved to be a mistake. The Koneko Fangirls had mobbed the two assassins when they reached school. And now that school was out, it was only a matter of minutes before the after-school invasion arrived.

* * *

**4:07 pm**

Aya buried his head under the pillow. The fangirls had arrived at the Koneko in force – each hoping to see one of the florists that had originally opened the shop. Of the four members of Weiss, Omi was the only one in the shop. Ken had left after his shift to get ready for his kiddie soccer team and Yohji after his to go bar hopping.

Aya could feel his temples throbbing, signaling an impending migraine.

* * *

**5:10 pm**

Schuldig looked at the slender leader of Weiss. He'd returned from an unsuccessful trip to mall where he'd attempted to find something, anything, to try and convince Aya to forgive him ten minutes ago. He'd discovered Aya curled up on his bed in a tight ball, his mental shields still not strong enough to block the hormonal outpouring from the Koneko Fangirls below. Luckily for Aya, all it had taken was one silent command from the German to disperse the teenage girls. Now, ten minutes later, the younger assassin was beginning to recover from the mental assault.

"They won't be coming back anytime soon unless they're actually buying something."

"…"

"And if they do come back, they'll feel compelled to be quiet and respectful."

"…Thank you."

"So you forgive me?"

"I suppose…"

Schuldig grinned widely.

"You're still not allowed in the bathroom when I'm in there."

"Damn."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_We hoped you enjoyed this chapter as much as we enjoyed writing it! Huge thanks to our new muse Thalia, named for the Greek Muse of Comedy. Thalia, without you, this story wouldn't have come together as well as it has._

_We'd also like to thank all our reviewers for their encouraging words! So thank you Anendee Lauren Ryan, rebelyell59, gonyos_ _and everyone else who read and enjoyed our story._

_As we said before, Ptath and Lady Raina are back at college and back on a schedule, so updates should come about once a week. It takes about five hours to knock out a chapter and we usually start working on it during Stargate: SG1, so updates will appear sometime Friday, Saturday or Sunday. If we don't get a chapter out, then we promise there's a reason for it._

_Up next: Chapter 9 – The Great Outdoors!_

_Please review so we can know what you like, didn't like or were confused by! Thanks so much for reading!_

_-Ptath and Lady Raina_


	10. The Great Outdoors

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Nine – The Great Outdoors**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

Ken gripped his coffee mug tightly. 'Please,' he thought desperately, 'don't let today start out like it did yesterday.' Aya-chan was puttering around the kitchen, putting the finishing touches on breakfast. There was no telling who would make it down in time to enjoy it, though. The previous day's fun had been caused by Aya's screaming. Schuldig seemed to be behaving himself today, so there had been no early wake-up call.

He glanced over at Crawford. He and Aya-chan were the only people up and he couldn't hear any movement from upstairs. Maybe…maybe today would be ok after all.

* * *

Farfarello straightened a few pots. Then he pushed them around. And then he straightened them a bit more. Wasn't there anything else to do in here? He'd decided the night before that Ken probably needed looking after. Anyone who was so careless about invoking Murphy clearly needed help.

Of course, it could have been a one-time event. Nothing too major had happened so far. The fangirls had made their usual stop at the Koneko on their way to school, but the appearance of a one-eyed Irish mad-man seemed to put them off a bit and they'd left quickly.

Far cast a longing glance at the clock. It was almost eleven. After that, Ken would end his shift and the Koneko would be closed for lunch. If the idiot managed to make it until lunch without incident then he would be free to go find that priest that had wandered in on the Day of Murphy…

The pattering of feet indicated the arrival of a new customer. The sound of a flower pot hitting the floor informed Berserker that Ken had noticed the customer and was not happy about it. So much for making it through the day without Murphy making an appearance.

Ken gulped when Tot's eyes focused on him.

"Konnichiwa, Ken," she exclaimed. "Tamiko would like another bouquet, please. It's for her brother. What would you recommend?"

* * *

Schuldig bit back the urge to simply throttle the other redhead. Just because Crawford said he wasn't allowed to kill him didn't mean he wasn't allowed to maim him. All he'd done was ask what Aya-chan had been talking about when she'd mentioned pink sneakers. There was no reason to keep hitting him with those damned chopsticks!

'_You annoying little freak, I was just asking you a question!'_ he growled silently. _'So stop hitting me and finish eating! When will you get it in your head that Talents need to eat more to be able to power our abilities!'_

"Nii-san, Schuldig, please stop arguing."

Both telepaths jumped at the sound of Aya-chan's voice. After a moment of silence, Aya returned to his meal, doing his best to ignore the German that was now giving him a rather curious look.

'_Don't tell me you didn't hear her either?' _Schuldig asked.

'_No, I didn't…'_ Aya's eyes narrowed. _'What did you mean by that?'_

'_What? Oh, that. I've never been able to hear her. Not when she was in a coma and not since she woke up. I've known Talents who give up everything they had for a chance to figure out how she just flies under the radar like that.'_

_

* * *

_

Ken shoved the last bit of lunch into his mouth. His brown eyes wandered over to the Irish man who had decided to join him for lunch. "So…" he finally said. "I take it you have nothing to do today?" Farfarello shook his head. "I need to buy some new soccer gear. Want to help."

"…Sure."

"Great!" Ken was practically bouncing in his seat. "We only have four hours until school gets out, so we'd better hurry!"

* * *

Ken let his eyes wander greedily over the rows and rows of soccer gear. He was in heaven. His usual Kritiker salary was on the generous side. With eight months of back-pay at his disposal…

_Thwack_

Ken glanced over towards the golf equipment. Farfarello had wandered over there when Ken had failed to respond after a few minutes of staring at the shiny new gear.

_Thwack._

…

_Glass shattering…_

_The sound of a golf club hitting the ground…_

"You're going to have to pay for that, you know," Ken told Farfarello. The Irish madman ignored him in favor of studying the nearby soccer cleats. A distressed wail echoed from the golf section.

"Farfarello," Ken began, extending a hand towards the other assassin. Said assassin spun around, a soccer cleat on his hand, the spikes pointing outwards.

Ken's body went rigid as the metal tips rammed into his hand. He whimpered slightly. It wasn't his fault…

* * *

Yohji sauntered down the stairs to steal a bit of dinner before heading out. Kudoh Yohji was getting back in action.

"You do realize that you reek, don't you?"

Ah, Crawford.

"Maybe to your untrained palate, _oh mighty leader_, but I have received numerous compliments on my cologne," Yohji shot back.

"They must have been unduly influenced by the stench. No matter, however. Make sure you're back in time for you shift tomorrow and you won't be excused on the grounds that you're hung-over."

'Bastard,' Yohji thought.

He decided to skip tasting Aya-chan's dinner and continued down to the garage. Inside, he discovered that Ken was putting his bike away after soccer practice. Farfarello, he also noticed, appeared to have tagged along.

"Have fun playing with the midgets, Ken-Ken?"

"Oh shut up," Ken muttered. He eyed Yohji's outfit for a moment before commenting. "You look like a slut."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Yohji commented dryly. "Be good, now."

Ken glared at Yohji as he pulled the Seven out of the garage and roared away. He sighed and hitched the bag of soccer gear higher. "Let's go in," he said to Farfarello.

The Irish man nodded and followed him upstairs, getting off at the second floor. Ken continued upwards to his room. After a quick shower, he threw on fresh clothes and headed back down for dinner.

"Hello, Ken," Aya-chan said, "how was practice?"

"Ok," he replied. "It was great seeing all the kids again." A goofy smile stretched across his face as he thought back to the practice match he and the kids had played.

Aya-chan grinned at him and handed him a dish. "Could you put this on the table, Ken?" she asked.

"Of course," he said and carried it to the table. A few minutes later, Aya-chan called everyone to dinner.

Schuldig looked at Farfarello. "You seem happy," he commented.

"Soccer is fun," was the reply.

"Did you go with Ken," Aya-chan asked.

"He did," Ken replied. "The kids loved him. The parents were terrified of him, which made the kids love him even more." He paused for a moment before continuing. "They had never seen someone who could dive through the mud and get dragged along the ground as much as Farfie did. They were very impressed."

The others eyed Berserker for a moment. He didn't have a scratch on him, unlike Ken who was covered in scrapes, cuts and bruises. Despite the shower he had taken earlier, he still had a faint air around him of mud and dirt. Farfarello's white clothes were spotless, however, and he hadn't changed in three days.

'I don't think we want to know how he managed to stay clean,' Nagi murmured to Omi.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Well folks, only one chapter left in Aya's Week of Hell! Stay tuned for chapter 10: The Final Straw. _

_Big thanks to rebelyell59, Sacral, Anendee, NekoHitori and Sylvirwing! Your reviews mean a lot to us and we appreciate it._

_Q and A time: _

_Q:_

"_the chapter _chapter 8_ seemed to be more of a space-filler"_

_A:_

_In a way, this was a space-filler. Aya's having a bad week and it just keeps getting worse. "March of the Fangirls" is part of a mini-arc that ends in chapter 10, The Final Straw. It's all heading towards one event and we're almost there. _

_Q:_

"_is it supposed to sound like Aya screams like a girl"_

_A:_

_Wouldn't you be screaming if someone coughSchuldigcough had just whipped back the shower curtain and started snapping pictures with the intent on sharing it with everyone in the house?_

_Q:_

"_who did leave the towel"_

_A:_

_It was Ken. He dropped it when he went to go "save" Aya. Because of everyone tripping on it, it made its way from the third floor to the second floor. Ouch._

_Q: (not really…)_

"_that was a very thoughtful gift from Schu"_

_A:_

_Schu does like Aya and doesn't want him to be mad at him…of course, he is hoping Aya will eventually start sleeping with him…but mostly it was to apologize for his earlier "mistake"._

_Q: (not really, again…)_

"_I like especially how you made Aya a little grumpy, over-protective big brother"_

_A:_

_Just wait a few chapters and we'll see Crawford cowering behind Aya-chan for protection from the big, bad Aya._

_Hope that answer everything! Any more questions? Just drop us a line on your way out by pushing that little button down there that says "review"._

_See you next week!_

_PS: just as a side note, if a chapter appears without section breaks, it means the network here at school as started crawling like rush-hour traffic and getting the story up to begin with was a half-hour event. We'll try to make sure they're in, but please bear with us. Thanks again! _

_PPS: if you like Harry Potter, we've started an HP story called Twice in a Lifetime! Feel free to check it out!_


	11. The Final Straw

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Ten – The Final Straw**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**4:00 am**

Yohji staggered into his room, roaring drunk and completely exhausted. Without even undressing, he collapsed onto the bed and passed out.

* * *

**9:00 am**

The world was shaking. Yohji thought this was rather odd since it didn't feel like an earthquake. And if it wasn't an earthquake, what could be causing the shaking? With a groan, he pried an eye open and looked up. Looming above him was Crawford, flashing glasses and all.

"Get up, Kudoh, I have an errand for you."

Yohji looked over at his clock. 9:02 am. "Sorry, _Dad_, but my shift doesn't start till 12. Come back then." With that said, Yohji rolled away from Crawford and tugged his comforter over his lanky form.

Surprisingly, Crawford made no effort to stop him. Instead, he reached into his jacket and removed a CD. He walked over to the small stereo on a nearby shelf, inserted it and turned it on.

Yohji shot straight up a look of pure terror on his face. Crawford watched him smugly, before speaking. "Farfarello's Greatest Hits. This song is called "Mary's Wedding." The next one is "Somewhere over the Rainbow" and after that is "You are my Sunshine."

Yohji rested his aching head in his hands. He'd definitely had too much to drink last night…He looked up wearily. "What errand?"

* * *

**9:15 am**

'It has to be illegal to make people get up this early,' Yohji thought. Crawford's harassment had gotten him up, showered and dressed in 15 minutes. All to take a stupid packet of documents to the post office…They weren't even Kritiker documents! Nooo, they were the insurance forms for the Koneko. Did they really need those?

Yohji ran a hand through his damp hair. Oracle had only given him enough time to take a few swallows of coffee before shoving the packet at him and growling out orders.

"Take these forms to the post office. They need an envelope and postage, so you'll have to wait in line. When you're done with that, there's a shipment of fertilizer that needs to be picked up. Ken's working and Farfarello isn't allowed to drive. Aya and Schuldig will be keeping an eye on you, so don't take any side trips and be back in time for your shift."

Yohji groaned again. It was a 15 minute drive to the post office and it was always packed…

* * *

**10:00 am**

Aya growled softly, trying to ignore the snoring German stretched out next to him. Schuldig claimed that having to shield the new telepath had wearied him and that he required rest. As a result, Abyssinian had gotten stuck making sure that Yohji didn't take any detours while running errands for Crawford.

Opening his mind once more, he _stretched_ out and found Yohji's familiar mind. Finding the _smoky-dark-blue_ mind that was Yohji's, he snorted softly when he realized that the assassin had just managed to reach the front of the line.

'_Stupid-Crawford-tired-headache-hunger-woman-attraction'_

A snarl ripped through Aya as Yohji's mind filled his own. Schuldig stirred slightly and sleepily tugged the younger man down, wrapping his own shields around the other's.

* * *

**11:40 am**

Yohji took another long swallow from his bottle of water. He'd picked it up on his way out of the post office just over an hour ago and had emptied it while waiting for the van (the accursed pink van!) to be loaded with the bags of fertilizer. After making it back to the Koneko, he'd refilled it with tap water. 'This tastes so gross,' he thought with a shudder.

Hefting another bag, he began to grumble to himself. 'Crawford can't be bothered to do physical labor, oh no, he might ruin his suit.' Yohji kicked an unoffending bag of fertilizer after dropping the one he was carrying. 'Bastard gets me up after less than five hours of sleep, doesn't give me time to _eat_, makes me stand in lines with crying babies for hours, sends me to go pick up a delivery of fertilizer, of course Ken couldn't go pick it up, sends me straight to work with no _lunch_.' Yohji slammed another bag down. 'It'll be _his_ fault if I pass out from _starvation_.'

Right before he could lower the last bag to the ground, a small black cat that had wandered into the storeroom darted under his foot. '&#$#(&$!' he swore as he fell to the ground, the large bag falling on top of him.

* * *

**12:06 pm**

Crawford leaned back in his chair, hands steepled before him. "Let me see if I understand your…request," he said slowly. "You want to work in the Koneko with Ken so you can protect him from Murphy's Law?"

Farfarello made a frantic hushing noise as his one eye darted about the room frantically. "Don't say that name! You'll draw _it_ to you!"

Crawford pinched the bridge of his nose. "Fine, I'll add you to the shifts. Any incidents, however, and you're done." He gave the Irish man a piercing look. "That means the Pope himself could walk in and you **will not attack him**, is that understood?"

Farfarello pouted for a moment before sighing and nodding.

"Good," Crawford said. "I assume you are joining Hidaka at soccer practice? You may inform him then that you will be assisting him."

* * *

**1:42 pm**

"I suppose the worst part is the smell. I guess that's rather stereotypical, but it's true." Aya-chan paused for a moment, reflecting on the class she'd attended the night before. "I've never noticed a smell before. Remember the frogs you'd dissect in high school? I never noticed a smell when we were doing them. Of course," she considered, "I did have a cold at the time…"

Yohji was very glad he hadn't eaten all day. Very, very glad. Why, he'd even forgiven Crawford for getting him up early. This way, he _knew_ that there wasn't anything left in his stomach to throw up. How Aya-chan could just prattle on like that about dissecting cats for Anatomy and Physiology…he shuddered.

"Tell me again why you're performing autopsies? I thought you were still taking pre-med courses."

Aya-chan giggled. "We have to see where everything is, of course! You can only learn so much from textbooks, after all."

"Ah."

Yohji felt faint.

* * *

**4:05 pm**

'My, but there are a lot of stairs,' Yohji thought absently. His weary thoughts were trudging through his brain as slowly as his feet were moving. Finally reaching the second floor, he stopped for a moment, trying to decide if it was worth the effort to go search for food. A sudden gurgle from his stomach answered his question for him.

He staggered off the stairs and headed for the kitchen. 'Nothing too heavy,' he mused. 'And definitely nothing meat-related…' he shuddered. Aya-chan had gone into a little **too** much detail about her most recent classes. 'Maybe…some ramen?' He could feel himself perking up at the mere idea of food. He happily set about boiling some water and pulled a soda out of the fridge.

When his food was finally ready, he carefully carried it to the table. He sat down and picked up his chopsticks. He carefully scooped up some noodles…

* * *

**4:08 pm**

Aya rocked back on his heals, his book falling limply to the ground as a wave of pure bliss swamped him.

'_bliss-satisfaction-heaven-salty-warm-happiness'_

'_Schu—Schuldig!' _he gasped, trying to push the _Other_ away. His meager shields, shields he was still trying to build, had been wavering under the constant onslaught of Tokyo's large population.

'_food-hunger-satingwarmblissthoughtspartygirlsexbeer-_

Schuldig's hands grabbed his shoulders, and his now-familiar shields wrapped around his mind. _'Kudoh's really pushing it today, neh?' _ Schuldig asked softly, secretly glad that someone besides himself had earned Abyssinian's ire. Aya could only nod weakly as he slumped back against the German's chest.

* * *

**10:00 pm**

Nagi and Omi were sitting side by side in the dining room, snacking on a bowl of ice cream as they discussed the best way to secure the Koneko's wireless connection. The clump of feet on the stairs interrupted their heating debate. Omi glanced up, a flicker of surprise crossing his face.

"You're going out again, Yohji?" he asked. "I thought you said earlier that you were going to sleep for a week."

"Yes, well," Yohji said in a casual tone, "Aya keeps snarling, I've taken a nap and I'd made plans the night before to meet back up with Kamiko-chan." He tossed the boys a sly wink. "If you bishounen want to come along, I'm sure I can set you up with someone…nice."

A look of horror flickered across Nagi's face. He doubted Kudoh's idea of a "nice" woman and his own were close. Actually, they probably weren't in the same _galaxy_.

"Ah," Omi stuttered, "I don't think so. We need to finish securing the network and work on the firewalls. Maybe another night."

Yohji shrugged. "If you're sure. Don't wait up," he tossed over his shoulder.

The two computer geeks exchanged a look, shuddered, and returned to their ice cream.

* * *

**2:36 am**

Aya shifted positions, still not used to sleeping next to another person. As he lay there, he strained his ears, listening for sounds of the other Koneko resident. He could hear the sound of Ken shifting in bed, of the barely heard sound of typing from Omi and Nagi's rooms, the sounds of Yohji's date laughing drunkenly…

…

… …

Yohji's date.

In the Koneko.

Drunk.

…

Aya growled softly, shifting moving closer to Schuldig. He would have to ignore it.

* * *

**2:39 am**

Yohji pulled Kamiko in for another kiss. They had had a great night so far lots of alcohol, lots of dancing and the night wasn't over yet! They both stumbled off the stairs and wove a drunken path towards Yohji's room.

* * *

**2:41 am**

Ken hit the ground with a loud thunk as a bloodcurdling scream rent the air. As he struggled to untangle himself from his blankets, he could hear feet running down the hall, first one person, then another. Finally managing to extract himself, he flung the door open and followed the sound of wild cursing. He halted instantly as he exited his room.

Schuldig had both arms around a red-faced, cursing, biting, sword-waving Aya. The long marks on the door made it look like Aya had been trying to hack down the door.

Schuldig glanced over, cursing under his breath as he struggled to restrain Aya. "That's it!" he shouted. "There's no way in hell we're gonna make any progress on homicide-boy's shields with fangirls mobbing us during the day and Kudoh bringing girls home at night! As of tomorrow, we're leaving for Villa Weiss!"

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_(Muse talking)_

_Hi. You have the pleasure of speaking to Lady Raina tonight. We have had Pixy Stixs so we are slightly incoherent thanks to the sugar (understatement of the century at least when it comes to Ptath). We know it has been two weeks and we are really, really sorry this chapter gave us some problems (also understatement. Major understatement). Ok, ok so it took some time. We hope you enjoy it. Thank you all who have reviewed, it makes us feel so special. Please continue to read and we dare you to guess what happens up at Villa Weiss. Please R&R._

_Thanks Lady Raina, Ptath and Thalia the Muse_

_Ptath looks around and clears throat_

_I'm usually the one who writes the end notes and, now that the sugar has FINALLY left my system (more or less), I'll add the Q and A's and everything else that I usually put in._

_Thanks to lonely-dreamlover, rebelyell59 and Neko Hitori for your reviews! We appreciate each and every one of them. Now for the Q and A's:_

_**Q:**_

"_didn't Brad propose to Aya-chan? When's the secret gonna be spilled? I suppose Schu doesn't know coz' he would've spilled the beans on the first day. I would LOVE Aya-kun's reaction to that! mwahahaha..."_

_**A:**_

_Yes, actually, he did. To avoid being teased by Schuldig, and since they knew that Weiss would return, Crawford and Aya-chan **have** kept their engagement a secret. Aya-kun will find out in 4 chapters, Chapter 14: Trouble Squared. Trust me, it's gunna be great._

_**Q:**_

"_I liked this chapter but was wondering why there wasn't as much description in this one as in previous ones--not really that important, cause I'll still keep reading was just a passing thought."_

_**A:**_

_Err, well, it just kind of worked out that way. Fore some reason, that chapter was a bit difficult to write. We hope we did better in this chapter. Did we?_

_**Q:**_

"_you probably should have done like the previous chapter and put in the time of day at the beginning of each section... it appears that there is a section break one paragraph too late. the break is after "Ken let his eyes wander greedily over the rows and rows of soccer gear. He was in heaven. His usual Kritiker salary was on the generous side. With eight months of back-pay at his disposal…" when it feels that it fits the context better if the break came before."_

_**A: **_

_Ah yes, we went back and fixed that. Put the times in and moved the section break and everything! We put the time in this chapter as well. We'll see if we can keep doing it!_

_shuffles reviews Well, doesn't look like there are anymore questions, so we'll go ahead and end it here for the night (well, morning…2 am, to be precise). We hope you enjoyed this latest installment of Total Mayhem! We'll do our best to get back on a "once a week" update schedule, so see you then!_


	12. Return of the Dead One

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Eleven – Return of the Dead One**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

The room was dark save for the glowing light of the television. Weiss and Schwarz were scattered throughout the room. Crawford sat in his throne-like chair directly in front of the TV. Ken and Nagi sat on the smaller of the two couches, Farfarello stretched out on the floor in front of them. Yohji was sprawled on the other couch with Omi sitting at the very end next to his feet. Aya-chan had perched herself on the arm of Crawford's chair when Manx had requested she join them. On the TV, the new Persia began to speak.

"Schatten," he began. "your mission is one of protection. This man," an image flashed onto the screen of a young man with brown hair and rather vacant eyes, "is Saito Tsuguo. He is being targeted by his older sister, Saito Tamiko." A woman with long dark hair and dark eyes appeared. Yohji sat up with a look of interest. "You must protect Tsuguo from assassination." With that, the video ended. Manx flipped the light switch and everyone blinked at the sudden brightness.

"That's it?" Ken asked, blinking in surprise. "No, 'hunt the dark beasts?'"

Manx gave him a knowing looked as she began to hand out the mission folders. "You're not hunting this time, Siberian." She dropped a folder into his lap. "The target will be coming to you."

Crawford flipped the folder open and began to scan its contents. Yohji opened his, gave it a cursory glance before looking up. "Why Schatten? I don't know about you, but when I hear that, I think of something that usually happens in bathrooms."

Manx matched his irked expression with a look of annoyance. "In keeping with Kritiker tradition, all lethal teams have German names. Weiss meant white and Schwarz meant black. Since you are combining into one team, we decided on a name that would reflect this merge." She narrowed her eyes. "If it bothers you so much, we could switch back to Grau."

"That depends," Yohji replied flippantly, "what does Grau mean?"

"Grey," Nagi murmured. "And Schatten means shadow."

Yohji blinked. "Oh."

Manx gave Nagi a friendly glance before returning to the business at hand. "Kritiker only learned of Saito Tamiko's intentions recently. We believe that she may make an attempt on her brother's life tonight so you're not going to have much time to put together a mission plan."

"If it's simple bodyguard work, then I don't see the plan becoming difficult," Crawford said coolly.

"We have reason to believe that Tot of Schreient has been taken in by Tamiko. If an attempt it going to be made, it will most likely involve her."

Nagi looked up in alarm.

"And Aya-chan?" Crawford asked, raising an eyebrow. "If I remember correctly, _she_ isn't supposed to go on missions. Why did you ask her down here?"

"Tsuguo's health is why she's here," Manx explained, silently thanking the benevolent spirits that watched over secretaries who had to deal with over-protective brothers/assasins that Aya-chan's brother wasn't in the room. "Aya-chan's presence is necessary to monitor Tsuguo's health." She paused for a moment before continuing in a flat voice. "This man is to be kept alive at **all costs**. Is that understood?"

The air in the room seemed to freeze at her tone. Omi cocked his head to one side before speaking up. "Manx-san, what exactly is it about this man that makes it so important for him to be prote-"

"I said, PUT IT BACK!"

The entire room reeled at the sudden wave of _anger-irritation-frustration_ that swept the building. Manx stood frozen, her eyes wide in shock. "Was that…Abyssinian?" she sputtered.

"Yeah, he's been a little _shi-ne!_ happy lately," Ken commented. "Apparently he can't get his shields up properly while living the middle of Tokyo. Schuldig's is taking him to the villa for some private lessons."

"I HEARD THAT!" came a scream from upstairs, followed by a wave of _anger-embarrassment-rage_.

Ken did his best to melt into the sofa cushions. "I didn't mean it like that…" he whimpered.

* * *

"Look, she's gunna be fine, so stop worrying!" Schuldig snapped. He and Aya had left the Koneko over two hours ago and the swordsman had yet to do anything but stare out the window telling himself that he shouldn't be leaving his sister alone. Not with Yohji in the house. Of course, Yohji should know better. Yohji knew he would lose any reason to go out at night if he so much as **looked** at her wrong!

The German suppressed the urge to bang his head against the steering wheel. This was going to be a long trip.

* * *

"What have you found?"

Omi and Nagi looked up at the sound of Crawford's voice. "Nothing we didn't already know or could have guessed. Tamiko _has_ taken in Tot, but it appears she has amnesia."

"Obviously," Nagi muttered, his mind going back to the day she'd appeared in the flower shop.

Crawford nodded in satisfaction. "Then the plan remains the same. We'll go over the mission in ten minutes and leave when we're done." The two hackers nodded in acknowledgement. "Now go find the others," Oracle ordered and left the room.

Nagi sighed softly and looked over at Omi. "Far will probably be with Ken."

"And Yohji will be in his room," Omi added.

* * *

Crawford surveyed the room before him. Yohji had reclaimed his seat on the sofa, Omi sitting at his feet. Ken, Farfarello and Nagi were perched on the other couch and Aya-chan had taken over his throne, 'my chair,' he corrected silently. He gave the room another once-over before speaking.

"The mission will proceed as follows. We will be stationed at Saito's house. Korat will, of course, be with Tsuguo. Prodigy, you will be his primary line of defense. Berserker," he gave the madman a sharp look, "you will be there to protect Aya-chan. If she gets hurt in anyway, then **you **get to explain to Abyssinian how his sister got hurt."

A wince ran through the room. With Aya as volatile as he was now, a **scratch** would be met with instant death. Aya-chan merely smiled in amusement.

"Bombay, you will hack into the building. Make sure you have control over the lights, air conditioning and everything else we might need. Siberian, Balinese and I will take care of Tot. Once the threat has been eliminated, our work will be done. Kritiker's intelligence indicates that she should arrive around 7 pm, giving us plenty of time to get into position. Any questions?"

Even Yohji couldn't think of anything. Crawford nodded in satisfaction, a feeling of power sweeping through him.

"Move out."

* * *

Crawford stepped into Aya-chan's room. The woman was wearing a pair of black jeans and a black, formfitting sweater. He didn't doubt that she had a least two knives tucked into her tall boots. He'd made sure she'd learned how to use them over the past few months.

"I have something for you," he said when he was finally able to tear his eyes off her slender form. She did look good in black…

"Oh?" she said as she arched an eyebrow in question. "Is this something I'll be able to show my brother without him going through the roof?" she added teasingly.

Crawford blushed slightly, knowing how her brother would have reacted if he had seen the silk negligee he'd bought for her upcoming birthday. Aya-chan giggled at the look on his face.

"Actually, it's for the mission tonight," he explained and pulled the small gun and holster out from behind his back. "I know you haven't had a chance to get one…and…well, I thought…" He was stuttering. He hadn't stuttered since he had finally learned what sex was almost 15 years ago.

Aya-chan gave him a knowing smile as she took the gun. She expertly checked to make sure the safety was on and that it was loaded before pulling the holster on. It fit perfectly into the small of her back and once her sweater had been pulled back down, there was no sign of a weapon.

Brad had turned bright red as she settled the weapon. "Yes, well…must be…uh…going…um, mission…" He fled from the room.

* * *

"Something bad just happened, I know it," Aya suddenly said, a look of worry crossing his face.

"Oh, you're worrying too much," Schuldig muttered, feeling very annoyed. "The worst that could have happened is someone sitting on Momoe's cat."

Aya didn't look convinced.

"Look," Schuldig said with a sigh, "we'll be at the Villa in about half an hour. You can give her a call then. And if that doesn't work, then we'll try to contact them telepathically, ok?"

"…"

* * *

The entire room jumped when Aya-chan's cell phone rang. "Sorry," she said with a blush a she pulled it out. "I left it on since my brother was gong to call when he got to the Villa. If I'd turned it off, he would have worried. Hello?

Tsuguo gave Crawford a wild look. Ken shuffled his feet. Yohji continued to admire the various paintings that ran the length of the room.

"I'm glad to hear that you and Schu made it to the Villa all right…what? No, nothing bad's happened, what gave you that idea?...half an hour ago?" Aya-chan's mind drifted back. Half an hour ago Brad had given her the gun… "No, nothing happened. Does it look like you have everything you'll need?...No, you don't need to come back. You went to the Villa for a reason, remember?...yes, I know…yes…all right. Nii-san…yes, but I need to study for a test tomorrow…No, Yohji has not done or said anything inappropriate!" Ken snickered. Yohji looked offended. "Leaving was not a mistake, so stop thinking that!...yes…yes, I know…all right, I'll call you tomorrow, ok?...yes…yes, I love you too. Good night."

"Sorry," she said again as she hung up. "My brother's a bit over protective."

Yohji was sputtering. "I would never….I haven't…why does he **think that?**"

Ken burst out laughing while Crawford merely smirked. "I guess your reputation has gotten the better of you, neh, Yohji?"

Tsuguo gazed at Crawford with a look of horror. "And you people are supposed to protect me?"

* * *

"See, I told you they're fine, so **stop worrying!**"

"Hn"

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Well, another chapter done with! Many thanks to gonyos, Sylverwing, lonely-dreamlover and Sacral for you outstanding reviews! (he he he, new word!) Seriously though, your reviews mean a lot to us, so please take a few minutes to say a few words!_

_**Q:**_

…

_**A:**_

…

_Oh, my. I just realized that there really aren't any questions to answer. Err, huh. Well, then…we'll just...um…um…we're glad you like the Brad/Aya-chan pairing! We've never seen it before, have you? We've seen a handful of Schu/Aya-chan and plenty with the boys, but not that one. What about y'all? Hmmm. And for those of you who like Schu and Aya…well, let's just say that we're getting started! Their past together is the foundation for the sequel: Improbability Factor. We hope you'll stick around for it!_

_Review!_

_Review!_

_Pretty please?_


	13. Technobable and Telepathy

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twelve – Technobable and Telepathy**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

_**Villa Weiss**_

Aya flipped the lights in the kitchen on, surveying the room with a critical eye. Schuldig stumbled into him, still half asleep. "So what's for breakfast," he yawned.

"Depends on what's here," Aya replied as he pried the German off his shoulder. "Do you know when the Villa was last used?"

"We were here when the Koneko got remodeled," Schuldig said, teetering slightly at the sudden loss of support. "Aya-chan packed us some food," he added after a moment of thought. He looked at Aya with pleading eyes. "Please tell me we have coffee."

Aya walked over to one of the cabinets and pulled the door open. He turned and smirked. "Not a drop."

* * *

**_The Koneko_**

"What did Manx want?"

Brad glanced over at Aya-chan. She made a pretty picture, he thought, dressed in a simple blue skirt and white shirt.

"Oracle!"

Brad blinked in confusion. Since when did Aya-chan call him…oh. "There were some details she wasn't able to get to during the last mission briefing. She thought it would be easier to just tell me rather than try to get everyone together again."

Aya-chan wrinkled her nose. "That really hasn't been working out, has it," she commented. "Every mission briefing we've had since nii-san and the others got back has descended into chaos. I can understand her not wanting to go through that again."

As she spoke, Aya-chan flipped on the stove and began preparing breakfast. Brad leaned against the counter sipping a cup of coffee, content to simply watch the younger girl work. He hadn't had much opportunity to do so since Weiss's return.

When breakfast was finally ready and everyone had stumbled downstairs (or rather, been dragged whimpering and moaning by an irked Prodigy), Crawford decided that the details of their mission would result in fewer outburst if everyone was 1) still half asleep and 2) eating, thus keeping their mouths busy.

"Manx stopped by earlier today," he began. His eye twitched slightly. Kudoh had yet to touch his food and was nursing a cup of coffee. It was obvious that his brain had yet to activate…if it ever did. Nagi and Omi were discussing something about school and Ken was trying to explain his latest plans for his kiddie soccer team to Farfarello. Aya-chan shook her head in wry amusement and rose to fetch some rolls from the kitchen.

Everyone dove under the table as the centerpiece, lovingly prepared a few days earlier by Aya-chan, exploded sending shards of glass and bits of flowers everywhere. Omi clutched a dart in a shaking hand while Yohji whimpered in pain. He _hated_ coffee burns! A throat cleared suddenly and one by one, the assassins crept back into their chairs. Crawford gave them a stern look as he re-holstered his gun.

"Now that I have your attention," he drawled, "perhaps you'd like to hear the _very important details_ about our mission last night that Manx was unable to get to?" Hearing no protests, he continued. "As you all know, our mission last night was to protect Saito Tsuguo from his sister, Saito Tamiko. Since we were unable to eliminate Tot, our current mission has become a great deal harder."

"What, exactly, _is_ our mission," Yohji drawled. He'd abandoned the traitorous cup of coffee and was now picking at his food.

"Our mission is to protect Saito Tsuguo until his 21st birthday."

Omi looked up at Crawford with obvious puzzlement. "What is it about Saito that makes him so important?"

"I was wondering that myself," Aya-chan commented as she returned with a tray of steaming cinnamon rolls. Brad felt his nose twitch slightly. Aya-chan had made it a mission to at least try to cook all his favorite foods. Her cinnamon rolls were one of her best dishes.

"Mr. Saito stands to inherit a great deal of money from a paternal grandfather when he comes of age. If he manages to inherit that money, his will states that the money will go to a distant relative who works for Kritiker. Basically, if he dies after turning 21, Kritiker will get a great deal of money. If he dies before turning 21, then his sister will get the money."

Ignoring the gaping faces around him, Crawford began to hand out their individual assignments. "Prodigy and Bombay need to design a security system for Mr. Saito. He will not be leaving his home until his birthday one month from now, so you won't need to worry about multiple locations."

Omi and Nagi paled. Working with and adapting a security system was one thing. Creating one from scratch…while doing school work, studying for the rather important tests coming up, working in the Koneko and finishing the modified trackers Kritiker had requested…

"Siberian and I will be Mr. Saito's first line of defense. Korat, you will need to give Mr. Saito a physical every few days. Despite his youth, his lifestyle is remarkably similar to our own Balinese's and his health is deteriorating rapidly. It wouldn't do for him to die of natural causes after so much work has gone into protecting him from assassination. Berserker, you will accompany Korat on her exams. Her safety will be your only concern. If you must choose between her or Mr. Saito, you will protect her."

Crawford looked at Yohji, barely containing a smirk. "Balinese, you and Sakura will maintain the Koneko."

"What!"

"It wouldn't do for our store to collapse just when it's starting to show promise, now would it? Besides, you'll have Omi and Nagi to help when they can spare a minute and I believe Farfarello has volunteered to make the deliveries."

"Pink hurts God like nothing else," the Irish man commented thoughtfully.

* * *

_**Saito Mansion**_

As Aya-chan stripped off her rubber gloves she gave Saito a severe glance. "Mr. Saito, you really need to cut back on the alcohol, the drugs…on everything, really! Your body is collapsing under the strain you're putting it under."

Saito gave the slender girl his most charming grin, something that melted into a look of terror as Berserker growled softly and glared daggers at him.

"After all," Aya-chan continued, "it wouldn't do for you to die on us after all our hard work, now would it?"

"Now, now," Saito began, "Ms…Korat, was it? I'm only-"

Aya-chan never learned what their assignment was "only" doing as the sudden chiming of her cell phone interrupted him. Aya-chan blushed. It had to be her brother. He was the only person who could call at such an awkward time.

"Sorry," she murmured as she dug her phone out of her pocket. "Moshi-moshi," she said as she and Farfarello began walking towards the door. "Oh, good morning, nii-…oh my…it covered the _entire_ kitchen?...under the fridge!...nii-…nii-san!...no, you can't kill him yet…because he's helping you build up the shields you need to stay sane…nii-san…since he didn't get to have his coffee I'd assume that he didn't do it on purpose…oh, stop fretting!...now you listen to me, the sooner you make up with Schuldig, the sooner your shields will go up and the sooner you can come back to Tokyo. Now hang up the phone, knock on the door to the bathroom and apologize for trying to cut his throat with the paring knife, do you hear me?...all right, I'll talk to you later."

She snapped the phone shut and shook her head. Yohji was leaning against the Seven smoking a cigarette. Seeing them, he took one last draw and put it out. "Finished already?"

"Yes, Yohji," she said, still in shock over what Schuldig had managed to do to the Villa in less than a day.

Yohji frowned. He could tell that Aya-chan was upset about _something_…and damned if all the assassins didn't think of her as a sister! If that Saito had done something…he straightened the collar of his shirt before sliding into the driver's seat.

As they began the short drive back to the Koneko, Yohji glanced at her before asking her what was wrong.

Aya-chan blinked and gave him a helpless look. "My brother called…you won't believe what Schuldig managed to do!"

Feeling relieved that he wouldn't have to kill their assignment, Yohji burst into laughter. "Already got Aya frothing for his blood?"

"Going for his throat, actually," the girl corrected. "Schuldig blew up the kitchen trying to make coffee."

"…"

Aya-chan began to giggle. "He wanted coffee and was only able to find some un-ground coffee beans. Since he couldn't find the grinder to grind the beans, he decided to use the blender. He forgot to put the lid on," she explained.

"Let me guess, 'Poof' go the coffee grounds?" Yohji asked as he shook with laughter.

"Yup. Nii-san went after him with a paring knife. He managed to get nii-san to leave him alone long enough to clean up all the coffee, but when he was done, Schu hid in the bathroom."

Yohji almost drove his beloved Seven through the back of their garage. Finally putting the car in park, he collapsed onto the steering wheel, howling with laughter.

* * *

The next few days passed by in a blur of planning, screaming fangirls and death threats. Back in the Koneko, Nagi and Omi were staggering about in zombie-fashion and Farfarello could be seen singing merrily as he drove the pink moped around Tokyo making deliveries.

In Villa Weiss, Aya and Schuldig had managed to reach an uneasy truce in regards to cooking (by simply banning the German from the kitchen), music (not so loud that the windows are rattling, please) and bathroom privileges (re-invoked for Schuldig after a rather embarrassing incident involving a tree, a frightened squirrel and a car of tourists that just _happened_ to be passing by.)

Despite the occasional set back, however, the two telepaths were making progress on building Aya's shields. Stretched out on his bed, the swordsman focused on his mental shields.

_'All right,'_ Schuldig sent. _'Let's see how well your shields are holding now that you've been out of Tokyo for a few days.'_ He carefully began to probe the younger man's shields, looking for weak spots. _'You're still forgetting to protect the back,'_ he said with a frown. He thought for a moment before deciding to switch tactics. _'Let's try something new. We've been working with the standard Rosenkreuz model, just imagining a smooth energy shield surrounding your mind. You've got that down solid, but you keep neglecting the back. A rather common mistake, I might add. Now, in Rosenkreuz, they fixed this problem by attacking the vulnerable spots until you fixed it or went insane. Since you're not 10, I think we can try a more advanced method of fixing this without driving you to homicide.'_

Aya felt his stomach clench at the mention of Rosenkreuz. Before he could stop it, he rolled over to look at the German. _'They did that to you, didn't they?'_

The German winced slightly._'Yes, they did,'_ Schuldig replied. _'But not for long. I was too strong for them, fought back too much. But back to you. We'll keep the basic shield for now. Once you've gotten strong and more used to your talent, we'll move on to more advanced methods. To protect the back of your mind, we'll use a completely different kind of shield and just merge it with your current one.'_

'_Now,' _Schuldig began, concentrating harder, _'The reason the energy shield model is used most is because it doubles as a training method for young telepaths. Protective energy barriers need to be fed more energy. Telepaths starting out with this method devote a lot of time and energy to maintaining these shields. This not only strengthens the shields, but it also makes them more aware of them **and** their vulnerabilities. The longer you use this method and the more familiar you become with it, the less you have to think about it.'_

As Aya listened to the other telepath's explanation, he could almost see the shields he and Schu were constructing. _'The back of the mind is mostly instincts, the subconscious, right?_' he asked.

'_Yeah, and that's why you're having so much trouble protecting it,'_ Schuldig replied. _'You've spent your entire life leaving your subconscious to your subconscious. It protected itself so you didn't have to worry about it. You're not **used** to thinking about protecting it._' Here he paused for a moment. _'Actually, this is also a problem telepaths develop if they live alone, far from other people and don't **have** to maintain their shields.'_

Aya whacked the German's ribs. He didn't need to hear about other telepaths, he needed to hear about **his** situation. Schuldig just grinned.

'_Anyways, what we're going to try is building a wall that **isn't** energy. Something we can build and forget about…well, except for maintenance. When you're constructing it, make it out of metal or something else that will stand up for a long time and not rust. Don't use brick and mortar, that has too many weak points._

Concentrating hard, Aya began the slow process of building a new wall around his mind and merging it with his other shields.

* * *

_**The Koneko**_

Crawford studied a model of Saito's mansion on the lap top screen before looking up at the computer hackers. "Impressive. How much did it cost?"

Omi winced. "You really don't want to know. Kritiker asked for the best, however, so they'd better not complain."

"Besides," Nagi interrupted, his exhaustion overriding his usual good manners. "If Kritiker's getting as much as you said from this guy when he's dead, then they'll more than make up for it. Plus they'll get a **very** secure safe house out of the deal."

"Fine," Crawford said, looking back over the plans. "Why don't you tell me exactly what you've created?"

Omi turned the lap top so he could see and began his explanation. "Outside is fairly standard. Motion detectors set around the property's perimeter at knee level to avoid small animals setting them off and cameras everywhere. There's at least one in every blind spot and others on the bottom of the hanging plants. We've set the computer room here in the Koneko up to keep track of everything."

"The entrances and exits to the house all have silent alarms that will trigger everyone's cell phones if they're tripped." Nagi continued. "The windows and all the glass we could find are bullet resistant and the codes for everything are set on biometrics, which are almost impossible to bypass."

"The rest of the house," Omi added, "is filled with heat signature sensors, motion sensors…Saito doesn't have any pets, does he?" Crawford shook his head. "That's good. Anyways, there are also sound sensors and remote locking systems on **all** the doors."

"To make all of this work," Nagi finished, "everyone needs to have their cell phone with them at **all** times. Any and all alerts are going to be sent through the phones. The primary monitors and controls for all this are in the computer room, but we've set these PDAs up for access while we're in school...you're getting one too, by the way…and we don't need to worry about losing power since it's being routed in from another grid…and…and…"

"Enough," Crawford said. "This will be fine." He studied them both, making careful note of their wrinkled clothes and the dark circles under their eyes. "I suggest heading to bed early tonight. I'll deliver the plans to Kritiker. Get some rest, both of you," he finished sternly.

The boys nodded tiredly and shuffled from the room. Crawford pulled the lap top back to him, studying the plans again before shaking his head. Those two had outdone themselves. He ejected the CD the data was stored on and put it and the written notes into an envelope, making a mental note to get Kudoh to mail it the next day.

'With security **this** high,' Crawford thought, 'I just might be able to take Aya-chan to that matinee, after all…' With that happy thought, Crawford returned to his paperwork.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Done! Chapter finished at 2:32 am! Beta sends it back at 2:08 pm and story gets posted a little after 3! Pretty good considering we started this around 11:30 last night, neh?_

_An important thanks:_

_Thalia, thank you so much for coming up with the security plan for Saito mansion and helping with the various incidents in this chapter. We really couldn't have done it with out you._

_Now then, we would like to thank lonely-dreamlover and tigermink for reviewing chapter 11! Those reviews really make our day, especially when you think about how small the Weiss fandom really is. _

_This chapter is also part of a mini-arc. This one doesn't have a name, but it's a 3 chapter arc. Each chapter takes place over a week until we reach the end of the month. Isn't is nice that all these chapters are lining up so well? lol._

_To answer a few quick questions:_

_Aya learn of Brad and Aya's engagement in chapter 14, Trouble Squared (by the by, the name is part of a theme. If you look back at the previous chapter titles, you'll see what we're talking about)._

_And to clarify a minor point, when we said that the sequel Improbability Factor would have Aya/Schu pairing, that means Aya (formerly known as Ran) and Schu. Brad and Aya-chan will also be together in the sequel. Heh, we even have a vague inkling of what we could do to write a third story…havn't worked out too much about it yet, though._

_REVIEWER CHALLENGES!_

_REVIEWER CHALLENGES!_

_REVIEWER CHALLENGES!_

_1) When talk about a 'theme' in the naming of chapter 5 and 14, what does that mean? Or rather, what happens in one chapter that will happen in another chapter that's a part of that theme? It won't be identical, but it will be equally earthshaking._

_2) There are a few VERY small lines in this chapter that hints at things that will be revealed later. We've hinted at this before in chapter 5. Can you spot what we're talking about? If you get it, you will have a REALLY GOOD idea of what the sequel will be about! _

_Erm…'fraid that's all we have along the lines of Q and A and reviewer challenges. We hope you enjoyed!_


	14. Painting the Town Red

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Thirteen – Painting the Town Red**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**Saito Mansion**

Ken stifled a sigh as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. His respect for Crawford had shot up dramatically in the past week and a half. How had he managed to serve as Taketori's bodyguard for so long without murdering him? Ken's normally open and relaxed face was almost completely blank – though if you looked close enough, you could make out the growing lines of irritation and annoyance around his eyes.

Saito Tsuguo was an irritating, aggravating little worm whose continued existence was a mystery. How he'd managed to live 20 years without someone putting him out of him misery…

Ken groaned softly and concentrated on **un**clenching his hands. Once again, he'd found himself imagining what it would be like to drive his bagnucks into that little bug's wasted body. 'I really need to stop doing that,' Siberian thought wistfully. Saito was "entertaining". Several "friends" had stopped by the house to "see how he was doing".

'Yeah, right,' Ken thought. 'If any of these locusts are here for any reason except buttering up a potential source of wealth, then I'll give up soccer and join a BDSM club.'

His eyes strayed towards a nearby clock. 'Three more hours…three more hours of hell until Crawford takes over.'

* * *

**The Koneko**

'Three more hours of heaven until I have to take over guarding Saito,' Crawford thought mournfully. He and Aya-chan had taken full advantage of the sudden absence of any possible audience. The over protective brother and nosy telepath were miles away, Kudoh and Sakura were working in the shop, Farfarello was making deliveries, Ken was watching Saito and Omi and Nagi had left hours ago to try and find a valuable piece of software.

'Probably another computer game,' he thought lazily, stretching his back slightly. Aya-chan was sitting on his bed against the headboard, one hand holding a textbook and the other running through Brad's hair. Brad was sprawled out on the bed with his head in her lap.

"Aya," Brad said suddenly. The woman in question looked up from her textbook and then down at Brad. "What would you say to a dinner and a movie tomorrow night?"

She raised an eyebrow. "I'd say that sounds nice…if we can pull it off. Don't you have to escort Saito-san to that concert tomorrow night? The heavy metal one?"

Brad gave her a smug look. "Actually, Kudoh will be going." He looked up at her with innocent eyes. "He's been complaining so much about 'missing out on the action,' that I decided to let him take a turn with Saito. I don't want him to wander around feeling left out, now do I?"

Aya-chan started giggling, before bursting out laughing. "He'll hate you! He hates heavy metal!"

"Perhaps," Brad mused. "But at least he'll stop complaining."

Tossing her book on the floor, Aya-chan looped her arms loosely around Brad's neck and leaned back. "Ken and Farfarello's soccer team have their first game tomorrow, so they'll be out all night celebrating no matter what happens, Omi and Nagi are getting a new game tonight and will be too busy playing that to do anything and Yohji will be off with Saito." She gave him an amused look. "If I didn't know you so well, I'd suspect you of arranging that." The amused look turned wicked. "Since I **do** know you, I don't have to suspect anything! I know!"

* * *

**Next day, Villa Weiss**

'_Please let me in, Aya,'_ Schuldig begged. _'I really have to go…'_

Aya snarled. _'No way,'_ he snapped. _'Not after yesterday.'_

Schuldig banged his head against the doorframe. _'Look, yesterday was just one of those days where Farfie's demon spirit Murphy appears. We didn't stand a chance. We should be lucky that as much went right as it did!'_

Aya turned the water off with a hard twist that nearly pulled the handle from the wall and ripped a towel off the towel rack. Schuldig whimpered softly as his mind suddenly slammed into the wall Aya had thrown up around his mind.

'_Please, Aya, this is an emergency. I wouldn't be bothering you except it's raining outside and that squirrel's out there…'_

'_Absolutely not! Do I need to remind what happened yesterday whenever we were in the same room?'_

Schuldig cringed. _'I'm really sor-'_

'_Yes, you're sorry. You're always sorry! Why don't you just stop doing things that you'll have to apologize for later! For one thing, you can stop knocking me out of bed in the morning!'_

'_You're bed's too small,'_ Schuldig complained. _'And you're not strong enough yet to last out the entire night alone.'_

'_Do you really think excuses are going to save you?' _Aya wrapped the towel around his waist and jerked the door open. He gave the German a harsh _Shi-ne!_ glare before stalking towards his room to get dressed. Schuldig dove into the bathroom and slammed the door shut.

Schuldig glance over his shoulder as he leaned over the toilet. There was no way Aya was going to listen to him, not when he was in the middle of a temper tantrum. He gnawed on his lower lip as his mind flittered back to the previous day. It had started out innocently enough. The alarm had gone off, he'd turned it off and rolled over…knocked Aya out of the bed…

'It's not like I'm doing it on purpose,' he grumbled to himself. 'If the alarm was on **his** side of the bed, it would be **me** on the floor every other day.' He shook his head as he finished his business. 'There's a reason single beds are called **single**.'

His mind returned to the day before. Aya had picked himself up off the floor and disappeared to make breakfast with only a token growl. Schuldig had remained in bed, trying to sort out the confusing dreams he only vaguely remembered. 'Aya at Rosenkreuz. Yup, I've officially lost it.'

When he'd finally stumbled downstairs, he found himself facing a cup of tea and a cup of ramen. Coffee had been banned after the…blender incident and Aya was irked enough at being knocked out of bed that he'd neglected to make Schuldig anything to eat. Once done with his so-called breakfast, Schuldig had been banned to the shower while Aya cleaned up the kitchen.

'I told Crawford over and over again that we need a separate water heater for the shower! It's not my fault I used up half of it and Aya the other for the dishes!' Schuldig scowled at his reflection as he dried his hands. 'And we need more towels.'

That little moment had earned Schuldig the privilege of doing the day's laundry – starting with the towels he'd used up. 'Just because there aren't any clean towels doesn't mean he can't shower!' Schuldig pulled the door open and glanced out fearfully. 'At least our work on the shields went ok.'

More than ok, really. Aya's shields were developing faster than any he'd ever seen or heard of. His own shields were getting stronger. Something about Aya's mind was causing his own to react in a **most** unexpected manner. Not that he was complaining. The stronger they both got, the easier it would be to hold out against Rosenkreuz's best.

Schuldig carefully pried the door to his and Aya's room open. Aya was curled up on the bed with a book ignoring the rest of the world. After a moment's debate, Mastermind decided to leave the other telepath be. He wandered downstairs and threw himself down on the couch, carefully not looking at the kitchen.

There really wasn't anything he could do to make up for the day before. He'd tried to apologize earlier by making lunch. Aya had given him a careful look before agreeing. Call him crazy, but Schuldig was convinced that he'd seen something soften in those expressive eyes.

'I never knew grilled ham and cheese could catch fire like that.' Yup, it had been cups of ramen for lunch. Aya had turned the electricity off while Schuldig had put the fire out. They'd grabbed a quick bite to eat and three hours later, what few repairs they could manage on their own were done. Aya had claimed the first shower after grabbing a towel from the dryer. Luckily, the laundry had finished before the stove caught fire. If it hadn't, they probably would have been attacked by the bloody thing.

While Schuldig had taken his second shower of the day, Aya had grabbed a book and retired to the living room to read. Deciding that he couldn't go wrong with sitting on his hands and keeping his mouth shut, Schuldig had sat in silence trying to ignore the wet hair soaking his shirt and, somehow, managing to keep out of trouble.

An hour passed from the time the German emerged from the shower before Aya had calmed down enough to work on his shields a little more. They'd then proceeded to eat a wonderful dinner prepared by Abyssinian while Mastermind found himself sitting on his hands again at the table.

Schuldig threw a nasty glare towards the stairs. 'He asked me to clear the table. He **told me** 'Schuldig, clear the table and be quick about it.' He's just as much to blame for breaking the dishes as me!' Of course, all their leftovers had been ruined, as well…

'More ramen. Ick.'

Ramen was all they had left now. They were going to have to run to a grocers tomorrow. They wouldn't last long on just ramen.

Schuldig's eyes drifted shut as he remembered the final incident – the one that had gotten him banned from the bathroom…again. They'd decided to go to bed early. Somehow, in the course of brushing teeth, washing faces and brushing hair, Aya's toothbrush had flown through the air in a perfect arc and had landed in the toilet.

He still had bruises from landing hard when Abyssinian had literally thrown him out of the bathroom, over the arm chair and onto the coffee table.

* * *

Ken, Farfarello and Aya-chan stumbled out of Crawford's black Mercedes just as the owner of said car strode out of the Saito mansion with an irate look on his face. Aya-chan looked at him in alarm. She could practically see the steam coming out of his ears.

"Bad day?" She asked innocently.

"That…he…" Crawford's face had turned a frightening shade of red. He glanced at Ken and gave him a cruel smirk. "I do hope you'll enjoy yourself. Mr. Saito has been preparing himself for the concert for several hours now."

Ken paled. "Do I want to know what that means?"

"Oh, you'll find out soon enough." Crawford drawled. "Now get in there. Inform Mr. Saito that Korat is here for his physical. Farfarello, make sure that Mr. Saito prepares for his check-up _properly_."

Ken sighed and nodded as he trudged into the house with Farfarello trotting along at his side. Crawford waited for the pair to disappear into the house before turning to Aya-chan.

"If Saito gives you any trouble, tell Farfarello and he'll take care of it."

"I don't think he'll do anything," Aya-chan replied dryly. "Farfarello sits on the desk while I'm giving Saito his physical and just stares at him. Every now and then he starts licking his knives. Saito's rather scared of him, actually."

"Good," Brad grunted. "I'll wait here to drive you and Farfarello back to the Koneko."

"That's fine," Aya-chan said. "Are we still on for tonight?"

"Yes, we can discuss the particulars later," Brad replied.

* * *

**The Koneko**

Crawford slammed the phone down so hard it bounced out of its cradle and hit the floor. "Damn it!" he roared. He'd spent the past few hours arguing with their insurance agent over whether or not they had sent in the papers for the Koneko. 'Hmph,' he thought. 'Kudoh may be flaky at best, but I know for a **fact** that he got the forms sent.' He snarled again. 'How **dare** they lose those forms and try to blame **me**!' He gritted his teeth as he reached down to pick up the phone. This was going to take a while.

* * *

Aya-chan stared at her cell phone's screen in wide-eyed shock.

_-Why don't we just tell the whole world so we can just stop being so damned secretive!_

Her hands began to shake in fury. How dare he try and take his anger out on her! For a moment, her face twisted into a snarl that would have done her brother proud. She took a deep breath and began to count to ten…slowly…in Latin…She exhaled and picked up her phone once more to text her reply.

_-I do hope you'll remember that with 8 assassins in the house and Kritiker's financial backing, insurance isn't that big of a deal. Just send in the forms again and make it clear that you're doing **them** a favor._

Crawford bit his lip slightly in guilt as he looked at Aya-chan's calm reply. His speaker phone was playing the soft music that seemed standard for being put on hold. He'd been on the verge of tossing the machine out the window when Aya-chan had replied. It was ironic, actually. The music was supposed to put the customer into a very calm frame of mind, not drive the average listener to the edge of homicidal rage. He looked at the small cell once more before texting his own reply.

_-I didn't mean to snap, but these documents are part of our cover. We can't have people noticing that we don't have insurance. If something goes wrong, we'll be discovered._

Pursing her lips, Aya-chan replied.

_-I understand, dear, but you need to calm down. Take a deep breath. Now, let's talk about something else. Tonight?_

_-I'm going to kill the telephone…then the insurance agent…then set fire to their building. The damned music is still playing!_

_-Arson is never the answer, dear._

_-Yes, it is._

_-No, it isn't._

_-Is._

_-Brad…_

_-What!_

_-You're snapping again._

_-…_

_-Dear, about tonight. And if I get another snippy answer, we're calling it off._

_-Dear, can you come upstairs for a moment?_

_-Are you going to behave now?_

_-Yes, just get up here._

_-…_

_-Please?_

Aya-chan glanced over at Yohji, who was pretending to work on a difficult arrangement. "Brad's throwing a fit upstairs over the insurance papers. Someone needs to go calm him down."

"Have fun," Yohji said airily. There was no way he was going up there and risk getting yelled at about the insurance forms he'd sent off. "He won't get mad at you. Even Crawford's afraid of Aya in a rage."

Aya-chan giggled. "He is rather intimidating, isn't he?"

"Considering that his first instinct is to go stick the pointy end of his excessively sharp excuse for a steak knife into the nearest fleshy body, yes."

Laughing so hard she nearly fell over, Aya-chan staggered out the back door, through the storage room and up the stairs. She strolled over to Crawford's office and let herself in. "You rang," she asked, her eyes dancing.

Brad made a face at the pun and snapped a few words at the person at the other end of the phone before setting it back in its cradle.

"I see they took you off hold," she said.

"Yes," Brad replied with a sour look at the innocent phone. "They found the receipt that shows they did receive the documents. Unfortunately, the person who accepted them is out with a bad case of food poisoning…I'll give them _food poisoning_..." he added in an undertone.

"Dear, do we need to have another talk about keeping your assassin life and your business life separate? You can't keep killing people who annoy you."

"Why not."

"You'd have to shoot every living person on the planet, that's why."

Brad grumbled softly before pulling his wallet out of his back pocket. "Here," he said extending a black credit card. "Go buy whatever you'll need for tonight. I'll take care of the rest."

Aya-chan accepted the card with a raised eyebrow. "If you're giving me _this_card, then may I assume the restaurant will be slightly higher quality than usual?"

Brad gave her a bland look. "You are welcome to assume what ever you want. Make sure you're back before 5. That's when Kudoh leaves to escort Mr. Saito to the concert."

Aya-chan grinned. "Then I only have four hours to shop. I'd best get moving."

"Just don't max out the card…"

Aya-chan merely laughed as she sailed out the door.

* * *

Brad was straightening his tie when he heard Aya-chan descending the stairs. He turned…and lost the ability to form any coherent thought. She was wearing a flowing strapless white dress with embroidered blue flowers that swept across the bodice and down the side of the dress. Her face was framed by long diamond earrings and she wore a delicate sapphire pendent circled by diamonds with a matching bracelet. There was a hint of iridescent turquoise over each eye, making the deep blue of her eyes stand out.

Aya-chan blushed slightly at his stunned look. "I hope I haven't overdressed."

"Not-not at all," Brad stuttered, his eyes still wide.

Aya-chan gave him a patient look and patted him on the arm. "In that case, shouldn't we be going?"

His head jerked as he nodded. Extending his arm, he escorted her down the stairs to the waiting car.

* * *

**Villa Weiss**

Aya slowly walked down the stairs and peered at Schuldig. The German had fallen asleep on the couch, a slightly miserable look on his face. The younger of the two bit his lip, a feeling of guilt washing over him. He shouldn't have gotten so mad at him. It had been an accident, after all. That's all the previous day had been, one accident after another.

Creeping over to the couch, Aya bit his lip as he looked down at the German. Something about the German made him feel very guilty about the day before. A level of guilt that only Aya-chan and one cousin had ever achieved.

Schuldig woke slowly, vaguely aware of feelings of confusion and misery nearby. Feeling eyes on him, he continued to pretend that he was asleep as he tried to assess the situation.

'The only other person here is Aya, so it had to be Aya…' And if it was Aya and he learned that Schuldig was awake, pain and screaming would follow. And since he would notice that Schuldig was awake soon…it was time to wake up.

Shifting his weight slightly, Schuldig let his head roll to one side. _'What time is it…'_ he mumbled, careful to color the thought with feelings of drowsiness and contentment.

'_Late,'_ Aya replied after a moments pause. _'I…I wanted to apologize…for yesterday…and this morning. I shouldn't have lost my temper like that.'_

'_Oh, please. Like you didn't have reason.'_

'_That's no excuse,' _Aya insisted.

Schuldig snorted faintly as he rolled onto his side. Aya continued to look down at him as he spoke again. _'It's getting late…I guess we might as well go to bed.'_

'_Don' wanna move…'_

With a slight grimace, Aya glanced around and rose to grab one of the blankets on the bunk-bed tucked against the wall. _'I guess we could just sleep down here…the beds upstairs aren't any smaller.'_

'_That'd be hard,'_ was Schuldig's response. He tugged the redhead down onto the sofa next to him and pulled the blanket over their bodies. _'Sleep_…' he murmured as he wrapped an arm around Aya.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Don't hurt us…please? Real Life got in the way. Lady Raina and I have both been preparing for our first student recital of the year. Wish us luck? Anyways, on to the more important things. _

_We'd like to thank Lauren Ryan, tigermink and lonely dream-lover for your inspiring reviews! They do make us write faster, really. So keep 'em coming!_

_Now:_

_**Q:**_

"_very nice I really love the parts at the villa"_

_**A:**_

_We're glad you like it. Thalia, our beloved muse, has almost finished the floor plans for the Koneko and the Villa. Someday, we hope to put them up on the web. We are thinking about getting a DeviantArt account. What do you think?_

_**Q:**_

"_Poor schuschu he just wanted his coffee"_

_**A:**_

_Yup, all that work, all that suffering for coffee. Poor thing, we really are mean to him. But it will all work out in the end._

_**Q:**_

"_BTW, i've just noticed that you use 'ni-san'. I think the correct spelling would be 'nii-san'."_

_**A:**_

_And you would be correct. We'll do that from now on and, at some point, correct that in the previous chapters. Notice any other errors? Please let us know!_

**_REVIEWER ANSWERS!_**

**_REVIEWER ANSWERS!_**

**_REVIEWER ANSWERS!_**

**_1) When talking about a 'theme' in the naming of chapter 5 and 14, what does that mean? Or rather, what happens in one chapter that will happen in another chapter that's a part of that theme? It won't be identical, but it will be equally earthshaking._**

"_err... I didn't really understand this challenge but my guess is that (refering to Chaps 5 & 14) the theme would have something to do with revelation... since in chap 5, Ran learned he was telepathic, in chap 14, Ran would learn of Brad&Aya-chan's engagement."_

_Well done on getting it half right! We're not too surprised you didn't get it…it's not something we've ever seen before in another story, not the way we're doing it. The next chapter will have Ran learning of Brad and Aya-chan's relationship. How he does that…heh heh heh. Poor Brad. To be reduced to cowering behind Aya-chan for protection…_

_**2) There are a few VERY small lines in this chapter that hints at things that will be revealed later. We've hinted at this before in chapter 5. Can you spot what we're talking about? If you get it, you will have a REALLY GOOD idea of what the sequel will be about! **_

"_I had a pretty hard time with this one. This is just a wild guess but in chap 5, Brad mentioned that Schu 'must enjoy living dangerously'. Then in this chappie, it was revealed that Schu was trained by Rosenkreuz since he was a child. Since the sequel is going to be about Schu's and Aya's pasts, I guessed that must be it."_

_Very close! Closer than you realize! Keep thinking on it and look back over this chapter! There's another clue buried in there! We won't tell you yet, but if you guess it, you're getting a private email letting you know!_

_**REVIEWER CHALLENGES!**_

_**REVIEWER CHALLENGES!**_

_**REVIEWER CHALLENGES!**_

_1) I'm sure you've all guessed what this one will be: how does Aya/Ran find out about Brad and Aya-chan's relationship? Also: how will the others find out?_

_2) Our last challenges included this one, so here it is again, with a little more. There are a few small lines in this chapter that hints at things that will be revealed later. We've hinted at them before in chapter 5 and 11 and now this one. NEW HINT: The line we're referring to in this chapter is very similar to the one in chapter 5. It's not written the same, but the basic idea is there. Chapter 11's hint is even more subtle. It took Ptath a few moments to notice it…anyways, if you review with your thoughts, chapter 14 will tell you **who** is saying/thinking the hint winks._

_Stay tuned for Chapter 14: Trouble Squared!_


	15. Trouble Squared

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Fourteen – Trouble Squared**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**The Koneko**

Yohji sighed as he flipped through the new insurance forms. "Same as the past three times?" he asked.

"Yes," Crawford growled. "And if they lose _these_ forms, I'm going to have a little…talk…with our insurance company. Losing the forms once I can understand. _Three times_ is inexcusable!"

"You're telling me," Yohji said. "The migraine I got after the last trip to the post office only went away yesterday." He sighed again and stuffed the forms into an envelope. "I just hope there aren't any more crying babies. Those are the real killer."

"Fine, just get those off."

Yohji nodded and turned to leave when the door opened. A woman in a short red skirt and jacket smirked at the two men and held up a video.

"Congratulations," she said dryly. "The mission you've been asking about every other day has arrived."

Yohji's eyes lit up. "We get to kill Saito!"

* * *

Ken's eyes were narrow as he glanced suspiciously from Yohji, to Farfarello and to Crawford.

"This really isn't necessary," Oracle said impatiently. "I already know who's going to kill Mr. Saito."

"Yes, well, I don't think we should leave this in the hands of fate," Ken said heatedly. "We've all had to…suffer, so we should all have equal shots at killing that miserable little toad!"

Crawford groaned softly, resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose in an effort to stave off an impending headache. "Fine, just draw already," he snapped and extended a fist towards the tree assassins.

Ken looked at the three straws in Oracle's hand before drawing. His face fell when he saw that he'd picked a long straw. Yohji eyed Farfarello carefully. The Irish madman rolled his eye and gestured for Yohji to take his turn. Picking at random, Yohji drew, sighed and started digging into his pockets for his cigarettes and lighter.

"Have fun," he said to Farfarello. Berserker smirked and plucked the short straw left in Crawford's fist.

"Saito's existence hurts God…" he said, "but Saito makes Aya-chan nervous. Therefore he must die a sinner's death."

With that said, he turned and disappeared into the night, heading for Saito's mansion.

"That was almost…coherent…" Yohji said in surprise.

"Yes, Aya-chan seems to be having a good influence on him," Crawford said as he pulled off his glasses to clean them.

Inside the mansion, Farfarello was creeping up the stairs towards Saito's bedroom. He hoped their mark hadn't invited a 'friend' over to celebrate his twenty-first birthday. Killing an innocent woman would definitely upset Aya-chan and he didn't want to do anything that might upset the gentle girl.

Reaching the bedroom door, Berserker pressed his ear up against the wood, listening carefully for any sound within the dark room. After a long moment of silence, he pulled back with a nod of satisfaction.

Saito screamed as the door burst inwards. Standing on the other side of the ruined door was Farfarello. He was surrounded by light, looking like a fallen angel with his eye patch, scarred body and long, wicked knife.

"Wha-what are you doing?" Saito demanded in a high pitched voice. "I demand to know what you think you're doing! You're supposed to be protecting me, not destroying my house!"

"This isn't your house."

"What? Of course it is!" Saito snapped as his hands flailed about him looking for his clothes.

"This house belongs to Kritiker, now," the Irish man taunted. "This house, your other properties and all the money your family has ever made now belongs to Kritiker."

The young man on the bed was gibbering now, scrambling away from the assassin that was stalking towards him.

"You should never have said those things to her," Berserker hissed. "You made Aya-chan nervous and for that, you will suffer."

* * *

"Wan' 'nother one, Kenken?"

"Yeah…"

Aya-chan could only stare as Yohji carefully poured two more flutes of champaign and carried them over to Ken with exaggerated care.

"This will be the last one," Brad said softly.

"I would hope so," Aya-chan replied with wide eyes. "How many have they had?"

"Seven or eight," Brad said. "Ken's only had four of five, but he doesn't hold his liquor very well."

"Please tell me this isn't some weird assassin tradition."

"Pardon?"

"To have a party and get drunk after the completion of the first successful mission as a full team."

Brad gave Aya-chan an amused look. "Technically, we won't be a full team until Schuldig and your brother return." His lips quirked as Aya-chan whacked his arm. "And no, this isn't some 'weird assassin tradition.'"

"That's good. Nii-san doesn't hold his liquor very well. I've only seen him drunk once. He was coming home from a party and couldn't put one foot in front of the other. He was also rhyming…not talking, rhyming."

Brad snickered as he watched Ken slide under the dining room table. "Somehow, I can't picture Abyssinian…rhyming…"

"It one of those things you need to experience."

"I see."

Aya-chan stood up and began to pick up the used plates and glasses. Yohji beamed at her and held his glass into the air. "To you!" he exclaimed, knocking back the last of his drink. Without pause, his eyes rolled back in his head and he fell backwards onto the floor.

Aya-chan twirled the stem of the glass she had snatched away from the blond right before he passed out. "I appreciate the sentiment," she said gravely, "but I advise you not to repeat that around my brother."

* * *

Omi glanced up as Nagi returned from the bathroom. "Yohji passed out again?" he asked.

"Yes," Nagi said dryly. "And Ken joined him this time."

"Wonderful. So where does that leave us?"

"Yohji and Ken are both passed out in the dining room, Crawford and Aya-chan are cleaning up and will be going to bed soon," Nagi said slowly, a grin spreading across his face.

"In other words," Omi said, his own face lighting up, "we can play all night without interruption."

* * *

Brad's face was grave as he walked Aya-chan to her door and bent down to kiss her. Aya-chan looked at him in exasperation.

"I said I wouldn't marry you yet, not that I wouldn't sleep with you."

Brad jerked back in surprise. His mouth fell open and his eyes were wide.

"Ay-" he started, stopped, took a deep breath and continued. "Aya-chan, light of my life and joy of my existence, where did that come from?"

"Am I wrong?"

"No-YES! I mean…if you…I don't…" He took a deep breath. "If you wish to, then I am not adverse."

"Braaad."

"All right, fine, I would love to…take things to the next level…but what about your brother?"

"What about him?" Aya-chan asked feeling completely exasperated.

"Well, what if he finds out? It would be hard to have children if he's removed several important parts with a rusty spoon."

"I wasn't planning on telling him, were you?"

* * *

"Moshi moshi…Oh!...that sounds great! Let me ask Nagi," Omi covered the mouth of the phone with a hand and glanced over at the kinetic. "It's Sakura. She's been invited to a party at Honda-kun's house and wants to know if we want to go."

Nagi blinked once before nodding. "That could be fun. When is it?"

"About an hour from now. She says she can give us a ride."

Nagi pursed his lips. "We'll need to tell Crawford."

Omi grinned and uncovered the phone. "That sounds great, Sakura! We'll be ready in half an hour!" After hanging up the phone, the two boys ran up the stairs to change.

"I'll tell Crawford," Nagi said. Omi nodded and continued down the hallway to his room. He froze when he heard a man shout, a woman scream, Nagi scream and saw an antique Tiffany lamp fly through the air and slam into the wall. Throughout the house, glass could be heard exploding.

"Nagi," he cried in alarm and dashed for Crawford's room. He dove through the door, a dart clasped in each hand…and froze, eyes wide at the sight of clothes strewn about the room, Crawford sitting (shirtless) stunned and Aya-chan clutching a sheet to her chin.

Aya-chan pressed a hand to her wildly beating heart as she stared back at Nagi and Omi's stunned faces. When Farfarello ran through the door, she could only think of one thing. "Oh dear."

* * *

**Villa Weiss**

Schuldig dug through the fridge, searching for the carton of milk Aya needed to finish dessert. "Found it," he grunted. Straightening, he pushed the door shut with his foot and strolled over to the other telepath. Aya glanced over and reached out to take the milk. They both stiffened as a wave of _surprise-alarm-loss of control-shock-panic_ washed over them.

Aya's face had gone white. "Aya…" he breathed. And suddenly, they were gone.

* * *

**Koneko, Brad's room**

"Who needs to die?"

"Oh dear," Aya-chan said again, now looking at Farfarello. Before she could explain to the Irish man that no one needed to die, two new figures appeared in the room.

Brad stared at them in horror. "This just went _way_ beyond _oh dear_," he exclaimed as he dove behind Aya-chan.

Aya-chan looked up at her brother's darkening face and blazing eyes. "Nii-san, when did you get back?" she asked in a worried tone.

"Crawfooooorrrrdddddd," Abyssinian hissed.

Schuldig stared about himself in shock. How had they gotten from the Villa to the Koneko? That was over… "The beans!" he screamed. "The beans are still in the pressure cooker!"

Crawford stared up at the red face of Fujimiya Aya in fear. 'Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God.'

"What. Is. Going. ON. HERE!" Aya roared. "What the bloody hell do you think you're doing, Oracle!"

"It's not his fault, nii-san!" Aya-chan exclaimed. She pushed Brad up against the headboard, planting herself directly in front of him in an effort to protect him from her brother's wrath. "I propositioned him!"

"Oh," Farfarello said as he relaxed. Around him, a collective "WHAT!" echoed through the room.

"The beans…" Schuldig whimpered. "The Villa is going to burn down…" his face brightened suddenly. "And it's not my fault! It's Brad's!" He grinned down at the cowering figure of Oracle of Schwarz.

"Nii-san, I can explain, really," Aya-chan was pleading.

"What, exactly, is there to explain?" Aya hissed.

"Oh God, oh God, why didn't I see this, oh God, I'm going to die, why oh why didn't I see this? Oh God," Brad was chanting.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_He He He. Sorry but I feel like being evil. I hope you liked this chapter and I promise the next will come soon. (end of week) In the mean time Comments are appreciated and flames will be used to roast marshmellows._

_Lady Raina _

_I wonder if you enjoyed reading that as much as we enjoyed planning it and writing it? Ah, yes, answer will be forthcoming in the next chapter, which, by the by, has already been written. Lady Raina is going to a choir competition next weekend and we (Ptath, Lady Raina and Thalia) were having so much fun with this that we simply had to keep going._

_StormDancer and Artemis1000, thanks for you great reviews! Yes, the bathroom scene was good, hold music is evil and the end was very sweet (things are definitely progressing on **that** front). _

_We hope the 'big revelation' met everyone's standards! The 'theme' we've mentioned in previous author notes…well, it'll be explained in the next chapter. We'll go over it then. _

_Hmm, well, I guess we really don't have too much to say. The chapter certainly speaks for itself. _

_We hoped you enjoyed! The next chapter will be up next weekend without delay!_

_**REVIEWER CHALLENGE! UPDATED! AS PROMISED! BIG REVEAL!**_

_1) There were a few small lines in the last chapter that hinted at things to come. We've hinted at them before in chapter 5 and 11 and now in chapter 13 (note: go by OUR chapter numbers, not FFN's. Don't forget about the chapter 7 preview!). _

_NEW HINT: The line we're referring to in chapter 13 is very similar to the one in chapter 5. It's not written the same, but the basic idea is there. Chapter 11's hint is even more subtle. _

_NEW HINT: the person who keeps thinking these hints is Schuldig. Can you find them? The chapter are (once again) Please Tell Me You're Joking, Return of the Dead One and Painting the Town Red._


	16. The Devil's Nightmare

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Fifteen – The Devil's Nightmare**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**The Koneko, 4 am.**

Yohji whimpered softly at the stabbing pain concentrated behind his left eye. 'I shouldn't have drunk so much last night,' he thought with a cringe of pain. Taking a deep breath, he shifted his weight slightly to see how mobile he was. He blinked when his hands brushed over shards of glass.

His head tilted backwards towards the ruined china cabinet. He then looked at Ken's unconscious form under the table. He was covered in glass shards. 'That…that means that I…I must have broken the cabinet!' Panic rising quickly, Yohji squeezed his eyes shut. 'If Crawford finds out, I'm going to have post office duty for a year!'

"I WILL NOT CALM DOWN!"

"Fine, I'll just finish my milk."

What the…

While the sound of Aya screaming at the top of his lungs was not unusual, something about it was setting off bells and whistles in his head. Mindful of the glass, he carefully levered himself up and staggered over to the doorway.

"Finally awake?" Omi asked from where he and Nagi sat at the small round table in the dining room. They each had a laptop and a large bowl of chocolate ice cream. The horror of what they had seen had resulted in the need for comfort food.

"I don't suppose you'd care to tell me why you left broken glass all over the floor if you were up." Yohji sighed and looked around for a clock. "What time is it anyways?"

Omi gave Nagi a swift glance before looking back at the hung-over assassin. "It's four o'clock in the morning, Yotan."

"…"

"We've been kinda busy…"

"I swear, I didn't hurt her! I barely even touched her!"

Yohji stared at the kitchen. That had sounded like…Crawford? Running a hand through his blonde hair, he gave Omi and Nagi a pleading glance. "Care to let me in on…"

Wait a minute.

Brain finally kicking in, Yohji spun around and lunged at the table. "What day is it!" he begged frantically. "It takes hours to get from the Villa to the Koneko! What day is it? How long have we been asleep?"

Nagi gave him a matter-of-fact look as he answered. "You've only been unconscious for a few hours. It's still the same day you passed out."

Yohji collapsed in a nearby chair. "That's not possible." His green eyes were wild as he began to nervously search his rumpled clothes for a cigarette. "It's physically impossible to get from the Villa to here in that short a time." Finding a stray cigarette perched behind his ear, he lit it with shaking hands. "Just how long are your 'few hours'?"

"Sun will be up in another hour or two."

Yohji's hands began to shake again.

Suddenly, a loud bang! echoed through the room. Everyone jumped and the voices in the kitchen silenced for a moment before rising once more. A faint whimper floated out from under the table.

"Why is everyone shouting?" Ken moaned as he clutched his head. He blinked suddenly. "Wait, when did Aya get here? Weren't he and Schuldig at the Villa?" He paused again. "Do I want to know why I'm covered in glass?"

Yohji gave Ken an offended look. How could his brain be functioning that fast with both a hangover and the new goose-egg he'd gotten from hitting the table as he sat up?

"That's my fault, Ken," Nagi said apologetically. "I lost control of my powers when…when…" His face paled dramatically and his eyes seemed to glaze over. Omi quickly leaned over and shoved a large spoonful of ice cream in his mouth.

"Try not to think about it, it'll just make it worse," he said in a mournful tone.

Yohji rested an aching head on one hand as he watched Ken carefully stagger out from under the table. He carefully began to review everything he'd learned since awakening.

Aya had somehow crossed a large distance in an impossibly short period of time.

If his ears were working properly, then he'd heard Schuldig talking about milk earlier.

Aya was screaming at someone.

Crawford had been swearing that he hadn't hurt or touched someone.

Crawford had sounded scared.

He'd used the word 'her'.

The only 'her' in the Koneko was Aya-chan.

Yohji now had a pretty good idea why Aya was screaming at Crawford.

Nagi and Omi had seen something that had driven them both to ice cream.

They seemed to be traumatized by what they had seen.

What they had seen had caused Nagi to lose control of his power and destroy the china cabinet and everything in it.

His head **really** hurt.

Yohji tilted his head to one side. That was a really long list…He sighed and cast another look at Nagi and Omi. Nope, not going to get anything out of them. Ken would be even more useless, so his only hope of finding out why he'd been awakened at four o'clock in the morning was to brave the lion's den.

A look of determination on his face, Yohji staggered to his feet and began to walk towards the kitchen.

* * *

Aya-chan glared daggers at her brother as she drew herself up. "Nii-san, leave Brad alone! If you're going to get mad at anyone, then you should be getting mad at me!"

Aya gave her a sharp look. "You stay out of it. I'm not sure Crawford has completely grasped the severity of the situation. Once I'm through with Crawford, though, we will be having a discussion about this."

Storm clouds were gathering above Aya-chan's head. Her eyes blazing, she stuck her finger in her brother's face and shook it. "You have no right to tell me what I can and cannot do! This is my life, not yours! If this is what I want, then you should be supporting me, not yelling at me! That's what the brother I remember would do!"

Aya's head snapped back like he'd been struck. His violet eyes had gone wide in astonishment.

"You do realize," Aya-chan continued, narrowing her eyes, "that you can't keep me locked away in a glass tower forever?" Aya-chan gave her brother a scornful look. "You are not Dad, and I will not let you stand in the way of my happiness. You will not scare this one away."

Aya's face was a frightening shade of grey. Aya-chan glared again. "I don't think we can accomplish anything at the moment. I'm going to bed." With that, she swept out of the room.

Yohji stared after her as she stalked up the stairs. He'd stopped just outside the kitchen when he'd heard Aya-chan yelling at her brother and now he was at a loss for what to do next. Going into the kitchen after that little speech would spell certain death, but how was he going to find out what was going on?

Peaking back into the kitchen, Yohji could see that Schuldig was eyeing Aya with alarm. The temperamental redhead was slowly turning towards Brad, who stood on the other side of the island.

"This is all your fault!" Abyssinian hissed. "How dare you corrupt my sister, you sleazy, arrogant, overdressed American!" For a moment it looked like he was going to leap over the island and throttle the stunned looking Oracle. "Americans," he sneered. "You always think you can just waltz in and take whatever you want. Well, here's one thing you can't have!"

Having said his piece, Aya stalked from the kitchen. Schuldig quickly tossed down an empty carton of milk and ran after him. Crawford snarled at the redhead's back and strode to his office, slamming the door behind him.

Gathering his wits as best he could, Yohji slowly entered the kitchen and opened a cabinet to get some painkillers for his aching head. After swallowing a few pills, he turned to face Farfarello, who had watched the entire argument silently from his place next to the pantry.

"I know I'm going to regret asking this," the blond said carefully, "but what the hell is going on?"

* * *

Omi, Nagi and Ken could only stare in open mouthed shock as first Aya-chan fled from the kitchen and ran upstairs, Aya and Schuldig went downstairs and drove off (presumably in Aya's Porsche) and Crawford stalked into his office slamming the door behind him.

"Well," Omi said after a moment. The three assassins jumped when a sudden knocking was heard from downstairs. They stared at each other for a moment before Ken spoke up.

"Is that…is someone at the door?"

Nagi pulled his laptop closer and pulled up the camera feed of the door in question. "It's Sakura!" he exclaimed in surprise.

Omi covered his mouth with his hand. "That's right, we were supposed to go to a party!"

Nagi gave him a sickened look. "You don't think she's been waiting there all night, do you?"

"No," Omi said after a moment, "she told us to call her when we were ready."

The knocking was heard again.

Ken glanced at the other two with bleary eyes. "Someone needs to go get that…" he murmured.

For a moment, no one moved. Finally, Omi sighed and got to his feet.

When the door opened, Sakura was surprised to see Omi staring at her with wild eyes and a bowl of ice cream in one hand.

"Now really isn't a good time," he pleaded.

"That's not hard to tell," she replied. "Aya almost ran me over a few minutes ago!" She paused, an odd look flitting across her face. "When did he get back? I thought he and Schuldig were on vacation?"

"I'm really not too sure when they got back," Omi admitted. "And I'm not sure I want to know." He gave her a slightly guilty look. "I know we were supposed to call, but…something…came up…"

Sakura looked at him in alarm as his eyes glazed over slightly before he gave himself a small shake.

"Anyways," he finally continued. "We'll try to explain what's going on later. It would be best if you went on home."

Sakura nodded slowly, worry creeping into her gaze as she slowly turned and walked away.

Behind her, Omi sighed once more and pushed the door shut. He turned and leaned against it for a moment, surveying the dark garage. Aya's Porsche was gone. He shook his head and slowly trudged up the stairs.

"Just the person I wanted to see!" Yohji exclaimed when Omi appeared on the second floor. The teenager gave him a sickly look.

"What do you want?"

"That's not very friendly," the older blonde drawled. "What I want is to know what's going on. All I got from Farfarello was, and I quote, 'Things went boom, but Aya-chan said is was her fault, so that made it all ok. But Aya still wanted to kill Crawford and Schuldig kept talking about beans.' Needless to say, I thought I would come hear your version of events."

* * *

Aya-chan sniffled into her pillow, trying to ignore the sounds of people moving around the Koneko. She raised her head when someone softly knocked. After a moment, she rolled off her bed and slowly walked over to the door. Pulling it open, she was surprised to see Yohji standing on the other side.

"I finally found out what happened," he said as he leaned on the doorframe. "It only took three of four tries," he added with a wry shake of his head. His face suddenly turned sober. "Are you going to be ok?" he asked.

Aya-chan stepped into her room to let the lanky assassin in. She shut the door and gave him a miserable look. "I scared Nagi into destroying most of our glassware, he and Omi can't bear to look at Brad and me, I got into a fight with my brother and said things I shouldn't have. Do you really think things are just going to turn out 'ok'?"

"Your brother may be harsh, temperamental and a bit on the violent side," Yohji said gently, "but he does love you. He'll come around. Just give him some time. After all, he's only known Crawford as something besides an enemy for two months."

Aya-chan sighed and nodded slowly. "I suppose you're right."

"Of course I'm right! I'm the great Kudoh Yohji, after all! I'm always right!"

Aya-chan burst out laughing.

* * *

**Villa Weiss, several hours later**

Deliberately ignoring the outside world, Schuldig concentrated on prying his hand off the door handle. After the harsh argument in the Koneko, Aya had headed straight for his car. The German had barely gotten in the car when the younger telepath had roared out of the garage. It didn't take long to see why the rest of Weiss tried so hard to avoid riding in the same car as the redhead. The man drove like a bloody maniac. It was a miracle they hadn't been pulled over for speeding and even more of a miracle that they hadn't ended up in a ditch. All Schuldig had been able to do during the hellish ride was clutch at the door handle and pray. Finally freeing his hand, he climbed out of the car, trying to ignore his creaking limbs.

Aya could only stare at the blackened frame of the Villa with dismay. "Looks like the beans went boom after all," Schuldig commented as he walked up behind the other assassin. "Good thing we didn't bring too much up with us." He glanced around. "Looks like the squirrel survived…" he muttered.

Aya groaned softly and sat down hard on the hood of his car. "What am I going to do?"

"Well, I was just going to shoot it, but if you have another idea, I'd love to hear it."

Schuldig grinned at the dark glare. "There really isn't too much you can do," he said calmly. "She's just as stubborn as you and she's female. The best way to get her to do something is to tell her not to do it. Like it or not, she's gunna end up with Brad." He shook his head in bemusement. "Who'd think he'd finally settle down? With his former enemy's sister, no less." Giving the other man a sideways look, he continued. "She's been good for him."

Aya reviewed the past two months in his head carefully before nodding slowly. "I guess so." He sighed again and stuck his hands in his pockets.

Grinning, Schuldig wrapped an arm around Aya's narrow shoulders. "The fun part is going to be keeping those two apart until the wedding. Normally I'd say that that wouldn't be a problem, but after last night…" he laughed as Aya's eyes narrowed once more. "Tell you what," he said as his grin widened. "I'll make you a bet. I bet you Crawford and Aya-chan won't be able to keep their hands off each other before the wedding and will end up in bed together."

Aya gave him a sharp look. A flicker of amusement filled his eyes. "You aren't giving Aya-chan enough credit." He suddenly smirked. "I'll take that bet. And if I win, then I get to pick your outfit for the wedding."

"Oh really," growled the German as Aya tossed him visions of himself in a frilly pink suit. "If I win, then you have to do what I say for a week. Without complaining or hitting!" he added.

The two telepaths shook on it to seal the deal. "And remember," Schuldig added, a look of glee on his face. "You'll have to do **anything** I say."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	17. Fleece and other Fluffy Things

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Sixteen – Fleece and Other Fluffy Things**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

Aya-chan gave her brother a defiant look as he handed her the last of the dinner dishes to wash. He and Schuldig had returned to the Koneko around eleven to report that the Villa had indeed burned down. 'Good thing no one had anything at the Villa…well, except for nii-san and Schu,' she thought. 'And what they lost won't be too hard to replace.'

The loss of the Villa was, as she saw it, a great opportunity. With nine people and four bedrooms, the old Villa could never have held the combined teams of Weiss and Schwarz. Now they could plan a new mountain retreat from scratch!

In a much better mood than before, Aya-chan finished loading the dishwasher and started wiping down the counters. She paused when she heard the distinctive sound of high heals on the stairs. Giving the counter one last swipe, Aya-chan tossed the cleaning rag into the sink and hurried to alert the assassin teams to the arrival of a Kritiker agent.

* * *

Manx took her usual place next to the large television and looked out over the men draped over the couches. "Schatten," she began, "you have…" she blinked suddenly and looked back at the long couch. "Abyssinian? Mastermind? What are you doing here?"

Schuldig gave her a casual grin as he draped an arm over Aya's shoulders. "Funny story, that," he drawled. "Let's just say that we need a new Villa."

"They got here early this morning," Omi said quickly, giving the German a swift glance. "Really early. Before sunrise, actually." He hesitated for a moment, a look of indecision flitting across his face before he continued. "Aya and Schu were at the Villa when Aya got a feeling that something was wrong. Not that anything was wrong!" he added hastily. "But it was a strong enough feeling and sudden enough that Aya…well…he teleported to the Koneko."

"The beans," Schuldig whispered mournfully.

"The Villa burned down," Nagi said bluntly from the other side of the room. "Aya and Schuldig didn't get a chance to turn off a pressure cooker and it exploded."

Manx looked from Nagi to Omi and then to Schuldig and Aya sitting at the end of the long couch. Resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of her nose, she quickly ran Omi's statement through her mind and latched onto the pertinent facts. "Teleported?"

"It's a rare ability," Crawford stated calmly from his throne-like chair in front of the TV. "Almost as rare as someone possessing more than one psychic ability."

Manx sighed softly. "And this ability will take more time to train? On top of developing the necessary shielding Abyssinian needs to protect his mind?"

"Yes and no," Crawford answered ignoring the heated look Aya shot him. "Mastermind has informed me that Abyssinian's shields can be completed here. Teleportation is not a difficult skill, so that too can be trained at the Koneko."

"Aya being a telepath will make it even easier," Nagi interjected. "At Rosenkreuz, teleporters receive much of the same training as telekinetics. The only real danger is teleporting into something. As a telepath, Aya will be able to use another person's mind as a way of ensuring that he doesn't reappear half inside a desk or something."

"Fine," Manx said briskly. "Schatten, your new mission is for tonight."

"It's already night," Yohji interrupted.

"Cram it, Balinese," Manx snapped. "All Schatten has to do is kill another assassin."

"I have plans!"

Manx pointed a finger at Yohji. "If you say another word, I will remove your reason for **making** plans!" Yohji blanched as he crossed his legs. Satisfied that there would be no further objections, she continued. "One of Kritiker's agents is the key witness in bringing down a Yakuza boss. He'll be testifying tomorrow. Naturally, the Yakuza want him silenced and Kritiker has learned that their assassin will be making his final attempt tonight."

She held up four folders. "I don't think it will take eight people to take down one third-rate assassin, so who's in?"

"I am," Aya said firmly.

Schuldig sighed softly and raised his own hand. "Where Aya goes, I go."

'_I do not need a babysitter!'_ Aya snarled silently.

'_But we have no idea how you'll react to actually killing someone with your telepathic abilities active. A small mission like this is the best way to get a handle on your reaction.'_

Aya glared at Schuldig as he conceded his point.

"Farfarello, you'll be going as well," Crawford pronounced. The Irish man looked up with a bright gleam in his eye. "Nagi, you'll go along to take care of any technical matters and to rein in Berserker if the need should arise."

"I doubt it," Nagi said thoughtfully as he floated the folders to the necessary people. Farfarello's went to Crawford. "Farf has been getting better lately, without needing medication."

"Very well then," Manx said calmly. "Schatten, deny this dark beast his tomorrow!"

* * *

Yohji trudged up the stairs after a most unsatisfying night. Running into his date's old boyfriend had been moderately bad. Discovering that his date was not, in fact, a she at all had been extremely bad. He groaned softly as he reached the third floor. The only good to come out of this night was former-date and old-flame hooking back up with the mistaken belief that he'd set them up so that they could hook back up. Life wasn't fair.

As he crept past Aya and Schuldig's door, he noticed a faint light in the crack of the door. Looks like the would-be assassin had been taken care of. He sighed again. At least something had gone right tonight.

* * *

Aya crossed his arms as he glared at Schuldig. '_We are not at the Villa. We have a double bed, not a twin. You will stay on **your** side of the bed and that's that.'_

Schuldig rolled his eyes. '_I find it very interesting that you suddenly object to my presence the moment we're around other people. You didn't give a damn before if I was on my side of the bed or not. Hell, half the time, you were the one cuddling up next to me!'_

"I do not cuddle!"

* * *

Yohji froze just as he was about to close his door. Had he really heard Aya…

Obviously, further investigation was required. Good thing he'd been an investigator.

Experience had taught the blonde that listening at doors was not only a good way to get caught, but also extremely difficult. Instead, he walked over to the blank wall next to his chest-of-drawers and pressed his ear up to the wall.

"You're going to wake everyone up if you keep yelling like that," Schuldig hissed.

Yohji didn't need to see Aya to feel the glare their leader gave the German.

"You're not having second thoughts, are you? About our bet?"

"Of course not," Aya snapped.

"I think you are. I think-"

"You thought? Perhaps miracles do happen."

"Shut up. I'm not letting you back out. In fact, I'll up the stakes."

"Oh? And how do you intend to do that?"

"If I win and Crawford and Aya-chan do end up in bed together before the wedding, then we're going on a month long cruise and as long as we're on the boat, you're mine."

Aya hissed. "Apparently miracles don't happen. Aya-chan and Crawford will not do anything before the wedding. That's a fact. Once you see that I'm right, you won't just be wearing that pink suit to the wedding. You'll be clubbing in it for a month."

Yohji's eyes went wide. Schuldig…in a pink suit? Aya on a cruise? He didn't know which was worse. 'Aya said wedding. The wedding,' Yohji suddenly realized. 'That means he doesn't object to Crawford and Aya-chan dating!' A grin suddenly crept over his face. This had potential.

After an hour's wait, he decided that they should be asleep and scrambled out of bed. Quickly (and quietly), the blonde dashed to Crawford's room. He knocked softly and waited for a response. At first, there was no answer. He knocked again, louder this time. Finally, the door was wrenched open to reveal a rumpled and irate looking Oracle.

Yohji grinned. "You're not gunna be mad once you hear what I just found out."

"What could you have possibly learned during your nightly bar crawls?"

"Come to Aya-chan's room and you'll find out."

Crawford's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean by that?" he asked ominously.

"Oh, you'll see."

Crawford gave the shorter man a sharp look before nodding slowly. "This had better be worth it."

* * *

Aya-chan hugged her pillow to her chest, her eyes drooping. Brad was sprawled out next to her looking at Yohji expectantly. He was grinning widely and bouncing from foot to foot.

"You're not going to believe what I just heard," the blonde began, his eyes glowing with mischief. "Your brother and Schuldig have made a bet. If Schuldig wins, he and Aya are going on a month-long cruise."

Aya-chan looked at him with wide eyes. "But nii-san gets seasick!"

"Yes, well, that's just another reason we want Aya to win. You see," Yohji continued, "if your brother wins, then Schuldig has to wear a pink suit to the wedding **and** out clubbing for a month!"

Brad felt his eyes narrow. "What wedding," he demanded.

"Why, yours and Aya-chan's, of course!" Yohji felt his grin widen even farther at their stunned looks. "The bet, you see, is whether or not you two will sleep together before the wedding. Schuldig says yes and Aya says no."

For a moment, Crawford could only sit stunned. Then, an evil, sadistic smirk slid over his face. "Well, I think we should start looking for a good tailor."

As Yohji looked at the matching gleam in Crawford and Aya-chan's eyes, he made a mental note to never, ever get on their bad side.

* * *

The next afternoon found Aya and Schuldig napping quietly in their room after a short night and the rest of Schatten in the TV room down the hall. Omi, Nagi, Ken and Farfarello were playing a racing game while Yohji, Crawford and Aya-chan were playing poker on the coffee table. Aya-chan had a small mountain of chips in front of her. Yohji and Crawford were down to a handful each.

Yohji leaned over towards Crawford. "I thought you could see the future," he hissed. "You didn't see your girlfriend taking us to the cleaners? Fix this!"

"I'm trying," Brad hissed back as he antied up for another round.

Yohji sighed as he tossed his own chip in while Aya-chan looked at them in amusement. "So," he said as he looked at his hand (3 of hearts, 9 of diamonds, 2 of clubs, Jack of hearts and the 7 of spades) "did Aya teach you to play?" He tossed down four cards, holding onto the Jack and picked up his new cards (2 of hearts, 4 of clubs, 7 of hearts and the 5 of diamonds. It wasn't supposed to get worse…).

"No, our cousin did," Aya-chan replied as she studied her own hand (Queen of clubs, Ace of clubs, King of Clubs, 10 of clubs and 4 of diamonds). "He's a bit on the wild side and always did his best to drag us down to his level. He usually succeeded, too." She pursed her lips and discarded the 4.

"Oh? Does your brother have the same level of ability you have?" Brad asked. He looked at his hand. He was holding the 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6 of spades. A straight flush.

"Actually, he's not very good at cards," Aya-chan said as she put Yohji's cards on the discard pile. The blonde had folded and had now buried his head in his arms. His two remaining chips glinted mockingly at him from the table. "Pool, now," she continued, "he's deadly at pool."

"I think I can see that," Brad mused as he looked at his cards once more. After a moment's debate, he pushed his last remaining chips into the pot. He had a straight flush, after all.

Aya-chan studied her hand once more and looked at her boyfriend. "Are you sure about that?"

"Of course," Brad said with narrowed eyes.

"Are you sure you're sure?"

"I'm always sure," he said, glasses glinting.

"What ever you say then, dear." She then proceeded to push her entire mountain of chips into the pot. Crawford went white. "Call."

After eyeing her a moment, Brad laid down his cards one by one. "2 of spades, 3 of spades, 4 of spades, 5 of spades and the 6 of spades."

Yohji's head shot up. "A straight flush," he whispered, eyes brightening. "There's hope!"

Aya-chan looked at his cards, nodding thoughtfully before laying down her own hand.

Yohji's head hit the table with a solid crack. Brad looked at the cards in disgust. "That's not right…"

"I take it she had a good hand?" Ken inquired.

"A Royal Flush," Yohji moaned. "A fucking Royal Flush. The 10, Jack, Queen, King and Ace of Clubs."

"I started out with the 4 of diamonds, but luckily, I drew the Jack when it was my turn to draw." Yohji glared at the girl who was now piling up all but two of the poker chips.

"I give up," he muttered and threw himself to the ground. The ceiling was actually rather interesting, he noticed. All those swirls and dots…it was a wonder he'd never noticed it before. Of course, he'd never been fleeced by a girl seven years younger than him…it was shameful, really.

"Toma was a really good teacher," Aya-chan said glibly. "At cards, at least. After a few weeks of practice, even he couldn't beat nii-san at pool."

"He sounds like a bad influence," Brad muttered.

"It wasn't all bad. I mean, all those times he and nii-san cut school…it wasn't like they were going to a bar or anything."

That statement got attention. For a moment Brad was reminded of an American office term…_prarie-dogging_.

"Tell the story," Nagi said bluntly.

Aya-chan giggled softly before beginning. "They collected comic books, American ones. DC? Umm, Batman for nii-san and Superman for Toma, I think. And the only store that carried them was several hours away by train and they couldn't get to it in time after school, so they would cut school every now and then to get new comics."

Brad shook his head. "They cut school for comics? DC comics?" He snorted softly. "Please. If it had been for Marvel comics, that I could understand. But DC?"

Nagi stared at Crawford incredulously. "What do you know about comics?"

Brad gave the telekinetic a superior look. "Clearly the X-men comics, published by Marvel I might add, were superior to both Superman and Batman."

As the four gamers wondered what universe they had stumbled into, Yohji could only shake his head. "Schuldig is going to die when he learns the he missed this conversation."

"If he cut school for comics as a teenager, then what did he do when he was a kid?" Nagi wondered out loud.

Aya-chan froze, her laughing eyes going flat. Her spine had gone stiff and her mouth tight. The air in the room went frigid.

"I wouldn't know," she snapped as she sprang to her feet. "And you'll not ask him about it, is that understood?" Schatten could only stare in shock and fear as a glare capable of burning holes into adamantium pierced them.

"Aya-chan," Crawford started as he rose to his feet to follow, "wait, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong!"

"Aya…" Crawford murmured. His eyes were filled with concern.

"My brother is Aya. When he was 15 he was Ran. Before that, we don't know who he was," she said in a tight voice. "I found him in the park when I was 13. He was more than half dead and his body was seeping blood. It was a miracle he survived the trip to the hospital and when he woke up, all he could remember was the name Ran." Her eyes went cold. "He can't remember anything from before he was 15, so you won't ask him about it, is that understood?"

Before anyone could reply, she stormed out of the room.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	18. Secrets Revealed

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Seventeen – Secrets Revealed**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

"_Aya…" Crawford murmured._

"_My brother is Aya. When he was 15 he was Ran. Before that, we don't know who he was," she said in a tight voice. "I found him in the park when I was 13. He was more than half dead and his body was seeping blood. It was a miracle he survived the trip to the hospital and when he woke up, all he could remember was the name Ran." Her eyes went cold. "He can't remember anything from before he was 15, so you won't ask him about it, is that understood?"_

Crawford shook his head sharply, trying to dislodge Aya-chan's stunning revelation out of his head. Aya…Abyssinian…was adopted? It did explain a few things, the man's hair and eye color, impossible for a Japanese man, and yet…

How could he have missed this? How had Rosenkreuz missed this? And Aya-chan…how could he have missed seeing her explode like that? Aya-chan was the most important person in his life, so how could he not see her getting so upset. A sudden knock on the door shook him from his thoughts.

"Enter," he said grimly.

Nagi stuck his head in. "Got a moment?"

Brad looked at the teenager in surprise before nodding.

Prodigy slipped into the room and sat down in front of Crawford's desk. "I wanted to talk to you about your visions."

Crawford felt his eyebrows shoot up. He'd just been wondering about them… "What about them?" he asked calmly.

"I've noticed a…rather disturbing trend," the teenager said carefully. "The first time was the night the dishwasher exploded and you signed us up with Kritiker. You didn't see the kitchen being destroyed. Then you didn't see yourself getting a sprained wrist and several broken ribs. You didn't see that Aya's telepathic powers would activate. There was the stairs incident; you didn't see the Saito mission being extended. You definitely didn't see that Aya would turn out to be a teleporter as well as a telepath and I don't think you saw Aya-chan flipping out like that earlier."

Crawford closed his eyes. Those were the biggest…lack of visions, yes. He'd also noticed that the hints he usually got when conducting various business matters were waning and he found himself being surprised by the world in general far more than he ever had.

"I've noticed that myself," he finally said, keeping his tone even. "The truly important visions, Weiss's return, who got to kill Saito and the way a mission should be executed; those have come without interference, but still…"

As his voice trailed off, Crawford could feel a headache building. Fate had chosen now for all the questions to arise. Questions like why were his visions failing, who was Aya, why had he been so badly injured when his adopted sister had found him and why hadn't he noticed any of this until now?

Shaking his head once more in an effort to derail a train of thought, Crawford focused on Nagi once again. "Nothing I learned in Rosenkreuz deals with anything like this situation. We're going to need information if we're to find out what's going on and why."

Nagi looked at him in obvious alarm. "You don't mean…"

"Hack into Rosenkreuz's mainframe. Look for anything about blocking someone's powers, blocking visions or psychics with unusual powers." Crawford looked at Nagi grimly. "Between you and Omi, you should be able to hide your trail, but be careful. It's obvious we can't rely on my visions to give us warning of danger."

Nagi bit his lip and nodded slightly. As he rose, his hand darted out to brush Crawford's hand and then he left.

* * *

**The Koneko, next day**

Aya-chan trudged up the stairs, fresh from class and eager for lunch. As she walked towards the kitchen, a flash of red caught her eye. Turning, she saw her brother sitting in one of the soft chairs in the sitting room, an open book in his lap as he stared out the window. She hesitated for a moment before darting into the kitchen.

* * *

Aya blinked as a sandwich suddenly appeared in front of him. He quickly realized that the sandwich was sitting on a plate that was being held by a smooth, slender arm. Following the arm, he looked into his sister's face and took the plate.

"Yohji thinks it's odd that I'm so hungry after class," she said absently as she sat down in another chair with her own lunch. "Of course, that might be because the last time it came up, we were dissecting cats."

Aya gave her an amused look. "I think I can see how that would be off-putting."

Aya-chan looked at her brother carefully. "What were you thinking about?"

He glanced over at her before transferring his gaze towards the window. "The past few months. They've been…interesting."

Giggling, Aya-chan gave him an amused look. "I'll say. Do you realize that you've only been back for three months?"

"I know. Eight months before that the Elders of Esset fell." Aya shook his head. "It's still hard to believe sometimes that we're working with the people who tried so hard to kill us." Then, in an even softer voice, he added, "it's even harder to believe that we trust them."

Aya-chan looked at him sympathetically. "Look at it this way: Brad and I have been dating for almost 10 months now."

"And now you're thinking about getting married."

She shrugged. "Lots of the girls I know get married after only 3 or 4 months."

Aya felt his face twist slightly. "I know…it's just…"

"You weren't here to see it," she said softly. She bit her lip, her fingers twisting the ring she only now dared wear openly. "Brad asked me to marry him several months ago, actually. He did agree, though," she continued as she ignored her brother's startled look. "He did agree that we should wait for you to come back. Before getting married, I mean."

"Good."

Aya-chan giggled. "You need to stop being such a bear about this," she stated grandly. "We're getting married whether you like it or not. And if you don't like it," she added with an arch look, "then I'll ask Yohji to give me away and not you."

"Brat," Aya said in obvious amusement.

"I'm not the brat, Toma is. At least, according to Brad and Yohji," Aya-chan said merrily. "I totally whipped them last night at poker. I had a Royal Flush to Yohji's…nothing and Brad's straight flush. All we need is a pool table and the Fujimiya family will rule supreme!"

"Yes, dear, but you cheat."

"Oh, you're no fun," she pouted.

"I'm not the card shark."

"Hmph." Aya-chan finished off her sandwich and glanced at her watch. 11:30. Plenty of time before her shift. "We talked about more than just Toma last night," she said finally.

Aya gave her a wary look. "What do you mean? If you told them about the pink tennis shoes…"

"The pink…oh!" Aya-chan started giggling again. "No, I've kept quiet about them. Might have accidentally mentioned them in passing once, but that's it." Ignoring the quiet oaths her brother was muttering, Aya-chan's mood turned sober once more. "No, what we talked about…well…it's just sort of slipped out..."

As she continued to hesitate, Aya tentatively reached out with his mind to brush against hers, feeling the _sunlight-yellow-teasing_ feel that was his sister's mind. Feeling his touch, she opened her mind, letting him see the memory of the explosion the day before.

"It's not a big deal," he said softly, trying to soothe the doubt and apprehension that filled his sister's mind. "I should have told them myself." When the worry failed to leave her mind, he reached over and grasped her chin firmly, turning her face towards his. "It's alright," he repeated, letting her _feel_ the truth in his words.

Slowly, she began to relax until she finally gave him a solemn nod. Pulling her into his lap, Aya wrapped his arms around her in a reassuring hug. "It's alright," he whispered. "I'm not ashamed of it. You're the only reason I'm alive today. You had just as much right to tell them as I did."

Aya-chan wrapped her arms around him, holding him tight, letting the love and affection she felt for her adopted brother wash over them both. They sat there for several minutes, not moving and not caring about the world around them.

Schuldig wandered in, taking in the silent tableau and, showing an unusual amount of tact, merely gathered the dirty dishes and took them into the kitchen.

As they listened to the German's footsteps fade away, Aya-chan finally began to extract herself from her brother's arms. "Yohji will need to get up in a few minutes if he's going to be on time to work."

Aya felt a smirk slide across his face. "I'd tolerate Schwarz's presence for no other reason than that they've taught Kudoh to take 15 minutes showers. Fortunately," he continued, his eyes drifting towards the German who was singing loudly (and very off key) in the kitchen, "I've found other reasons to trust them."

* * *

**Takahashi Ichiro High School**

"Tell me again what's going on?" Omi asked plaintively. His head was spinning and he wanted it to stop. Right now.

Nagi took a deep breath before starting over. "Crawford's visions have been on the fritz for the past few months. And it's getting worse. We need to get into Rosenkreuz's mainframe and see if they have any information that might help us."

"Great," Omi sighed. "All right, what will we be up against?"

"Besides psychotic maniacs out for blood and revenge?" Nagi asked wryly. "At least five or six firewalls, two or three guardian programs plus the deepest level of encryption ever conceived by Man. And if they catch us, we'll be lucky if we die in the first three days."

The older of the two students gave the other a sour look. "You're just full of optimism, happiness and cheer, aren't you?"

"I know what we're up against," Nagi said shortly, his mind drifting back to the few hellish weeks he'd attended Rosenkreuz's "school". Giving himself a slight shake, he pushed past the dark memories and focused on the mission at hand. "All right, we're going to need to prepare this extremely carefully."

"Two or three decoy signals, at least," Omi said thoughtfully.

"And at least one will need to look wireless by bouncing it off of several satellites," Nagi added. "If we scramble it, it'll look more important…"

"And we can route the others through several servers while sending the real signal through an old manual switch station," Omi finished. The two hackers grinned at each other.

"The manual server will slow us down, but it's almost impossible to trace," Nagi mused, "and that's exactly what we need right now."

"We'll need to augment the real signal," Omi began, "we don't want to be followed."

"And we'll need to find a place for a backdoor if we can," Nagi added. "The most remote spot on a hard drive that can be found."

"System upkeep, probably," Omi said pursing his lips. He gave the other hacker a sideways look. "You think we can do this?"

Nagi gave him a level look. "I think we need to do it. Brad is counting on us."

* * *

**Koneko**

Brad glanced up as the door to his office flew open. Aya-chan was carefully maneuvering an overflowing tray into the room. Rising, he walked over and pulled the tray from her hands and set it down on an empty corner of his desk. "Not that I'm not happy to see you," he began, "but didn't your shift start a few minutes ago?"

Aya-chan waved his concern away. "There's no way I'm opening the Koneko alone. Even with the fangirls in school, we get a big crowd after lunch."

"Kudoh's not slacking again, is he?"

"No, nothing like that," the young woman dismissed. "He's just gotten a bit of a slow start today." She gave him a pointed look. "Everyone was up rather late last night, after all."

Brad blinked for a moment, recalling the incident from the day before. "Ah, yes, about that," he began.

"Don't worry," she reassured him. "Nii-san and I talked about it a half an hour or so ago and it's all fine.

"Fine? As I recall, your definitions of 'fine' and 'oh dear' are a bit vague. Just how 'fine' are we?"

"We're perfectly fine!" Aya-chan exclaimed. "We had a hugging session and everything!"

Brad pinched the bridge of his nose. That wasn't exactly useful. Or specific, really. What next?

Sudden wild, hysterical screaming answered that question.

* * *

Schuldig wrapped a towel around the trembling (and very wet) form of Fujimiya Aya. The only thing running through the smaller man's head at the moment was that he never, ever wanted to see Kudoh naked again. Ever.

"How exactly did you manage to miss that much?" he asked curiously. Aya blinked, gave himself a small shake, then glared daggers at the German. "I mean, you were aiming for the TV room. Last time I checked, it didn't have a shower in it."

"And when was the last time you teleported anywhere," the swordsman hissed.

"Why, just a few nights ago, remember?"

Aya growled and slammed a sharp elbow into Schuldig's vulnerable stomach.

"Scheisse!" Giving the other man a nasty look, the German rubbed his now aching stomach with one hand. "You should get a permit for those, or something…I'm going to have go buy some Kevlar so we can find out what's stronger: your elbows or bullet proof vests!"

"He started thinking about you in pink." Aya cast a sly glance at the other telepath. "It seems I'm not the only one who thinks that that's definitely your color."

"Remind me to put something in his coffee later…" Schuldig grumbled. He sighed and dropped another towel on the other telepath's head. "You are getting better, though. If you can just take us back to our room, I think we can call today's training session finished."

Within seconds, they were gone.

* * *

**Next day**

Crawford strode into the dark computer room and carefully picked his way through the paper covered floor until he came up behind the two hackers. They were leaning back in their chairs, staring at each other with wide eyes.

"I take it you found something?" he asked dryly. They both jumped.

Nagi glanced up with wild eyes and Omi had a hand to his chest. "Don't do that!" the younger of the two exclaimed.

"Forgive me for making all the noise of a drunken, roller skating elephant in my arrival. I shall endeavor to make more noise next time I enter."

Omi gave the Schwarz leader a disapproving frown. "Nobody likes a smart ass."

Crawford merely glared.

Nagi leaned towards his computer and hit a few keys. With a soft hum, the projector screen rolled out of the ceiling. Omi punched a few of his keys and a document suddenly flashed on. "We found this."

"After," Nagi added, "doing a keyword Google search, searching the private files of various public companies and institutions and finally in Rosenkreuz's mainframe itself."

"We were hoping you could explain," Omi added.

As Crawford stared at the projection, a chill ran up his spine.

WARNING – WARNING –WARNING

SUBJECT: MASTERMIND; SUBJECT: MAELSTROM

TALENTS MASTERMIND AND MAELSTROM ARE UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES TO BE ALLOWED PHYSICAL OR MENTAL CONTACT FOR THE REASONS AS FOLLOWS:

THEFT, ARSON, VANDALISM, HARRASMENT, USE OF EXPLOSIVE DEVICES, MENTAL MANIPULATION OF OTHER STUDENTS, MENTAL MANIPULATION OF ROSENKREUZ OFFICALS, ASSUALT, ASSUALT WITH A DEADLY WEAPON, ATTEMPTED ASSASSINATION OF POTENTIAL PSYCHICS, ATTEMPTED ASSASSINATION OF ROSENKREUZ AND ESSET OFFICALS, PERMANENT DAMAGE INFLICTED ON PSYCHICS (PHYSICAL AND MENTAL).

THE COMBINED FORCE THESE TALENTS EXHIBIT EXCEEDS ROSENKREUZ'S CONTROL. TAKE ALL POSSIBLE PRECAUTIONS NECESSARY WHEN RESTRAINING THESE TALENTS.

SUBJECT: MAYHEM

MAYHEM IS THE CODENAME GIVEN TO THE MASTERMIND/MAELSTROM MERGE. MAYHEM IS CONSIDERED TOO POWERFUL FOR THE CONTINUED SAFETY OF ROSENKREUZ AND ESSET.

SUBJECT: MAYHEM; STATUS: TERMINATED

SUBJECT: MASTERMIND; STATUS: MISSING – TREASON

SUBJECT: MAELSTROM; STATUS: MISSING, PRESUMED DEAD

"We pulled this out of Schuldig's file," Omi said softly. "And it wasn't directly linked, either. Someone wants to keep this buried."

"Do you know who Maelstrom is, or rather, was?" Nagi asked hopefully.

Crawford blinked, trying to tear his eyes away from the (rather impressive) display on the projector screen. "No, but this can't be good."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	19. Interrogation and Intimidation

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Eighteen – Interrogation and Intimidation**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

"And then," the young woman stuttered, "then they started talking about the ring!"

Manx blinked in confusion. "Ring? What ring?"

"The smuggling ring, they're hiding it in the company somehow." The secretary looked at the red-haired woman in fear. "I didn't dare listen any further. I'm not sure what they would have done if they had realized that I had overheard them."

"You did just fine, Mika," Manx said soothingly. "I'll take it from here. Now, take a deep breath and start from the beginning."

Mika took a deep breath and started over. "You remember when I got the new secretarial job at Kuruma, the new car company?" she asked anxiously. "Well, I realized that I'd forgotten some paperwork, so I swung back into the office to pick it up. I was walking past one of the board rooms when I heard voices talking about forged American money and passports. I froze for a moment and when I realized that they were talking about a smuggling operation…" her voice trailed off and she shuddered softly. "I left immediately. I didn't know what else to do …"

Manx patted the young woman's hand. "It's alright, Mika." Her mind began to spin. "You go back to work tomorrow and don't worry about a thing. I'll take care of everything."

* * *

**Koneko, briefing room**

"The mission is as follows," Manx said crisply as the last members of Schatten drifted into the room. "Various members of Kuruma have started a smuggling ring of forged American money and passports. We know that some of the members of the board are involved, but we're not sure who."

"So how are we going to get all the info?" Ken asked curiously.

"Simple," Manx said dryly. "Oracle is going in undercover. One of the department heads has had a, ah, sudden family emergency. We're fairly certain that he's in on the ring and were hoping that Mastermind and Abyssinian could talk with him before he has to, ah, leave town."

"So you've kidnapped a high-ranking member of a respectable company with the intention of forcibly interrogating him," Yohji drawled with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't forget that we're also inserting a spy with falsified records," Schuldig added with a wide grin.

Crawford shot them a warning look.

Manx flicked an eyebrow at them. "Basically, yes," she said. "'While Oracle is away, Abyssinian will be taking over as leader of Schatten. As for the rest of the mission, we'll have further details later." She paused for a moment. "Are there any other concerns?" Looking out at the thoughtful faces of Schatten, she felt a warm glow of satisfaction. The assassins had made it through a complete mission briefing without delivering any outbursts, shocks or near-death experiences.

"Actually," Brad began.

It wasn't fair.

"My visions have become a bit … less reliable as of late," he admitted. "Major visions have not yet been affected, but day-to-day life and … other incidents," he said, eyes flicking over towards Aya-chan's calm figure. "Other incidents, some fairly important, have evaded my Sight."

The collective eyes of Schatten and Manx had gone wide. Before they could inquire further, another voice rose with another concern.

"Then there's that warning we found," Nagi said thoughtfully. "The one about Maelstrom."

"Maelstrom?" Schuldig asked in surprise. "Who the hell is Maelstrom?"

Omi gave him a startled look. "We found it in your file," he said slowly. "It was quite specific. You and Maelstrom were to be kept apart at all costs." The young hacker gave the telepath a startled look. "I was going to ask you about him … her … whatever," he finally finished.

"Sorry, kid," the German said with a frown. "Doesn't ring any bells."

Silence filled the room. Farfarello glanced around casually. "What happened to Manx?"

* * *

**Koneko, Brad's office, next day**

"And here are the order forms for the new shipments of flowers. They'll need to go in by next Wednesday at the latest. Make sure the inventory is kept up to date-"

"You do remember that we managed to run the Koneko just fine for two years without you, don't you?"

Brad didn't seem to hear Aya's dry comment.

"Farfarello may seem to be stabilizing, but he still needs to be taking his medication everyday. Nagi may need help with some of his literature homework. And make sure he and Omi don't fall behind. A mission is no reason to fall behind on school work. Yohji needs careful supervision to make sure that he gets up on time-"

"Brad."

"And if that damned insurance company calls again, you can tell them to shove those bloody forms up their-"

"Don't you think your overdoing things a bit?"

Brad let out a sharp breath and gave the red haired man an almost sheepish look. "Having someone competent to take over while I'm gone is a new experience."

* * *

**Kritiker headquarters, Interrogation Room, Next Day**

Yohji rocked his head from side to side, stretching the muscles as best he could. Taking a deep breath and marshalling his thoughts, he opened the door to the interrogation room. Inside was Nanba Haru, head of Public Relations for Kuruma. Unseen by Nanba, on the other side of the two-way mirror, were Schuldig and Aya.

"So," Yohji began, "you are … Nanba Haru, head of public relations?"

"Who the hell are you?" snarled Nanba.

"A concerned private citizen," Yohji replied airily. He picked a manila file off the desk and started to flip through it. "Ah, yes, here you are." He shot the unwilling informant an amused look. "My, my, so **you're** the one responsible for the 18 percent drop in sales last quarter. Can't imagine your employers being too happy about that. Still," he continued, ignoring the outraged sputtering from the other side of the table. "Maybe you should consider a transfer to another department."

"Listen, you," Nanba snapped. "I don't know who you are or how you got me here, but let me tell you this. If I'm not home in twenty-four hours, my family **will** call the police and they will come down **so hard** on you that you won't know …"

"Please, sir," Yohji said, holding up a hand. "It's mainly because of your family that you're here. We recently became aware of the smuggling ring the higher-ups in Kuruma have started. We're also aware that you're assisting them only because they are threatening your family. We're offering to protect you and your loved ones until the ring is broken."

* * *

'_Well, this is boring_.'

Aya swatted Schuldig's arm. '_Will you pay attention?_' he snapped.

'_Sheesh_,' the German muttered. '_We're really not picking up that much. I mean, not much more than we already kn-'_

'_There!' _Aya hissed suddenly. _'Yohji, there. Keeping following that line, he's trying not to think about the conspirators!'_

In the other room, Yohji twitched slightly at the sudden yell.

'_So, we gunna start working in the Koneko again?' _Schuldig asked as he stretched an arm over Aya's shoulders.

'_Of course,'_ Aya replied. He slid sideways and the German's arm fell. _'The Koneko is doing extremely well and if we don't go back to work, Crawford will have to hire someone new to assist.'_

'_Gotcha. Hey, Blondie! His daughter's sixth birthday is coming up. Use that.'_

'_Hmm. By the way, you wouldn't happen to know how three loads of laundry turned pink yesterday?'_

A blanch flickered across Schuldig's face. _'Er, no, not at all.'_

'_Hmm.'_

'_You might want to ask Far. He loves pink.'_

'_True. I'm fairly certain that he isn't allowed to do laundry, though.'_

'_Yes, very odd,' _Schuldig responded nervously.

At that Aya 'hmm-ed' under his breath and returned his attention to the interrogation on the other side of the mirror. Kudoh, he noted, was actually doing a fairly decent job of drawing Nanba to talk about what they needed to know. But still …

Yohji continued to concentrate on the squirming man in front of him. It was obvious that Nanba Haru wanted to protect his family a great deal, but he was still feeling loyalty to Kuruma that made questioning him difficult. Aya and Schuldig shouting at him every few seconds certainly didn't help.

'_He wants to build a house, his dream house,'_ Aya suddenly said.

'_He doesn't have the money for it, not while he's tied up in the smuggling ring,'_ Schuldig finished.

Yohji suppressed a flicker of irritation. As he listened to Nanba speak, he casually flipped one of the papers from the file over and scrawled something on the back. Then he casually stood up and leaned against the mirror, pinning the paper to the glass with his back.

Aya and Schuldig blinked. In front of them was the sign Yohji had written:

**STOP SHOUTING AT ME!**

**

* * *

**

**Koneko**

Nagi knocked on the door to Crawford's office, several files floating behind him.

'_Enter.'_

"I pulled all the info we've found so far on clairvoyance on the Rosenkreuz database together," Nagi said as he entered the room. "Want to take a look?"

"Of course," Aya said in surprise. As the large files landed carefully on his desk, the telepath's eyes widened. "This is more than I was expecting," he said carefully. "And there will be more?"

"Yes," Nagi replied. "There are a few files that we haven't been able to crack. And after that we're going to pull anything else that could be useful."

"That's quite a task you and Omi have set for yourselves," Aya murmured as he flipped through one of the files. He hesitated a moment before gesturing for Nagi to sit.

There was a moment of awkward silence before Nagi spoke up.

"So, how's … the training going?"

"Oh … fine. Still having a bit of trouble getting to areas I haven't been to before or where there isn't another mind to home in on."

Nagi blinked in surprise before perking up slightly. "I think I might be able to help you with that, actually."

* * *

**Kuruma Office, Next day 3:15 pm **

"Need some help?" a voice suddenly asked.

Brad glanced up, his heart rate spiking slightly. Resisting the childish urge to hide the folders he held behind his back, he turned and faced the door to the file room. "Just looking for some stats from last quarter," he said calmly.

"I hear ya," the man replied. He strode into the room and stuck his hand out. "Hyogo Jiro, er, Jiro Hyogo," he corrected blushing lightly. "That's how you American's say it, yes?" he added hopefully.

"Yes," Brad said with a faint trace of amusement. "Brad Crawford. Crawford Brad, according to Japanese custom."

Jiro beamed at the precog, shaking his hand vigorously. "So, Crawford, you're here as the new head of public relations?"

"Yes," was Brad's careful reply. "I'm here to fill in for Nanba while he's away."

Jiro grinned again. "Nanba, nice guy. Real family man. Hope he gets back soon." A look of horror flickered across his face. "Not that I'm not glad to meet you, Crawford, it's just that Nanba's a good friend."

"Quite alright, Hyogo," Brad said reassuringly.

"Oh, good," Jiro said brightly. "Say, a bunch of us are having dinner together tonight. Care to join us?"

"Er," Brad hesitated a moment, silently cursing Manx, "I'm afraid I already have plans for this evening."

"Ooo," Jiro cooed, "hot date?" He grinned at the dark glare Brad threw at him. "So, who is she?"

"Kitada Hanae," Brad said carefully. "She's a secretary at the police station."

Jiro punched Brad's shoulder lightly. "Dude, way to go! You scored a secretary!"

* * *

**6:30 pm**

"That's everything we have so far," Manx said as she pushed a thick folder across the table. "The boys are still digging, but the ball's in your court now."

"I see," Brad said as he placed a hand over the folder. The two agents had finished a quiet dinner and were lingering over coffee and dessert. "I'm afraid I'll have to be going now," he said signaling the waiter to pick up their check. "I'm going to need a head start if I'm to get through this and finish the work for the office before midnight."

"Of course," Manx said lightly. She watched as Brad signed the check and gathered his belongings to leave. "What," she said mischievously as he rose, "not going to kiss me goodbye?"

Brad gave her a slightly incredulous look. After placing the folder Manx had given him in his briefcase, he bent down and gave the red-haired woman a soft kiss. "I'll be sure to mention this to Kudoh," he murmured, a faint smirk on his face. "I'm sure he'll be very interested."

* * *

**12:15 am**

The sleek black car pulled to a stop in front of a rundown looking house in a bad part of town. Surveying it with critical eyes, Oracle's mind flickered to the phone call that had initiated this meeting.

"_Mr. Crawford," a deep voice growled over the telephone, "We know about your little … problem, as well as why you were sent to Japan and not some other employee. If you don't want your new co-workers to find out about your secret, I suggest getting into the black sedan that will be pulling up to your apartment in ten minutes. You will get into the car calmly and without alarm. They will deliver you where you need to go."_

Popping the door to the sedan open, the leader of Schatten climbed out and headed for the front door with an air of annoyance surrounding him. As he neared the entrance, the door swung open, light spilling onto the concrete.

"Please join us, Mr. Crawford," a voice rumbled from further inside the house.

* * *

**3:00 am**

Brad collapsed onto the bed in his spacious apartment, trying to shake the chill running down his spine. During his preparations for filling in as head of public relations, he'd been exposed to a number of press conferences, interviews and speeches. The voice that had beckoned him into the house, that had scolded him for his alleged gambling addiction and misconduct back in the States and threatened him into assisting the smugglers … he'd heard that voice before.

Rolling onto his side, he snagged the laptop that rested on the nightstand next to his bed.

_To: Fujimiya-at-koneko-dot-net _

_From: Crawford__-at-koneko-dot-net_

_ To: new commission_

_Have made contact with head of smuggling ring. Ring is far, far bigger than originally suspected. Automotive branch involved, housing, biotech, financial services, communications, marine vehicles and forestation branches involved. More branches likely involved. Ring is headed by the Vice-President of Kuruma **GLOBAL**. Am uncertain if taking out VP will end ring. May require assistance from other Kritiker units._

_

* * *

_

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at_


	20. Death and Destruction

**Total Mayhem: Chapter 19 – Death and Destruction**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Silver Rayne_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**Koneko briefing room**

"A problem has arisen with our latest mission," Aya said flatly as he looked out over Schatten from where he sat on the throne … chair. Schuldig snorted softly next to him on the arm of the chair.

"That's a major understatement if I've ever heard one," the German said sarcastically. "Brad's banging on the door calling for help and you say that we have a problem?"

"He's **what?**" Yohji gasped, his spine stiffening and eyes widening.

"He was approached by the head of the smuggling ring like we hoped he would be," Aya continued as he ignored the outbursts around him. "He discovered that this ring is far larger than we had anticipated. The vice-president of Kuruma Global is currently in control of the ring and has involved at least seven branches of this company."

A stunned silence filled the room.

"Hm," Nagi said finally. "Definitely a problem."

There was even more silence before Omi spoke.

"Does Kritiker expect us to handle this on our own? I mean," he stuttered slightly, "if it's as big as you say …"

"Anybody got any ideas how to fix this one?" Ken asked plaintively.

"That's what this meeting is about." Aya looked over the group, the barest hints of worry filling his eyes. "Crawford is going to continue gathering information, but we need to start putting together some sort of plan that will get Oracle out, take out the targets and not cripple the company."

"So we're supposed to play God and perform a miracle?" Farfarello asked quizzically. "I suppose that could hurt God …" he said slowly.

"Next thing you know, they'll be wanting us to turn water into wine," Schuldig muttered.

"I'm not opposed to that," was Yohji's bland response.

Aya was starting to understand why Manx had been leaving mission briefings at a dead run lately. He lowered his head to his hands, concentrating on taking deep, even breaths. Schuldig glanced down at him, biting his lip.

"Crawford's in trouble," he said slowly.

"Yes, he's in a great deal of trouble," was Aya's muffled response. "This could very well end in his death."

The slightly humorous mood quickly evaporated.

"Right," Ken said, determined to drag the conversation back to the mission. "What exactly do we need to start working out?"

* * *

**Brad's Apartment, 2 weeks later, 5 a.m.**

Brad lay still in his bed, trying to ignore the incessant beeping of his alarm clock. After trying to balance his 'job' at Kuruma and his work with the smuggling ring for two weeks straight, all he wanted was a full night's rest. No more coming home at 7, a short meal and hours of work sorting out what ships were best suited for smuggling for every ship in the world. Just one night of uninterrupted sleep.

Finally, he sighed softly and rolled onto his side to turn off the alarm clock. As he rose to his feet, his body tensed slightly, the strongest vision he'd had in months slamming into him.

_A man was strapped to a table, screaming. A doctor loomed over him, a sadistic grin on his face as he cut open the man's stomach._

_A woman was lying in a bed, staring at the ceiling with blank eyes._

_A dark figure stood behind a bound man, yelling at him, demanding he tell the truth._

_A man was sitting in front of a TV, the same images flashing over and over again._

_A man was carelessly throttling his wife, the bodies of his children lying around him in a pool of blood._

_A woman shot the body of her former commander over and over again, maniacal laughter filling the room._

_A man was typing furiously at a computer, page after page of classified documents spewing out of the printer, pages that were gathered and delivered to a dark figure standing in the shadows._

_A woman stood proudly in front of a large group of dark figures as another banged a gavel on a podium._

_A man joined a group of dark figures._

_Men and women alike were tortured, brainwashed and sold over and over again to the dark forces of the world. It happened over and over and over-_

Brad gasped as he wrenched his mind from the vision. Before he could get the wild beating of his heart under control, another vision ripped through him.

_He was bound to a chair, a dark figure standing behind him, yelling at him._

_He was staring at a television with glazed eyes._

_The bodies of Schatten, Kritiker and Aya-chan lay at his feet as he calmly reloaded his gun._

_The doors of Esset headquarters slammed shut behind him as he strode forward in a glorious return-_

The alarm clock flew through the air, slamming into a wall as Brad jerked violently, the sheets beneath him soaked with sweat and his hands trembled as his breath came in gasps.

That was it.

The true purpose of the smuggling ring had been revealed, as well as who was involved.

He reached for the phone. Work would have to wait.

* * *

**New Villa, later that day**

Brad put his car in park and sat there for a moment. Outside, Schuldig and Aya were sitting on the hood of Aya's Porsche. Manx leaned against her discreet Toyota, a slight frown on her face. Taking a deep breath, Brad stepped out of the car.

"I take back that email," he said calmly as he approached the others. "The ring will not be a problem."

"Why don't I like the sound of that?" Schuldig asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Because the real threat is what the ring is hiding, what lies beneath."

Schuldig groaned and let his head fall into his hands.

"What is it," Manx said, her voice tight.

"They're a service industry for the darker sides of humanity. Specifically," Brad continued in a tight voice, "they provide brainwashed assassins, spies and intelligence agents from around the world to various terrorist organizations and organized crime syndicates…those that are willing to pay the price, of course."

"How many," Aya asked, a line of worry appearing on his forehead.

Brad gave him a sour look. "It would be easier to name who isn't on the list. Any organization you can think of is a customer, including Esset."

The others looked at him in horror.

"Nice to know our former masters remain in good company," Schuldig muttered unhappily. "So how do we take something that big down without pissing off every snot-nosed thug and would-be martyr in the world?"

"Very carefully," Brad said grimly.

"We find out exactly who needs to be taken out and who needs to disappear," Aya said, his voice cutting through them like steel.

* * *

**Next Day**

Brad stretched his legs out under the table of the posh Italian restaurant he and several Kuruma employees were dining at. His overly enthusiastic co-worker Hiyogo Jiro had proven extremely useful in setting him up with the 'right' people.

He was currently dining with Maeda Taro, head of Information/Communications; Tanaka Ringo of Biotechnology and Kinjo Zinan of New Business Enterprises. His earlier visions had shown him that these men were involved with the smuggling ring and the brainwashing operation. Schuldig, seated at the bar, was patiently sliding through their minds, sharing their thoughts in an effort to learn just how deep the corruption went and the small, crucial details of the operation's power structure.

* * *

"So you see," Manx continued smoothly, "a small donation to the police commission ball could make those pesky little parking tickets disappear." 

"Of course, Ms. Hanoe," replied the head of Kuruma's Finance department, "such a gesture would be quite, ah, forgiving of the police force."

"It would be our pleasure, Mr. Nakamura," Manx smiled. "I'm sure you can see how paying for the ball and your tickets is really quite similar. All it does is eliminate that endless paperwork."

"Naturally," Nakamura replied.

The two smiled their fake smiles, clinking their glasses together to seal the deal. Unnoticed by Nakamura, Manx's eyes flickered over Aya's still figure, tucked into a dark corner of the café pretending to read a book.

* * *

**Later that Night**

Brad ushered Manx into the room with a hand on the small of her back. The bell boy bowed slightly after setting their luggage on the luggage rack. "Please call the front desk if you need anything," he said smoothly, "and congratulations on your engagement."

"Thank you," Brad said, struggling to keep his irritation from creeping into his voice. "We'll do that."

The bell boy bowed again and left the room. Seconds later, Aya appeared with Farfarello, Ken and Nagi in tow. Manx jumped slightly.

"You might want to get used to that," Nagi said dryly. "Aya seems to enjoy surprising people. Yohji's started showering while he's asleep. There were a few, ah, incidents."

"Shut up," Yohji muttered. Aya had reappeared once more with the rest of Schatten…just in time to hear Nagi's matter-of-fact comment. Nagi looked unrepentant. Aya merely smirked slightly.

Schuldig gave Brad a careful once-over. "You look like hell," he said bluntly.

"Try doing my job and see if you can keep up that pretty-boy look."

Ken muffled a snicker at Schuldig's gobsmacked expression.

Farfarello laughed. "He thinks he's you," he said in amusement to Aya.

"Knock it off," Manx said briskly. "We don't have much time."

"I thought this was the honeymoon suite. Don't we have all night?" Yohji asked with a leer.

Manx looked up, death in her eyes as she began to stalk towards the blonde. Omi jumped in front of her with a panicked expression. "Why don't we get started," he said frantically.

Even as he spoke, Crawford reached out and snagged her wrist. "We'll kill him later," he said calmly. "For now, there's work that needs to be done."

"Fine," she snarled. "We're framing the American Mafia. I hope you all remember how to fire a gun."

"We're giving Far a gun?" Nagi asked in alarm.

"I can use a gun!"

Omi looked at the Irish man with wide eyes. "I'm pretty sure that's not the issue."

Aya gave them all a sour look before directing his gaze at Manx. "I take it that's the only way to keep Kritiker safe?"

"Yes, and if we have even the smallest slip-up, we're all dead," she replied.

"We have to get this right," Crawford added.

"Alright," Ken said slowly, "how is using a gun going to frame the Mafia?"

"You're going to be using .22 Ruger Mark II. It's traditionally used by the Mafia during a hit and very user friendly. Now then," Manx continued briskly. "We're taking out the head of Information/Communications and his assistant, the head of Biotechnology and two assistants, two board members and the vice-president of Kuruma Global. We're also going to need to make sure the heads of Finance and New Business Enterprises take a long vacation."

"I'm taking the vice-president," Crawford snarled.

A startled silence filled the room.

"Of course," Manx said soothingly, her eyes wide.

"We'll need Omi and Nagi running tactical," Aya said evenly.

"So we'll take the info guy and his minion and Yohji, Far and Ken can get the others," Schuldig finished.

Yohji gave Ken a sly look. "Remember Ken, the hole points away from you and the safety has to be off for you to fire. Off, not on. Off."

"Shut it," Ken muttered, scowling darkly.

* * *

**Next day, 7 pm**

"Ah, Mr. Nakamura," Kinjo Zinan said as he opened his door. "I'm very pleased you could make it."

"Of course," the head of Finance replied. "Home is getting a trifle stifling, if you follow me."

"I'm afraid not," Zinan said with a laugh. "There's a reason I never married."

"Well, we-"

"Get out."

Zinan blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

Nakamura raised a shaky hand and pointed over Zinan's shoulder.

"I said, GET OUT!"

Zinan spun around, only to scream as a black-clad demon lunged for him. Cold steel pressed against his neck. "This is your only chance. If you want to live past the next twenty-four hours, you will do as I say. In one hour, you will turn your television to the news. You will see a warning there. If you do not heed that warning, you will suffer the same fate."

Nakamura snarled and lunged at the demon that had appeared out of thin air. A hand seized the neck of his jacket and a sword came to rest next to his throat. "You will get out. You will not speak to anyone, you will leave no note, you will do nothing but what I tell you. If you disobey, you will not be the only one to suffer."

With a wail of terror, Zinan made a break for the door. He slid to a sudden halt when the demon appeared in the doorway, blade extended.

"Leave, and do it silently. If you fail, I will be forced to silence you."

Zinan slid to the floor as he stared at the spot where the demon had just stood.

When Aya reappeared in the Koneko, Schuldig gave him a wide grin. _'Nice.'_

_

* * *

_

**7:39 pm**

Omi exhaled as he received confirmation that each team was in position. "Schatten confirmed," he said calmly. "Execute 180 seconds."

* * *

**7:40 pm**

Aya and Schuldig cast leisurely looks around the private bar as they carelessly seized control of the helpless patrons and staff. Their minds melded perfectly, allowing them to carry out their task effortlessly.

* * *

Yohji, Ken and Far silently slipped through the open window of the bright apartment, listening carefully to the muffled voices in the room next door.

* * *

Crawford calmly selected the eighteenth floor as the doors of the elevator slid shut. Since he was on the twelfth floor already, it would take mere moments to reach his target.

* * *

**7:41 pm**

Schuldig tossed back the dregs of his drink and hurried to catch up to Aya. The other telepath was already halfway across the room, making a beeline for the targets.

Farfarello smirked slightly as he heard the women's voices in the kitchen, chatting merrily as they cleaned up. He was glad they wouldn't be in the same room as the targets. They would probably be wearing pretty dresses. He doubted they would look as good covered in their husbands' blood.

Crawford strode out of the elevator, his determination to reach the office ahead driving him like a run-away freight train.

* * *

**7:42 pm**

In three separate locations, at exactly the same time, six heads exploded in a shower of blood and gore.

Aya took Schuldig's arm, calmly 'porting them from the building even as they released the minds of their captive audience.

Yohji, Ken and Far slipped out the window, scrambling up the rope ladder the Careflight helicopter had lowered. The pilot, a Kritiker agent, glanced back to make sure they were all secure before taking to the sky once more.

Crawford climbed down the back stairs, in a fairly pleasant state of mind. All that was left was explaining to Aya-chan that the mission was over. Lucky for him Manx had been volunteered for that job.

* * *

**7:43 pm**

Omi leaned back in his chair with a pleased expression on his face. Nagi studied his monitor for a moment before leaning towards the other hacker with a wicked gleam in his eyes.

"The police have been alerted to the situation," he said smugly. "They'll be on the scene in ten minutes."

"Perfect," Omi said gloatingly. "And the media?"

"Five minutes."

"Of course," Omi said happily.

Nagi stretched his arms above his head, twisting slightly. He screamed when he saw Aya and Schuldig watching them with amusement from behind.

"Why don't we let the other kittens know the good news," the German said slyly.

"Phrase it like that," Aya said calmly, "and I'll tell Brad you called him a kitten."

* * *

**Koneko, Next day**

Yohji glanced up at the TV tucked into the corner of the room, reading the captions running across the bottom of the screen.

_"Following the untimely demise of several key members of Kuruma Global, the heads of Kuruma Finance and New Business Enterprise have turned up missing. It is unknown at this time whether they have followed their co-workers to the grave or are, in fact, responsible. The police have asked that any information concerning the whereabouts of these two men be brought to the attention of the police force immediately. The twenty-four hour hotline is standing by._

_In other news…"_

"Looks like everything turned out just the way we wanted it to," Yohji murmured to himself. A particularly shrill shriek startled him from his thoughts. Maybe having Aya and Schuldig start working again wasn't such a good idea…

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	21. Trouble Threefold

**Total Mayhem: Chapter 20 – Trouble Threefold**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

_Many thanks to Jeff Foxworthy for his inspiring comedic routines, one of which is quoted below. Jeff, you're a genius._

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**Koneko**

Crawford stepped up behind Aya-chan, wrapping his arms around her waist. Without a look, she slipped out of his grasp and walked over to the fridge. With a soft sigh, Brad ran a hand through his hair and looked at her.

"Aya-chan, my love, please," he pleaded, "we would have told you, really, but there just wasn't time!"

Aya-chan didn't reply, didn't look at him. She slammed the door of the fridge shut, clutching the carton of eggs in one hand. She walked back to the stove, still ignoring him.

"Aya-chan," Brad groaned again, "will you answer me? Please?"

In the dining room, Yohji propped his feet up on the table and leaned back in the chair. He glanced over at Nagi.

"How long have they been at that now?" he asked wonderingly.

"Which part," Nagi replied dryly. "The cold shoulder or the begging?"

The blonde snickered. "The begging. That's getting no response."

Nagi's response was cut off by a high pitched scream from upstairs. Yohji glanced up.

"Sounds like Omi's awake," he yawned.

"Hmm," was Nagi's only response.

A blur suddenly shot past them and ran up the stairs. Brad Crawford hurried after it.

"Farfarello, what do you think you're doing?" Aya-chan demanded. "And you!" She spun in place, pinning Ken to the wall with a piercing look. "What do you think you're doing running in the house?"

"S-sorry," stammered Siberian, "I, err, heard screaming and, uh, wanted to make sure everything was…ok?"

"Yes, because that's worked so well in the past," Farfarello added helpfully.

"Now, now, angel," Schuldig said soothingly as he walked up to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Don't you think you're over-reacting just a bit?"

Aya-chan gave him a sharp look but didn't respond.

Aya, leaning up against the wall, glanced at Crawford. 'He looks like a kicked puppy,' he thought as he shook his head slightly. Schuldig shot Aya a grin.

'_When do you think the whimpering will start?' _

Aya snickered faintly.

Schuldig tugged the young woman away from Omi's door, shepherding her towards the stairs. "What you need now is to just put your feet up while we take care of breakfast. How does that sound?"

"You can cook without causing explosions?" she inquired dryly.

"Nope. Aya can. I excel at handing him things. Remember the milk?"

Aya-chan giggled slightly. "And the beans!"

The German nodded, a grin spreading across his face. "Yup, that was Brad's fault!"

"What?" Brad stuttered as Aya-chan's hysterical laughter drifted up the stairs.

"One of the perils of dating an assassin's sister," Aya said dryly as he pushed away from the wall after his sister.

Brad gave his back a dark glare.

"Schu's right," Aya added without turning. "Those negative thoughts **are** bad for your health."

The glare intensified for a moment before he turned towards Farfarello and the white-faced Omi who had stood frozen during the entire exchange.

"What do you think you're doing?" he demanded.

"I just opened my door," Omi whispered. "He threw a knife at me. It was…very low," he added with a whimper.

"I was just trying to get in a little early morning target practice!" the Irish man exclaimed.

"Yeah, with me as the target!"

Brad pinched the bridge of his nose. He could feel yet another migraine coming. "Farfarello," he said in a pained voice. "Why, just…what made Omi's **door** a target?"

"The target, of course!"

Omi stared at the madman in horror. "The target's on the other side!"

"But I still hit it," Far insisted. "The blades went in deep enough that they probably came out the other side."

Omi whimpered again, his blue eyes filling with silent horror.

"Farfarello," Brad snapped, "we have a room downstairs in the basement for just this purpose. Do not use Omi's door…anyone's door, room, wall or any personal belongings for target practice again! Early morning or no!" His eyes narrowed as a sudden idea hit him. "You know that Aya-chan doesn't like her home getting beat up."

The Irish man blinked.

"Oh…" He shifted from one foot to the other for a moment. "Do you think I should…uh, apologize to her?"

"Yes," Brad said dryly. "After you apologize to Omi and remove your knives from his door."

Farfarello gave him a crisp nod and spun around to seize the blades imbedded in Omi's door.

"I'm sorry," he said to the small hacker. "I promise I will never use your door for target practice ever again."

That said, he spun and marched purposely for the stairs. Brad followed his progress for a moment, his face thoughtful.

'Maybe if I apologized…with flowers…chocolate…plushy?' He frowned slightly. He would have to ask Aya if Aya-chan had a favorite TV character or animal. Yes, that would work.

Omi watched the leader of Schatten descend the stairs with his head held high. Then he turned to look at his door.

"It looks like it has the chicken pox," he groaned.

* * *

Aya-chan walked into the Brad's office, a tea tray balanced on her hip. Somehow, without making any eye contact or otherwise acknowledging Brad's existence, she opened the door and walked into the room.

Brad glanced up and immediately sprang to his feet. He hurried around his desk and took the tray from her hands, setting it down on a small corner of his desk that was kept clear for just this purpose. He took her hands and escorted her to a chair in front of his desk. Once she was seated, he leaned over and opened the drawer, pulling out a large blue velvet box with the word _Tiffany's_ written on the top. He handed it to her.

Aya-chan took the box and opened it, struggling to restrain her surprise. Inside was a 12-carrot diamond and emerald necklace.

For the first time in a week, she looked him in the eye.

Brad shot to his feet in panic as she set the necklace box on the desk and rose to her feet, stalking towards the door. He leapt to cut her off, backing up against the door, his hands pressing against the door frame.

"Please, please, please, just listen?" he begged, shocked to hear the groveling in his voice.

Aya-chan gave him a sharp look. "Fine. Talk."

"I…uh," Brad stuttered slightly. "I wanted to apologize…and…since I couldn't seem to say anything right, I was hoping…uh-"

"To buy my affections back?"

"No! No, I didn't…I mean I never…" He groaned. This wasn't going well. It actually reminded him of a comedian he'd heard once in the States before Rosenkreuz.

"_You ever have that dream you're taking a test you haven't studied for?"_

Jeff Foxworthy was a genius. 'I wish he was here instead of me,' Brad groaned to himself.

"Aya-chan, I'm sorry. I am so sorry."

"Sorry for what," she asked in a dangerous voice.

"For having to pretend to date Manx."

Her eyes went flat. She strode forward once more.

"That wasn't it?" Brad exclaimed in complete panic. "I mean…I thought…" His voice trailed off into a whisper.

Aya-chan sighed softly as she saw the complete misery in his eyes.

"Brad," she said softly. "It wasn't that you had to pretend to date Manx. I'm mad because you didn't trust me enough to tell me when you were completing the mission. I knew how much danger you were in. I was so worried! And then I find out that you had placed yourself in harms way like that…"

Brad bit his lip slightly, his hand reaching out to grasp hers.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I just wanted it all to be over, to finish it."

"I know," she whispered.

He leaned towards her, her face turning up to face his…

The door flew open.

"Ah, Oracle, Korat, I've been looking for you," Manx said briskly as the two jumped apart. She smirked at their blushing faces. "Mission," she said holding up a video.

* * *

"Men of Schatten," the blurry image of Persia began.

"Isn't this getting a bit old?" Yohji asked quizzically.

"A man named Saki Oroku has been committing acts of terrorism all across Tokyo."

"Shredder?" Brad asked in confusion. Several pairs of eyes turned to look at him.

"Saki is clearly deranged. He has been using explosives to write his name in English across Tokyo. He has only one building left to finish this John Hancock-"

"To finish a what?" Omi asked in confusion.

"The first man to sign the American Declaration of Independence," Brad said quickly.

"The police are moving in, but they will not be able to take action before the explosion."

"He's famous for signing his name larger than anyone else. He wanted to annoy the king of England," Aya added.

"Your mission is to disarm the explosives and stop Saki in his final attempt," Persia finished. The screen went dark.

"We have to kill Shredder?" Brad demanded, an odd look on his face.

"Who's Shredder?" Ken asked curiously.

"No, you just have to capture him," Manx told Brad.

"Shredder was the primary villain for the _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_," Yohji replied.

Brad and Aya stared at him.

"Mutant turtles?" Nagi chimed in.

"What, do their shells glow tie-dye colors or something?" Schu asked in confusion.

"Could we PLEASE focus here?" Manx demanded, a frazzled look on her face.

"We got it," Ken said absently. "Capture Shredder. I'm curious about these turtles."

"You forgot the explosives," Far added helpfully.

"You're just full of helpful advice today," Ken growled as he glared at the Irish man. Far merely shrugged, an amused grin on his face.

Manx whimpered faintly. Schu glanced at Aya, laughter in his eyes.

'_There's the whimpering,' _he sent merrily.

'_It doesn't count if it's not Brad,'_ Aya replied. "Where will the last explosion take place?" he asked, feeling sympathetic enough to try and help their poor contact.

"At the electric plant in south Tokyo. The one a block and a half from the nuclear plant."

Dead silence filled the room.

"I, ah, don't suppose there's any chance that the nuclear plant could explode, is there?" Yohji asked in a worried voice.

"It won't if we can keep Ken out," Far said.

"That's it," Ken muttered and lunged for the berserker.

Nagi grabbed both the soccer fans and absently flung them to opposite sides of the sofa.

"When is the explosion supposed to take place?" he asked.

"Within two days," Manx answered, still looking nervous.

"We'll be ready to move by sunset," Brad declared. "Correct, gentlemen?" he inquired with a raised eyebrow.

"We'll get on surveillance immediately," Omi promised as the two hackers rose from the sofa.

"Good," Brad said. "Now, let's figure out how to do this."

* * *

**Haretsu Energy Plant, 11:58 pm**

"We've been here for four hours," Ken muttered darkly.

"He'll be here," Brad snapped, his temper badly frayed after listening to the various members of Schatten complain after Saki had failed to appear.

"He is here," Schuldig said suddenly, his back straightening as he sensed the target's arrival.

"He's moving in," Omi reported. "He's carrying a briefcase."

"All right," Oracle said, drawing himself up. "Everyone move in."

Schatten spilled out of the plant's parking garage, breaking into two groups to enter the building.

Yohji glanced around as they entered the plant control room. Farfarello walked over to the control desk and peered through the window.

"Looks like he's in the plant proper," he said absently. "He's pulled off that trench coat he was wearing. He's got C-4 strapped to himself."

"That could be a problem," Yohji muttered. He touched the COM link in his ear. "The target is in the generator room. He's wearing part of the pen."

"He's what?" came Ken's confused response.

'_He has enough C-4 in the suitcase and strapped to his chest to blow up 4 blocks,' _Schuldig sent snidely.

'_Enough of that,'_ Brad said impatiently. _'Move in!'_

_

* * *

_

"It's over, Saki," Brad snapped at the bound man. Thanks to Nagi's judicious application of telekinesis, the bombs had not exploded. Yet. "Now, then, Saki," Brad continued. "Tell them."

Saki blinked slightly. "Tell them what, good sir?"

"That you are the same Saki Oroku in _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_!"

Saki gave him a knowing nod. "I see your point, yet it distresses me most greatly to inform you that you are in error. The Saki Oroku you seek is not I; it is instead my second cousin."

"All right, he's scaring me," Ken muttered.

"Who, Saki or Brad?" Schu asked.

"Shut up," Brad snapped. "How much longer until the bombs are disarmed?" he asked looking at Aya and Nagi.

"Soon," Nagi snapped, a bead of sweat trickling down the side of his forehead.

"Sooner if we aren't interrupted every two minutes," Aya snarled.

"I most humbly beg your pardon, noble sirs," Saki interrupted suddenly, "but I fear that there is information I must impart to you before you proceed any further."

"Someone make him stop," Yohji muttered in irritation.

"Your efforts to disarm my materials are in vain, for you see, if you were to succeed, you would meet a most unfortunate demise."

"Really," Brad muttered, still irked at the 'second cousin' comment.

"What are you talking about," Aya asked in faint alarm.

"You're the telepath, shouldn't you know?" Yohji asked curiously.

"He has natural mental shields," Aya muttered.

"Besides," Schuldig added, "would you really want to go in there?"

"Forcing entry will often cause severe damage," Brad finished.

"If my monologue may be permitted to continue," Saki interrupted, "I would inform the kind sir of the crimson locks that any further attempts to disarm my materials will result in immediate detonation."

Nagi and Aya froze, stood and took two large steps back.

"For in this case," Saki continued, "there is no blue wire, nor a red wire. There is only the arming mechanism. In less time than it takes to prepare a cup of ramen, there will be a most magnificent boom."

There was a moment of dead silence.

"Run," Ken whispered.

"Told you we shouldn't have brought him," Farfarello shouted as they bolted for the parking garage.

"Wait," Nagi exclaimed suddenly, skidding to a halt. "Aya! Take us to the garage, now!"

Aya blinked, his eyes widening in realization. He concentrated and suddenly the entire group was in the parking garage next to Brad's Mercedes, Aya's Porsche and Yohji's Super Seven.

"Too late!" Schuldig bellowed. In seconds, a symphony of cacophony erupted around them. Nagi threw up a shield, his eyes darting towards Aya. The telepath was panting slightly. The effort it had taken to move seven people combined with how little time they had until the shield failed meant Aya's teleportation skills would not be enough to rescue them.

'_Please tell me you can do something, Aya,'_ Schuldig whispered quickly.

'_I can't,'_ Aya gasped, _'I don't have the strength! It took everything I had to move so many people at once.'_

'_Well, find it! Borrow it!'_

The garage rumbled, blocks of concrete falling all around them, Nagi strained, trying to hold them back, when suddenly, a surge of power flooded through him. He gasped faintly, then pushed back at the blocks. He could faintly hear the sound of straining car engines. On a hunch, he glanced over at Aya. The violet eyes that met his seemed to glow with new power. The assassin nodded slightly. Nagi concentrated, pushing the foreign power back to Aya.

The last of the building collapsed. Schatten was gone.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	22. Memories Lost in a Storm

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twenty-one – Memories Lost in a Storm**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**6:52 am**

A faint whimper echoed through the dusty room. One of the bodies lying limply on the floor twitched, a hand groping blindly until it came to rest on a battered sword hilt. Farfarello glanced up, leaping to his feet and hurrying over when he saw who was stirring.

Violet eyes slowly opened, blinking blearily in the darkness. Something was coming, he realized. The explosion had shaken something loose…

A single gold eye peered into his.

"You're back," Farfarello said softly. "It's about time."

The telepath stiffened, his eyes widening as he screamed in silent pain.

* * *

Omi groaned as consciousness returned. He took a deep breath before rolling onto his side and taking a look around. A hand grasped his shoulder.

"Need a hand?" Nagi asked quietly.

"What's going on?" Omi glanced around again. "Where are we?"

"An abandoned warehouse," replied the other hacker. "On the corner of Souka and Michi."

Omi blinked. "The corner of where?"

Nagi snickered. "No idea. No one knows where we are." Omi paled. "Brad called Manx. She's coming to get us, so she must have found a map somewhere."

"If she's picking us all up," Omi began, "the only car that will hold all of us…"

"The pink delivery van," Nagi replied grimly. "Far was ecstatic."

"No, I'm just thrilled, there's a difference."

The two hackers gave the madman an identical look of annoyance. He merely grinned.

"Great," Omi groaned. "How is everyone?"

"Well, Brad sent Ken and Yohji out to look for Manx, Far's just hanging around, Brad's acting authoritative…" Nagi paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. "And Schuldig is trying to rouse Aya."

"Aya, what's wrong with him?" Omi asked in alarm.

"We don't know," whispered Nagi. "His eyes are open but he won't respond to anything. Other than that, he's fine."

Omi staggered to his feet, turning to look at the two telepaths. Aya was seated cross-legged on the floor, his head slightly bowed. Schuldig, crouched in front of him, had his eyes closed and his brow furrowed.

"Damn it." Omi bit his lip, struggling to push down the panic rising inside him.

'_Calm down,'_ Schuldig suddenly sent, _'he's in there. We just need to get him to come out. It took almost everything he had to get us here.'_

Omi gnawed on his lip, uncertain what he should do next.

"Manx is here," Ken suddenly called from outside.

**7:00 am**

**

* * *

**

Manx sighed softly as she watched Schatten collapse onto the couches in the mission room of the Koneko. Schuldig was carefully guiding Aya towards Brad's throne…chair.

"All right," she began. Before she could continue, feet pounded down the stairs.

"You!" Aya-chan roared, her eyes flashing dangerously.

Schatten cringed collectively (minus Aya, naturally). Brad could feel his heart plummeting. 'Not again,' he thought desperately.

"Do you know," She continued, "Do you know how lo…" She froze when her eyes came to rest on her brother. She took a step forward. "Ran?"

Violet eyes snapped up. He turned his head, looking at his sister.

"Yes?"

Jaws dropped.

Aya-chan squealed and flung herself at her brother. "I missed you!"

A slight smile crossed her brother's face as he returned the embrace. "So did I," he said.

Eyes popped.

Aya-chan finally pulled away and beamed at the team. "Now, you boys go shower and change while I make us some brunch."

No one tried to object. Heads were nodded collectively. Relief swept the room as Aya-chan's mood shifted 180 degrees. The young woman continued to chatter out orders and take requests for various dishes. Brad shook his head slightly in wonder. 'And here I thought I was in charge,' he mused.

* * *

**9:30 am**

It took almost two hours for everyone to assemble in the dining room. Aya-chan had outdone herself. The table was covered in every possible dish and an exceptionally lavish arrangement.

"After we eat, I want everyone to get some rest," Aya-chan admonished. "Manx said to call when you were ready, so we have plenty of time."

Fifteen minutes into the meal, Yohji suddenly gave a strangled cry, his eyes going wide. "The Seven…" he whimpered, "The Seven, all our cars…" his head hit the table with a loud thump. "They're gone, all gone."

"Oh dear," Aya-chan murmured.

Brad looked at her in disbelief. "Oh dear?" he muttered. "My car blows up and you say 'oh dear'?"

"Yes, oh dear," she snapped before turning to her right. "Ran? Nii-san?"

Ran's head rested in his hands. He'd liked his car, loved it, almost. It had been a present from Crashers. And now it was gone.

"Look at it this way," Omi said with forced brightness, "now you can buy a new car. And get Kritiker to pick up the bill," he added.

"After all," Nagi interrupted. "They were your personal vehicles." A car magazine dropped onto the table in front of Yohji. "You lost them while on the job. They'd have to reimburse you. Plus extra."

"Nothing can replace the Seven," Yohji moaned. He raised his head slightly and started flipping through the magazine. "The Seven was special. What could poss…" His voice trailed off as a picture of a particularly fancy car came up. He studied it for a moment. "Change can be a good thing," he finally stated.

Aya-chan gave them a scolding look. "You can worry about cars later. You all head up to bed."

* * *

**5:00 pm, Computer room**

Omi and Nagi were frantically clicking their respective mice and tapping quickly at the keyboards when Brad strode into the room, followed by Yohji and Ran. He stepped up behind the hackers and laid a hand on each of their shoulders. They screamed.

"I thought you said you'd make more noise next time," Omi gasped.

"I lied," Brad said dryly. "We need the computers."

"But we're in the middle of something important!" Nagi protested.

"I wasn't aware that online RPGs were high priorities," Brad said with an arched eyebrow.

"We just need them for a few hours, chibis," Yohji said.

The hackers looked at each other helplessly. They turned to Ran hoping for support. All they got was an amused look.

"Traitor," Nagi muttered.

"I try," Ran said dryly.

"You'll get them back," Yohji said as he made shooing gestures with his hands. "Now off with you."

The next forty-five minutes were filled with the sound of keyboards, mice and back and forth query's about this engine or that suspension system. Car color and interior seating were also carefully considered. Finally, decisions were reached, orders were made and Kritiker was made several thousands of dollars poorer.

* * *

During the car search, Ken, Farfarello and Schuldig awoke. Ken drifted downstairs and, finding moping hackers in the dining room, offered to raise their spirits by challenging them to multiple rounds of Halo. Farfarello was alerted by the noise and emerged, demanding to either be given a controller or to take the lowest ranking player's place.

Schuldig woke slowly, leisurely stretching as he sat up. His mind flickered back to Aya…Ran. His good mood instantly evaporated. 'Damn, it,' he thought angrily. 'What the hell is going on? One minute we're fine and then Aya's brain is gone to la-la land!' Something had happened, he knew it. Somehow, the extra power the other telepath had channeled had changed something. And damned if he knew what.

The German groaned, running his hands through his hair. He had no choice but to face the music. He swung his legs off the bed and stood up, searching the floor for clothes. Once dressed, he opened his mind slightly, looking for the mind that had inexplicably become closed to his, a mind so perfectly shielded he couldn't get in. He found the blank spot in the computer room. Gathering his courage, Schuldig headed downstairs.

He slipped into the dark room and heard voices drifting towards him. He walked up behind the men, peering at the monitors before perching on the table behind the desks.

Ran's head turned slightly. _'Schu?' _ he asked cautiously.

'_I don't suppose you're going to tell me what happened?'_ The German asked bitterly. _'Why you're going by Ran all of the sudden?'_

'_That last 'port…it shook a few things loose. I'm still trying to sort it all out, but for the most part, a great deal of my memories have returned.'_

'_Oh, so that's supposed to make everything all right, is it?'_

Ran suppressed a grin. Some things never changed.

"Boys!" Aya-chan suddenly called. "I hope you're done. Dinner's ready!"

Ran tipped back in his chair. "Who do you think you're calling 'boys', you little brat?"

Brad gave Ran a disapproving look. "Don't call my fiancé a brat."

"She may be your fiancé but she's my sister," Ran said mildly.

Yohji glanced at them from the corner of his eye. He nodded slightly to himself. Yup, the planets must be out of phase or something. Everyone was acting very weird.

"Well," Brad said as he closed the browser. "I hope you _boys_ are finished. Aya-chan won't keep the food warm forever."

Ran snorted. "I've been waiting for you two to finish."

Yohji quickly closed his browser and assumed an innocent expression. "Well," he said grandly, "why don't we go eat?" With that, he quickly walked out of the room.

Brad shook his head. He probably didn't need to, but it wouldn't hurt to have Omi and Nagi run an anti-virus program on that computer.

Ran watched the leader of Schatten walk out before turning to Schuldig.

'_Just because I remember doesn't mean everything's going to change,_' he sent softly.

Schuldig snorted softly.

'_Whatever.'_

Ran merely smiled slightly. _'Hungry?'_

Cool blue eyes regarded him carefully.

'…_I guess so.'_

_

* * *

_

**6:35 pm, Dining room**

"Now that we've eaten," Brad said as he tucked his napkin under the side of his plate. "Perhaps we can sort out what happened last night before Manx gets here in an hour?"

Everyone gave him blank looks. He sighed.

"Ay…uh, R…" He stopped and looked at Ran. "What happened?" Brad finally finished.

The teleporter shrugged slightly. "Schuldig told me to get more power, so I did. It happened so fast that I didn't have time to think about compensating for the extra boost. That's why we overshot the Koneko."

The silence stretched on after he spoke.

Nagi finally broke in. "Where did you get the power from?" he asked. "And how did you send it to me?"

"I'm still trying to work that out." Ran looked at him thoughtfully. "I knew you needed help, so I gave it to you."

"And I gave it back to you," Nagi murmured thoughtfully.

"Ok, stop," Brad said in a pained voice. "Let's start over. We were in the plant, yes?"

"Yes," Farfarello said. "Remember? Ken made it go boom."

"I did not!"

"Focus!" Brad exclaimed. "Now, A…Ran…you 'ported us into the parking garage?"

"Yes," Ran replied.

"Nagi put up the shield."

"Yes," said Nagi.

"Schuldig told you to get more power."

"Yes," the two telepaths said simultaneously. Schuldig's eyes flickered over at Ran.

"You found that power…somewhere."

"Yes," everyone said, now thoroughly tired of this.

"You sent it to Nagi."

"Obviously," the teen muttered. "Otherwise we'd be pancakes."

Brad gave him a dark look before continuing.

"You then sent that power back to Ran."

An exasperated yes answered him.

"Who used that power to take us to the abandoned warehouse."

"Are we done yet?" Ken asked plaintively.

Brad sighed dejectedly. "Fine." He turned to Ran. "You have no idea where the power came from?"

"Well," Ran replied thoughtfully. "I did hear car engines…I think."

"So did I," Nagi piped up.

Brad sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "All right, here's what we need to do." He looked at Omi and Nagi.

"You want us to go back," Nagi stated slowly.

"No way in hell," Omi finished.

"If I say you will-"

"Then the insurance company will never, ever, find the Koneko's forms," Omi threatened.

"No, no, no," Yohji whimpered. "No more crying babies."

"Well," Aya-chan suddenly said. "Why don't you two look through the information we already have?" she asked. "If we need more, we'll discuss how best to do that," she said.

"Then that's settled," Brad said before anyone could protest. "You two – research, now. Ran, Schuldig, Aya-chan, if you could come by my office in ten minutes, I think there are a few issues we need to discuss." He looked out over the table. "Those of you left will clear the table, wash the dishes, put away the food and clean the kitchen. We have…" he glanced at his watch. "Thirty minutes before Manx gets here. Let's try to have something for her."

* * *

**7:00 pm, Brad's office**

"All right," Brad said as he folded his hands on his desk. Aya-chan looked at him in obvious amusement. "It would appear that we have a few issues to work out. First:" He looked at Aya-chan. "What the hell made you call him Ran? How did you know that would work?"

Aya-chan bit back a grin. She'd never seen him so unraveled before. "I just…knew," she said. "His essence, his aura, I guess you could say, was different."

"What do you mean you just knew?" Brad groaned.

"It felt like before Taketori," she said gently glancing at her brother, mildly alarmed to see his eyes flash dangerously at that hated name.

"It felt…" Brad pressed his lips together. "Fine. A…R…" He stopped, frustrated. "What do you want to be called now? We have several options," he continued sarcastically. "Aya, Ran, Fujimiya, Hey-you…"

Ran gave him a narrow look. "Ran will suffice," he said grimly.

"Fine. Now what the hell is going on between you and Schuldig?"

The two telepaths blinked in surprise at the sudden change in topic. "Oh, well," Ran began uncomfortably.

"It's none of your business," Schuldig snapped.

"You better believe it's my business," Brad stated angrily. "I'm responsible for the safety of this team and I need to know about any issues that could put us all in danger."

"It won't," Ran said coolly. "This isn't any of your concern and it will not affect the team, so leave Schuldig the hell alone!"

Aya-chan thought the German looked rather startled by the vigorous defense her nii-san was putting up for him.

Brad's teeth snapped together, his glasses glinting dangerously in the small room.

"Really, Bradley," she said blandly, "I'm sure the boys can work this out. They are grown-ups, after all."

The look Brad gave her told her volumes. He was tired of being caught off guard lately. It had to stop. It would stop, he told himself grimly. The first chance they got, he and Schuldig would be going over the Koneko and all its inhabitants for an explanation for his failing visions.

* * *

**7:30 pm, briefing room**

Manx descended the stairs to the mission room, starting in surprise when she saw all of Schatten assembled. Yohji glanced up at her and stood.

"You might want to sit down for all this," he said calmly.

The red-haired woman bit her lip slightly before walking over to the sofa where the lanky assassin had been sprawled. She sat down with all the grace and calm demonstrated by a professional Kritiker contact. In other words, she flopped.

"Please bear with us," Brad said blandly as he rose from his thro…chair. "As you know," he began. "Our mission was to apprehend Saki Oroku before he could detonate the electric plant. We failed. This should not, however, be viewed as a complete failure," he continued. "Saki was clearly unstable and I could not, in good conscious, place the human race in the potential situation of dealing with any possible offspring of that…thing."

Having finished his piece, Brad seated himself once more and nodded slightly to Omi and Nagi.

"Saki did one thing intelligently," Nagi said. "There was no way for us to disarm his bomb in the time allotted."

"Once we realized that," Omi continued, "we turned tail and ran. Once we remembered that A…Ran could teleport, he utilized his abilities to return us to the parking garage where our vehicles were waiting."

"Unfortunately," Nagi said, "we did not have enough time to get away. I threw up a shield and held it for as long as I could. When the shield began to fail, Ran proved that things really do come in threes – he used the Super Seven, the Mercedes and the Porsche as a gestalt."

Manx raised her hand to interrupt. "Another power?" She asked warily.

"Yes," Omi replied. "This one's really very simple, though."

"A gestalt is a generator or other mechanical device utilized by a Talent for extra power," Nagi explained. "In this case, he used three car engines to supplement my strength and his."

"If it wasn't for that, you'd be short a team," Omi finished.

"And you'd have Aya-chan on you for getting us killed," Schuldig added blandly. The room shuddered collectively.

"We made you a copy of Rosenkreuz's data," Nagi said as he extended a thick packet. "We'd really, really prefer not to have to go back into their systems," he added.

"I'm sure this will be sufficient," Manx replied. "It's not like anyone at Kritiker will understand anyway," she added under her breath. "Now," she continued briskly. "From what you've said and what we've observed from the rubble, I believe you're down three cars. I would like to take this opportunity to inform you that Kritiker will reimburse you each with a new car since these were your personal vehicles."

"Oh, we've already taken care of that," Yohji said, edging towards the stairs slightly.

"We took sometime this afternoon to order them," Brad interrupted. "They should be here in approximately one week."

"One week," Manx repeated wearily. "All right, how much are they?"

"Well," Brad continued. "I purchased a Dodge RAM 1500 Daytona Quad cab with 22" wheels. It runs at roughly $50,000 American."

"1970 Dodge Challenger. Classic American muscle. $45,000 American," Ran said calmly.

Yohji cleared his throat softly. "Ferrari F430 Spider, 483 hp, 4.3 liter V-8, 8500 rpm. Goes 0-60 in 3.6 seconds and tops out at about 183 mph. $206,000 American."

Manx blinked slightly, trying to process the rapid delivery. She blinked again. Her eyes glowed with a smoldering fire. "I won't let Kritiker come after you," she growled, "I want the pleasure of killing you myself!" With that she catapulted from the couch and lunged at the blonde.

Yohji quickly stepped to the side, catching her arm and swinging her around before she ran into the equipment closet. "Now, now," he said soothingly. "I don't expect Kritiker to pay for all of it. I'm putting part of my savings towards this," he continued. "And it will last for years, so I won't have to buy anything new for quite some time."

Manx sagged slightly in his grasp, the fire in her eyes dying.

"I give up," she said weakly. "I'm just the contact," she began to babble; "I shouldn't have to deal with all this. I just bring the folders and the video tape."

Yohji looked at her in alarm. The rest of Schatten had passed alarm. Aya-chan hurried to her feet and put an arm around the red-haired woman's waist and began to lead her upstairs.

"The only reason I know about the missions is from what I read in the folders and the rumors I hear at the office," she continued. "And I have to put up with, with strange people with strange abilities…"

The two women began to climb the stairs.

"And all they do is make sarcastic comments. It's all testosterone, all the time," Manx rambled. "You never see women assassins. You should, they aren't as stupid about things…"

Schatten stared at the stairs as the women disappeared. They could just make out Aya-chan's offer of a "nice, hot cup of tea" and Manx's request for it to be Irish.

"I think we may have gone a bit too far," Yohji murmured, his eyes wide.

"Definitely," Far said seriously. "She doesn't even remember that she wants Irish _coffee_, not tea."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

**_

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	23. Vanished

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twenty-two – Vanished**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**3:38 pm**

Aya-chan pursed her lips as she studied her shopping list. Deciding she hadn't forgotten anything, she ripped the paper from the pad, folded it and tucked it into her pants pocket. She rose from her chair with the now-blank pad in hand and walked over to the phone, setting it in place next to receiver. Even as she turned away, the phone began to ring. She picked it up and listened, grabbing the pad once more and jotting down a quick note. After hanging up the phone, she made a point of setting the note in an easy-to-read location and hurried down the stairs and out the door.

* * *

**5:17 pm**

"It's dangerous heading to the grocery store during a sale," Aya-chan said as she put away several cartons of milk. "The women are crazy! I practically had to wrestle one to get these two cantaloupes!"

Yohji grinned at her as he folded the grocery sack and hung it on the inside of the pantry door. "That's why we let you do the dangerous jobs," he said lightly. "Assassination is pretty easy. Grocery shopping with deranged women is hazardous to one's health!"

Aya-chan laughed. "Oh," she said suddenly. "Someone called right before I left. Did you get the note?"

"Note?" Yohji asked in puzzlement. "What note?"

"By the phone," she said, gesturing vaguely behind her.

Frowning slightly, the blonde slipped out of the kitchen and over to the phone where it rested on the half-wall that separated the dining room and the sitting room. A quick glance showed Ran curled up in one of the chairs reading an intimidatingly thick book. He did find it odd that Schuldig was in another chair with his own book. Considering the rising tensions between the two since the Saki mission, he would have thought the German would be avoiding the other telepath.

He shrugged to himself as he reached the phone, rolling his eyes slightly as he noticed the small notepad propped up against the wall. He picked it up, reading it quickly with widening eyes. A huge grin suddenly stretched across his face. He spun to look at the two telepaths.

"They're here!" he shouted.

Ran started slightly, blinking rapidly as he looked up from his book. Schuldig studied him for a moment before nodding.

"The cars," the German said matter-of-factly.

"Yup," Yohji said, still grinning. "Hey, boss," he hollered towards Brad's office. "The cars are here!"

There was a moment of silence before the door to the office opened and a grumpy looking Brad Crawford walked out.

"What are you hollering about, now," he scowled.

"Nice to see you, too," Yohji said dryly. He tossed the notepad to the precog. "The cars are here!"

"When did they call?" Brad asked with a slight frown.

Yohji shrugged. "Ask Aya-chan. She took the message."

Brad turned slightly, "Aya-chan," he called, "When did the warehouse call?"

"What?" she called back as she walked out of the kitchen.

"The warehouse," he said holding up the pad. "When did they call?"

"Right before I left for the grocers," she said after a moments thought. "That would have been, oh, an hour and a half ago."

"An hour and a half," Yohji muttered.

"When we get back, we're going to have to talk about this," Ran said as he closed his book. "We're male. We're not going to see a note sitting next to the phone. Now grab on so we can go! You, too, Schu," he added looking at the German.

Schuldig looked at him, his face blank and his mind closed before rising and grabbing his arm. The others followed suit. After a moment of concentration, they were gone.

* * *

**5:43, Intersection of Chiri and Zoku**

"Come on, nii-san," Aya-chan said, her eyes glowing. "Make them eat our dust!"

"Your wish is my command," Ran said dryly. "Is it all right if we wait for the light to turn green first?"

"Oh, really," she huffed. Ran glanced out the window at the silver truck that dwarfed almost every car on the road. Brad Crawford glanced back, raising an eyebrow slightly when the red-head revved his engine. He promptly revved his back in challenge.

'_Yohji, when this light goes green it's full on to the Koneko. First one back wins.'_ Ran sent as he prepped to accelerate. This was going to be fun.

The screech of tires that is associated with sudden acceleration was the only sound that could be heard as the three assassins peeled out of the intersection, each intent on reaching the Koneko first.

They hit speeds that shouldn't have been possible in downtown Tokyo on any occasion. The traffic lights obeyed their wills as did the drivers around them. They maneuvered through traffic like professional racers. They pulled stunts that Evil Knievel would have fainted at. But in the end there could be only one. It was Yohji.

* * *

"We need to do that again, real soon!" Aya-chan exclaimed as she bounded out of the car.

Yohji grinned at her, his eyes still glowing with an almost predatory light as he climbed out of his own vehicle.

"Some other time, perhaps," Brad grumbled as he popped the door to the truck open.

"Oh, poo," Aya-chan huffed. "You're just sore that you lost despite being able to see the future."

"It will be quite interesting to see how many wrecks we caused," Ran said dryly as he slammed the door shut. "I seem to remember several loud explosions."

"It doesn't matter," Schuldig said. "No one will remember seeing us and I'd say you fried the city grid, so no worries."

"Well, I need to start dinner," Aya-chan said.

"Good," Brad said briskly. "You pop the popcorn and I'll order the pizza."

"What?" was the collective response.

"Pizza?" Yohji asked in confusion.

"Yes," was Brad's slightly surprised response. "For movie night."

"Movie night?" Schuldig asked. "We're having a…movie night?"

* * *

**Koneko, basement**

'_All right, you slackers,' _Schu sent lazily, _'big important meeting, so come on down to the basement.'_

'_Nagi, Brad would like for you to make sure everyone comes downstairs. He said to bring them with you if they didn't come,'_ Ran sent.

'_This must be pretty important,'_ Nagi sent back.

_'He seems to think so,'_ replied Ran.

Ken was the last member of Schatten to arrive. He stopped dead as he rounded the corner and came into view of the briefing room. The lights were off and the tv was on. Aya-chan was inserting a disc into the DVD player and one of the coffee tables from the game room had been brought down. It was covered in several boxes of pizza, soda, chips and candy. Brad stood in the front of the TV, the light making it hard to see his face.

"Ah, Ken," he said, his powerful voice sweeping through the room. "Gentlemen," he began.

"And ladies," Aya-chan added as she poked his arm.

"And ladies," he dutifully repeated. "I believe you recall a target named Saki Oroku. I will now prove beyond any shadow of doubt that he was in fact the arch-villain Shredder."

"Not this again," Farfarello groaned.

"Shredder?" Omi asked plaintively.

"Arch-villain?" Nagi asked speculatively.

"Watch and learn," Brad gloated. That said, he strode over to his th…chair and sat down, clicker in hand. On the screen, the New York City skyline appeared. The camera quickly zoomed in to the native population and a TV report.

"What, exactly, is this?" Ken asked nervously.

"You'll see," Yohji chuckled slightly.

"I can't believe they made her a reporter," Brad muttered as the report continued.

"It fits better with the plot," Ran retorted.

"But if you want to stay true to the original comics," Yohji interrupted, "then you would see that she was a lab assistant."

"Exactly," Brad cried in satisfaction.

"Shhh," Far hissed. "We're trying to watch the movie!"

It was a tribute to the madman's determination that he didn't shrink back from the three death glares leveled at him.

"Fine," huffed the leader of Schatten. He rose to his feet and stalked to the back of the room where the debate could continue. Yohji and Ran followed.

"Why are there giant turtles?" Ken begged.

"Keep watching," Far hissed.

"They're dancing." Nagi stated with a furrowed brow. "That's not right."

Omi glanced over at them. "The giant rat seems to agree."

Behind them, the debate was raging. Finally Yohji held up his hands. "All right, I'll prove it to you." Brad and Ran gave him skeptical looks. "I have the originals upstairs."

"The…" Ran began.

Brad gave him a hard look. "As in, original comics?"

"Yeah," Yohji said in surprise. "They're in my closet."

Without another word, Ran grabbed Brad and Yohji's arms and 'ported them upstairs.

Nagi glanced back, then suddenly did a double take. "Where did they go?"

* * *

The three assassins continued to dig through the blonde's overflowing closet.

"So how did you get original comics?" Ran asked curiously.

"My father sent them to me," Yohji began. "He was only stationed in Japan for a few years, but he never missed a birthday or Christmas. He usually sent me comics."

"You do realize that they're worth thousands by now, right?" Brad inquired. He paused for a moment as a thought struck him. "Ran, how exactly do you know all this? Where are you from?" he asked.

"Texas. Waxahachie. You?"

"Fort Stockton…wait, Texas?"

Ran looked at him in amusement.

"Found them!" Yohji suddenly called. He grasped a largish wooden box and carefully pulled them out.

"These are in good shape," Ran said, clearly impressed.

"Well," Yohji said, blushing slightly. "They were presents. They deserve to be taken care of."

"Still," Brad said. "It can be quite difficult to find plastic comic book covers in Japan."

* * *

**7:00 pm, next day, second floor**

Manx slowly climbed the round staircase of the Koneko. Her face had been carefully composed to convey a sense of professionalism. She would not leave this meeting as the loser. She would be the victor!

As she walked out onto the second floor, Brad's voice hailed her.

"Good evening, Manx," he called.

"Oh, Manx," Aya-chan exclaimed brightly. "May I get you a cup of tea?"

"Ah, no," the red-haired woman said with a trace of nervousness. What she saw shocked her. In the dining room and sitting area was…a perfectly normal family household in action. Ran was assisting Nagi with literature homework in the dining room while Omi helped Sakura (who had come over for dinner) with pre-calc. Farfarello, Yohji, Ken and Schuldig were playing what appeared to be Texas hold 'em poker. Aya-chan, now busy in the kitchen had been reading what looked like a romance novel and Brad was busy with the paper.

Manx suppressed a whimper. This wasn't right. There was supposed to be screaming and chaos. Explosions and swear words. Not…peace. The hand that held a small manila envelope shook slightly.

Brad looked at her in concern. "Are you well, Manx?" he asked.

The woman gave herself a slight shake. She was a professional, damn it! "Perfectly well," she said briskly as she began to stride forward once more. After all, she'd shot Brad Crawford before and she could do it again! "Reimbursement check from Kritiker for your new cars," she said, voice neutral.

"Ah," Brad said as he accepted the envelope. "I'll send Yohji with this in the morning." The blonde groaned softly.

Aya-chan suddenly emerged from the kitchen with a small tea tray. She walked up to the contact, smiling apologetically. "I'm sorry I can't stay longer," she said softly. "I'm afraid I have to leave for class in a few minutes."

"Of course," Manx replied as she took the proffered cup. For a fleeting moment she wished it was something stronger. Over at the poker game, Schuldig muffled a snicker.

* * *

**11:35 pm, Kuro Subway Station**

Aya-chan walked down the stairs to the subway platform, glancing around the deserted area. She came to a stop as a well-dressed gentleman approached her.

"Excuse me, madam," he began. "I'm in town on business and I believe I've gotten a bit turned around. I'm trying to get to the station at Chikatetsu and Rachisuru." He waved a subway map vaguely as he continued. "Am I on the right platform?"

"Oh, I'm afraid not," she said after studying the map for a moment. As she continued to talk, another man emerged from the darkness. She had no time to react as a chloroformed rag was pressed against her face. In moments, her body had gone limp.

* * *

**12:01 am, Koneko**

"Aya-chan should be back soon," Brad murmured. "She was meeting with one of her professors after class to talk about some extra credit."

Ran made a soft noise, his eyes locked on his book. The silence stretched on.

The phone rang.

Ran glanced up, blinking. He gave Brad a side look, rolling his eyes slightly when the other man failed to react. Levering his lanky form up, he walked over to the phone.

'It's too late to deal with anyone,' he thought to himself. He'd let the machine answer, he decided. If it was someone important, he'd pick up.

The machine clicked and then Aya-chan's voice filled the room. "Hi, we're not here right now, so leave us a message! Bye!"

A slightly stunned silence answered her perky voice. Then a gravely voice spoke up.

"We have the girl. We want Schwarz."

Ran's eyes widened. Brad's book fell. The red-head seized the phone. All he heard was a dial tone.

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

_**

* * *

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_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	24. The Mysterious Hero

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twenty-Three – The Mysterious Hero**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**12:01 am, Koneko**

"We have the girl. We want Schwarz."

* * *

Schuldig bolted upright as a wave of _shock-grief-loss-anger-rage-hatehatehatehatehate_ swept over him. He scrambled out of the bed, nearly falling flat on his face as he bolted for the stairs.

When he reached the second floor, he careened off the stairs, following the wave of wild emotions to the sitting room. He skidded to a halt as he rounded the corner, his eyes widening at the sight of Abyssinian clutching what was left of the phone receiver while Oracle counted the number of bullets left in his clip with an eerie amount of calm – the calm that only appears before a storm.

Crawford glanced up when he heard Schuldig's arrival. His eyes were cold, filled with a silent rage.

"They are going to pay for what they've done," he growled. "There will be no escape."

"What's happened," the German demanded, an icy chill sweeping up his spine. It had been years since he'd seen this side of Oracle. And the arrival of this…bitterly angry product of the destructive force that was Rosenkreuz was a mere preamble of the calamity that was certain to come reigning down.

"She's gone," Ran said in a hoarse voice. "They took her. They took Aya-chan!"

"They," Schuldig asked in confusion. "Th-" His face went white. "You mean Esset," he whispered.

Ran missed the German's frightened voice. His face had contorted into a bitter caricature of his (Ran's, that is) normally genial face. He wheeled around until he was nose to nose with the leader of Schatten.

"This is your fault," he hissed malevolently. "She was safe before you arrived. She wasn't involved. Your arrival has placed her in danger once more!"

"You think I wanted this?" Crawford snapped, his glasses flashing dangerously. "Whether you believe it or not, I would do anything to keep her from harm. I love her, damn it!" he roared.

Schuldig grabbed Ran's shoulder, yanking him away from Oracle before the two could come to blows.

"This is nobody's fault," he said evenly, using his telepathy to reinforce his words. "The only thing we can do now is figure out how to get her back."

Ran's eyes narrowed, a dangerous light filling his eyes. "Why don't we give them what they want?" he growled.

By now, the rest of Schatten had stumbled down the stairs. Finally, Nagi broke in.

"What's going on?" he demanded.

The telepaths and precog jerked when they realized they had an audience.

Ran's eyes remained focused on Crawford as he spoke. "Aya-chan is gone," he said bitterly.

"Esset has her," Schuldig added in a pained voice.

"They want to exchange her for us," finished Crawford.

Nagi's face had gone pale. "Esset?" he whispered.

Unnoticed by Schatten, Manx finished climbing the stairs to the second floor, a harried look on her face. Spotting Ken close-by, she hurried over to him and shoved a manila folder into his hands.

"I know she's gone," she said quickly. "I just got the call. Here's all the data we have pertaining to Esset's recent activity in Japan. We've been gathering it to bring to Schatten. We figured that you would have the best chance at making sense out of it. The orders for Aya-chan's retrieval are also included and are non-negotiable. Good luck!" she exclaimed as she backed away towards the stairs.

Ken stared after her. Her orders had taken less than twenty seconds. And he was left holding the goods, so to speak.

"I'm not going back," Nagi shouted suddenly. Ken looked up in alarm.

"None of us are," Brad said soothingly.

The young telekinetic gave him a disbelieving look. "You said they want Schwarz and apparently Ran's ok with that!"

"You know he didn't mean that," Schuldig said as soothingly as possible.

Nagi gave Ran a sharp look. The red-head gave him a contrite one in return.

"I didn't mean it," he said softly. "I spoke out of anger. I apologize."

A shaky nod answered him.

Ken took a deep breath before stepping forward.

"Manx just left," he said in a quavering voice. "She left us this," he added, holding up the folder. Brad leapt forward, snatching the information from his hands. He ripped the top of the envelope off, ignoring the metal brad that held it closed. He yanked out the thick stack of papers. A smaller, handwritten note fluttered to the ground. The precog silently handed the papers to Schuldig and picked up the note. Ran and Schuldig peered over his shoulders, projecting the words to the rest of Schatten.

"_We have recently become aware that Esset has once again become active in Japan. Unfortunately, we were unable to act quickly enough to prevent this incident. You are permitted to retrieve Korat by any means, including the use of any Kritiker teams (i.e. – Crashers, under the condition that they maintain their non-lethal status). _

_There is, however, one condition to these orders. The team formerly known as Schwarz cannot be involved in the rescue-"_

It was here that Brad's face contorted into an expression of pure rage, the note crumpling in his fist. Ran reached over and pried the tight fist open. Uncrumpling the note, he continued to read.

"_The team formally known as Schwarz cannot be involved in the rescue, as their arrival will be anticipated by Esset. Schwarz is to take shelter in Saito Mansion along with Tomoe Sakura, as she has also been involved in Esset actions in Japan."_

Silence filled the room as Ran's mental voice fell silent. Brad growled suddenly and began stalking towards his office for more guns.

"They can't stop me," he growled. Nagi quickly seized him in a kinetic hold. Schuldig walked up to the leader of Schatten, looking him straight in the eye.

"We can't go," he said softly. "We can't. That's what they're expecting."

"Fine," Brad snapped. "Let them think they know what's coming."

"No!" Schuldig snapped. "We. Can't. Go!" he snarled, _pushing_ the command into his leader's mind. Brad's face remained unreadable, but his spine seemed to go limp as his head bowed. Cautiously, Nagi released him, only to stare in shock as he crumpled to the ground. He quickly grabbed a chair from the dining room and flew it over to the limp precog. Schuldig grasped him by the arm, carefully hauling him into the chair.

Farfarello watched the arguments float back and forth for a minute before shaking his head. Clearing his throat, he pounded his fist on the half-wall that separated the dining and sitting room.

"All right," he said briskly. "That's enough of that. We can't help Aya-chan if we're doing our best impressions of chickens with their heads cut off."

All eyes turned to the Irish madman. He held a yellow legal pad in one hand, covered in notes and a pen in the other.

"Omi, Nagi," he ordered, "start searching for Aya-chan. Let's try to beat Kritiker. Yohji, call Crashers." He extended a scrap of paper with a phone number scrawled on it. "Tell them to meets us at Saito Mansion. Ran, call Sakura. She'll need to pack enough to last several days. If it's longer than that, we'll send an agent to collect more clothes and personal items. Ken, gather our gear. Divide it between Brad's truck and Ran's Challenger. "

He gave the leader of Schatten a narrow look.

"Pull yourself together, Oracle. You can't help Aya-chan in this state. Go pack for yourself and Nagi. He's not going to have time. Schuldig, start throwing together your pack. Once you're done with that, see who else needs help."

Everyone stared as Berserker barked orders left and right like a four-star general. He gave them a piercing look, his single eye glinting dangerously.

"Well? Get moving!"

**12:08 am**

**

* * *

**

**12:53 am, Tomoe residence**

Sakura grabbed the last of her textbooks, stuffing them into her backpack.

"Note," she muttered to herself, "have to leave a note for Mom." She quickly grabbed pen and paper and scrawled quickly.

_"Aya-chan invited me to stay at the Koneko for a few days so Nagi and I can work on a project for school. I'll be back in a few days. You have my cell number if anything comes up. See you in a few days! Love, Sakura."_

"That should do the trick," she muttered as she darted into the kitchen to stick it to the fridge. It was the one place her mother was guaranteed to see it.

She ran back to her room and grabbed her duffel and backpack so she could haul them to the front door. After setting them down, she grabbed her pillow and teddy bear from where she had put them on the sofa earlier and settled down to wait.

Scarcely three minutes later, she heard the deep rumble of an imported car. 'That's him,' she thought as she gathered her belongings. She slipped out the door and started down the walkway to the street. When she saw the car the red-haired assassin was in, she froze. That wasn't the white Porsche that she'd been rescued by after her kidney was stolen. She blinked for a moment, shrugged, and began to walk again.

* * *

**1:17 am, Saito Mansion**

"Crashers, Schatten," Brad said briskly as he looked over the two teams. "Schatten, Crashers. Now," he began.

"Don't you think they need more of an introduction?" Ran asked curiously.

"Under the circumstances, no!"

Ran looked at him in exasperation. "If we're going to work together, we do need to know names."

"Fine," Brad snapped. "Do what you want."

Ran rolled his eyes slightly before rising to his feet. Crashers looked at him curiously. They didn't remember Ran being this…calm.

"Crashers, this is Schatten. Brad Crawford is in charge. He can see the future…most of the time."

Nagi snickered faintly.

Ran gave him an amused look before continuing. "Brad led Schwarz, which used to work for Esset. They'll be giving us a rundown for what we need to know for the mission. Brad's second was Schuldig, a German telepath. The team is rounded out by Nagi, a fifteen year old hacker and telekinetic and Farfarello, an Irishman who can't feel pain and named himself after a character from _Dante's Inferno_."

"Is this arrangement typical of Esset teams?" Reiichi asked worriedly.

"Somewhat," Schuldig answered. "The teams are made up of talents, but the mix can be quite interesting, as team leaders have some freedom over who gets in."

"I was supposed to slow Schwarz down," Far said happily. "But I helped, instead."

"I'm sure you did," Masato muttered as he lit another cigarette.

"Schatten is made up of Schwarz and Weiss," Ran continued after delivering a number of dark glares around the room.

"Did you do that on purpose?" Yuushi asked skeptically. "Black and white?"

"It just worked out that way," Yohji said dryly. "Sad, isn't it?"

"No, just karma," Far argued.

"First Murphy and now karma?" Ken asked in confusion.

"Why not?" Far asked.

"If you don't mind," Brad interrupted with a black look.

"Not at all," Masato replied. "Please continue."

Ran gave him a narrow look. _'Knock it off,'_ he sent to the joined teams.

Yuushi squawked in surprise while Naru's eyes popped.

"Weiss is made up of Kritiker's best assassins," Brad said. "Ran, you know. What you do not know is that he is also a telepath and a teleporter. He can also utilize gestalt."

"Was that supposed to make sense?" Masato asked in confusion as he nervously glanced at the red-head.

"Yes," was Brad's dry response.

"It's all Schuldig's fault," Ran said calmly. "He managed to activate latent abilities a few months ago."

"That's fine," Reiichi said after shooting warning looks at Masato and Yuushi. "Please continue."

"Omi is Weiss's hacker and long-range assassin. He specializes in darts and bows," Brad continued. "Yohji uses a garrote wire that remains hidden in his watch and Ken, whom you might remember from the J-league several years ago, is a former soccer goalie who was framed for another's crimes. He uses bagnuks, which are basically four blades on a glove."

"I feel so safe," Yuushi muttered. "I'm in a room of maladjusted men who kill for a living."

"Now," Ran said. "Schatten, this is Crashers, which is short for party-crashers. Crashers specializes in search and rescue, framing people, finding data and-"

"Explosives!" Naru exclaimed happily.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Masato said, waving his cigarette like a baton. "Meet the boy most likely to blow up Tokyo."

"I feel so safe," Nagi said dryly.

"Ha, ha," Yuushi muttered darkly.

"Crashers is led by Shirasagi Reiichi. He is the mission planner for Crashers. Honyou Yuushi is next," Ran continued. "He fights with a whip with a blade on the end. I don't believe it has a name."

"Yes, it does!" Yuushi exclaimed. "It's a Cundledargeun."

"Could I see that sometime?" Far asked curiously.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea," Omi muttered.

Far gave him a dark look. "Is this the gun issue all over again?"

"Yes," the young hacker said shortly.

"Tanuma Masato is Crasher's grunt," Ran said. Masato grinned. "If he must use a weapon, he uses a bo. He usually ends up using his fists."

"Darn right, I do," Masato grunted.

"Finally, we have Naru. He is Crasher's explosives expert."

"We got that part," Nagi reminded the red-haired telepath.

"Are you finally done?" Brad snapped.

"Yes, oh fearless leader," Ran said dryly.

Yuushi gave Reiichi a _look_, one that clearly said _'what the hell is with this team?'_

'_There's nothing wrong with us,'_ Schu sent the pair. They gave him a slightly frightened look. He merely smirked.

'_I've still got it,'_ he muttered to Ran.

"Children," Brad snapped, temper fraying noticeably. "Could we please focus on the matter at hand?"

"We already know what the matter is," Ran said with some irritation.

"Yeah, Brad," Schu added. "You're leaking all over the place. We've already got everything."

"There will be between three to five people on the perimeter five miles out from the facility where **my sister** is being held," Ran began.

"After those, you'll have to take care of three more at the one mile radius mark. At this point anyone still at the complex will know you're there," Schuldig continued, smirking at Brad's rising irritation.

"Knowing how powerful and thusly how valuable Schwarz is, we're probably looking at a dozen guards. Three on the grounds covering each entrance and two on the roof just as precautions. There will be two strictly devoted to guarding Aya-chan. There will be five more there to take shifts with the others," Ran finished.

Brad blinked in irritation and confusion. He may have been leaking, but it couldn't have been that bad…could it?

'_It's not that bad, but it's extremely intense,'_ Ran sent silently.

Brad gave him an annoyed look before speaking.

"Crasher's job will be to locate Aya-chan and get her out while Schatten takes care of the guards." He gave them all a level look. "You will have no way of knowing exactly who is talented and who is not. And you won't know what talent they have until they start using it."

"Weiss is used to fighting talents," Yohji said dryly. "We usually got our butts kicked but we could hold our own for a while."

"Not only that," Omi added, "but you're getting a heads up. Which is far more than we got."

"And we have talents on our side," Ken finished. "Esset's **best** talents."

"Stop right there," Far ordered, his eye widening. "Any more and You-Know-Who will appear!"

Ken's eyes widened as well and he quickly knocked on the wooden floor three times.

* * *

**1:44 am, abandoned warehouse**

Dark blue eyes critically surveyed the abandoned warehouse were his cousin was being held. It was pure luck that he'd picked up on her mental signature the day before. He'd obeyed his father's command to the letter – he'd stayed away when he realized just who he was sensing in the university…and look what had happened.

His lips tightened into a thin line. He could get her out, get her to safety but that was it. Under the current laws of this country, he couldn't leave home until he turned eighteen. Luckily, that wasn't far off.

'At least,' he thought dryly, 'as far as the rest of the world is concerned I'm still seventeen.' He reflected on that statement for a few moments as he absently knocked the outermost guards out. 'There are times when it sucks to be me,' he sighed dramatically to himself.

'At least Shay isn't here,' he thought as he ran towards the warehouse. 'There's no point in involving her in family matters. Not when she has her own to deal with.' Issues she would only accept the slightest bit of help on, actually. He shook his head slightly as he came up on the next layer of guards.

'Why in the world are the weaker guards on the inside perimeter?' he wondered in amazement. The first layer had been double talents: a telekinetic precog, a pirokinetic precog, an inokinetic telepath (finding another wind user had been a major surprise) and a telempath. The inside layer, on the other hand was merely a precog and two telepaths.

'I'll leave them for Kritiker,' he decided as he tossed the last telepath away. 'I have to leave them something, after all.'

He crouched for a moment before leaping up to the roof. 'Grunts,' he realized as he kicked the two guards off the roof. 'Esset uses schools like Rosenkreuz to train talents of all types and they're using grunts? That's almost obscene,' he thought as he shook his head in disgust.

He blinked suddenly. He'd almost forgotten. "Mariah," he whispered into the wind. "Mariah, do you mind?" he asked again in slight annoyance. A blue orb suddenly darted into view. "There you are," he scolded. A pinkish light seemed to fill the orb. "Where were you?" The orb blushed. He blinked again. "Mariah," he sighed, "when I said stay back, I didn't mean stay back and stare at my rear." Mariah turned bright red. "Never mind," he said impatiently. "There's a girl inside. She's very important to me. Can you make sure she doesn't get hurt by anything?"

Mariah bobbed up and down excitedly before darting through a crack in the wall. He sighed again. He hated working with wind spirits. Unfortunately, he didn't need much more and he couldn't risk being detected by a talent who just happened to have a touch of magic in him.

* * *

**2:00 am, Saito Mansion**

Sakura and Nagi slipped out of their room, intent on getting a late night snack before turning in to bed. As they passed the library, they could make out Brad, Schuldig and Farfarello sitting (or sprawling in some cases) in the chairs scattered throughout the room. Sakura pursed her lips slightly as she hurried after Nagi into the kitchen.

"How much food do we have?" she asked as she walked up to the kinetic.

"Plenty," he said in surprise. "Why do you ask?"

"Well, everyone's so gloomy," she said carefully, trying to put into words what she was feeling. "It's understandable, really," she continued, "what with Ran and Schatten and Crashers heading out, but still." She nodded to herself. "I doubt they've eaten for hours, so we should feed them."

She quickly directed Nagi to help her prepare a pot of tea and put together a tray of light snacks. Schuldig, alerted to the sudden activity, left the library to give them a hand. He passed Nagi as the boy walked past with a large pot of tea and several cups floating behind him as he carried a small stack of napkins and assorted silverware.

Sakura jumped slightly when she saw the German enter the kitchen. Of all the members of Schwarz, he was the only one who made her nervous. Still…

"Are you all right?" she asked carefully.

Schuldig looked at her in surprise. He'd been so busy these past few hours making sure that Ran didn't kill Brad, that Yuushi didn't kill Nagi, that Brad didn't kill Brad that he hadn't had time to consider how Aya-chan's kidnapping was affecting him or Sakura, for that matter.

"I'll be fine," he answered with a slight grin. "Aya-chan will be back twisting Brad around her fingers in no time."

Sakura giggled slightly as she handed him a tray of food to carry to the library.

Brad gave her a morose look as she entered.

"Really," she said in exasperation. "Stop sulking this instant, Brad Crawford. Aya-chan is fine." Sakura paused for a moment, her brow furrowing. "She's fine," she repeated, so much certainty in her voice that the others could only stare at her.

"In fact," she continued, apparently unaware of the strange looks she was receiving, "we'll be hearing from Manx very soon."

* * *

**2:27 am**

"Ran?"

Said owner of that name looked up. He and Schatten were checking the first floor of the warehouse for Esset agents. So far, they hadn't found anything. His eyes were narrowed as he considered the possibility of a trap.

"Ran?"

Yuushi again. Starting to sound a bit hysterical, at that.

Sighing softly, the red-haired telepath did a quick sweep of the area. He frowned again. The only minds besides the Kritiker teams were the guards they had found unconscious and tied up.

"Ran! Would you please get up here?"

Abyssinian looked up with growing alarm and darted up the stairs. Considering how much he and Yuushi had argued during his time with Crashers…for him to be wailing like that…

He froze as he took in the blood covered room that lay before him. Even when you were in the business, carnage at this level was highly unusual.

"Where is she," he asked urgently, eyes sweeping from one side of the room to another.

"Ick," Ken said as he walked up behind Ran. "Is it my imagination or are those bits and pieces of people scattered amongst the blood?"

"Yeah," Yohji said as he sauntered in. "There are a few fingers over in the corner and over there," he craned his neck for a moment, then his face paled dramatically. "Oh, that must have hurt" he muttered, face now turning slightly green.

"Where is she," Ran repeated, panic starting to fill him and sweeping out to the others.

"Ran, look at this," Reiichi said as he walked through a door that had been hidden in the darkness. Ran quickly picked his way through the bloody room to the doorframe. "Have you ever seen anything like that?" the leader of Crashers asked carefully.

Ran followed the other man's gaze to an oval on the ground that was perfectly clean. It was also the size of a human body. One the size of his sister, actually.

The entire room leapt a foot as the long-forgotten cell phone in Ran's pocket rang. His hand clutched the small device for a moment as he tried to get his frantic heart beat under control. Finally, he pulled it out and answered it.

"She's safe, Ran," Nagi said on the other end. "She's at the-AHHHH!"

Ran's face paled dramatically when the younger hacker screamed. "What is it?" he demanded urgently.

"Brad's driving like a maniac," the kinetic whimpered.

"Like a bat out of hell," Farfarello called.

Ran pulled the phone away from his ear slightly as wild cursing suddenly erupted from the device.

"Let me talk to Schu," he demanded when he could finally make himself heard.

"If Brad had driven like this yesterday," the German gulped as he took the phone. "Yohji wouldn't have had a chance."

"What happened?" Ran demanded through gritted teeth.

"Well, Sakura was going on about how Aya-chan was fine when the phone rang. It was Manx. Just like Sakura said it would be. We're checking her for talent in a few days, by the way. Manx told us that Aya-chan had been dropped off at the Magic Bus Hospital by, well, somebody. She's still trying to get that little factoid out of the nurse."

"Magic Bus," Ran repeated.

"Yeah, we just arrived," the other telepath said dryly. "New record. Five minutes when it should take fifteen."

Ran snapped the phone shut.

'_Everyone grab on, **now**_,'he snapped.

Schatten hurried over, grabbing the men of Crashers as they did so. They couldn't risk anyone getting left behind, after all.

* * *

**2:35 am**

Manx rubbed her temples as she tried to sort out just what Nurse Auska had seen when Aya-chan had been dropped off.

"He just walked in," the nurse gasped, her arms swinging dramatically. "He was wearing this blue armor that matched his blue hair and his blue eyes and the glowing blue ball and the girl was blue, well almost, and he put her down on one of the blue stretchers and they took her to the blue room with blue lights and blue curtains and-"

"Where is she, woman?" Brad demanded as he shot through the doors, the rest of Schwarz on his tail.

"The blue girl?"

The rest of Schatten and Crashers appeared behind Schwarz.

"More blue people!"

"Nurse Auska," Manx said tiredly, "why don't you go lie down for a bit?"

"Not in the blue room," the nurse said timidly.

"No, why don't we find you a red room?"

"How about a white room?" Nagi muttered.

"With some nice padded walls," Sakura added.

"Those are fun," Farfarello said thoughtfully.

"Where is she?" Ran snarled, his violet eyes blazing in a way that was reminiscent of Aya the assassin/florist.

"Room 216," Manx said as she shepherded the blue-obsessed nurse towards the lounge. The way Schatten took off, one would have thought they were in the Olympics. Crashers looked at each other, at the hospital, shrugged and followed. There was no point in trying to understand anymore.

As the assassins approached the door to room 216, they slowed down, trying not to make too much noise. Ran and Brad reached the door first, with Schuldig right behind them.

Grasping the door knob, Ran quietly pushed the door open and slipped in. Inside Aya-chan lay on the hospital bed, her eyes closed, the heart rate monitor beeping steadily and an IV line coming out of her arm.

Brad and Schuldig quickly grabbed an arm each as the assassin's legs gave way beneath him like a new born foal's. Nagi pushed a chair under him and then turned to glare threateningly at the others. They quickly backed away from the door, leaving the three men alone.

Brad glanced over at Schuldig. _'Find her doctor',_ he quickly sent, _'and find out what her condition is.'_

The German nodded quickly before closing his eyes to sort through the plethora of minds in the hospital.

'_Got it,'_ he suddenly grunted. His eyes opened once more to meet Ran's. _'She's fine. They drugged her, so we just have to wait for the drugs to wear off. She should be up within the hour.'_

Ran's shoulders slumped in relief. When he'd first entered, his mind had flashed back to those two long years when she'd been in a coma. He couldn't handle that again. He couldn't.

'_You don't have to,'_ Schuldig said reassuringly. _'She's fine. She'll be awake in less than an hour. You'll see.'_

Nagi walked forward and placed a silent hand on Ran's shoulder. The other assassins crept in silently, prepared to wait as long as it took for her to wake up.

Finally, just as Crashers settled themselves in the cramped room, she stirred slightly.

Her bed was immediately surrounded by a dozen concerned men and one concerned girl.

Her eyes opened.

She blinked, trying to focus her eyes. She blinked again when she saw…everyone.

"Oh dear."

Brad sighed in relief even as his eyes rolled in their sockets. He reached down and patted her hand.

"We really need to talk about when it's appropriate to use that phrase."

* * *

**7:00 am**

Aya-chan swatted her brother's arm and then Brad's.

"I'm perfectly fine, I'll have you know," she said tartly.

"Yes, ma'am," Ran said blandly. "It's not like you were kidnapped and drugged and saved by some mysterious hero. And it's not as if when we came looking for you, we found a building drenched in blood and body parts, oh, except for where you were lying, apparently. No, there was a perfectly clear spot where you had been, a perfect oval. Then we find you lying in a hospital bed, drugged to the gills and then, poof! You're fine! Walking out, when you shouldn't even be able to talk coherently." He paused for a moment, looking over at Brad. "Anything you would like to add?"

"No, I think you covered it," the precog said calmly. "Well, except for the abuse of the phrase 'oh dear'."

"At least Crasher's volunteered to pick our cars up," Ran sighed as his new Challenger came into view.

"Yeah, then they bolted," Schuldig added cheerfully.

"Can you blame them?" Ken asked incredulously.

Ran grimaced slightly. "Not really."

"So have my valiant knights decided who I'm riding with?" She asked tartly.

Brad and Ran shared a glance. They then looked at Aya-chan, then at the cars and then back at each other.

"I am."  
"Brad."

Schuldig muffled a snicker. Aya-chan stared at them in astonishment. They had agreed. On something involving her.

Meanwhile, Nagi and Yohji were howling with hysterical laughter. Omi and Ken were trying to muffle their snickers while Farfarello shook his head.

* * *

**7:25, Koneko**

Schatten stumbled into the Koneko, trudging slowly up the stairs to the third floor.

"Get Sakura fresh sheets," Aya-chan called over her shoulder as Brad ushered her to her room. Farfarello, who had been following, quickly darted into the spare bedroom to grab new linens and help Sakura get settled.

Ken plodded after them, carrying Sakura's duffle bag and backpack. He set them down next to her bed.

"Thank you," she said softly. "I could have gotten home, but thanks for letting me use the spare room."

"S'not spare," Ken yawned. "S'yours. Nigh'." With that, he left.

Sakura blinked in surprise. They'd set this room aside for her?

Farfarello finished making the bed (including neat looking hospital corners) and said his own soft 'good night' before slipping out as well.

Sakura glanced out the door when a flash of red caught her eye. Realizing that it was Ran, she quickly poked her head out the door.

Ran paused, turning slightly when he heard a soft female voice call his name.

"Ran," she said a bit timidly. "I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate everything you've done and that I'll get out of your way as soon as possible. I'll leave the room just like it was when I got here-"

"Sakura," he said softly, "this room really is yours. Aya-chan decorated it with you in mind so you could have it. You really are a part of this family, so of course you would get your own room."

The slender girl looked at him with obvious surprise.

He gave her a slight smile. "Think about it. Ever since we first met, you've kept our secrets, you've tried to help whenever you could in any way you could." He paused for a moment, silently weighing his next words. "Kritiker has noticed," he finally said. "And I know they're interested in you becoming one of their agents. Not a field agent," he added quickly, "but supporting like Manx and Birman and Aya-chan. You're welcome to stay as long as you need to."

"Oh," she said, feeling a blush creeping across her face.

He nodded slightly. "Sleep well, Sakura," he said before walking off.

She smiled at his back as she shut her door.

* * *

Ran, after what seemed like an eternity, reached his own room. As he opened the door, he could see Schuldig sitting on the edge of the bed, his arms resting on is legs and his head bowed. Ran frowned, quickly shutting the door behind him.

"Schu?" he asked softly. "Are you alright?"

"I should have been there," the German muttered in a strained voice. "What's the point of being a telepath if I can't watch over the people that are important to me? I should have noticed them. I should have! I know them, what they feel like…I used to be them," he whispered with a shudder.

Ran raised an eyebrow. _'In case you've forgotten,'_ he sent, _'I'm also a telepath and I didn't feel them. I didn't even realize that something had happened until the call came.'_

Schuldig looked up, his eyes haunted.

"I failed her. I failed _her_ again," he whispered. "I couldn't protect her. Why can't I ever protect her? Why do I always fail?"

Ran quickly climbed onto the bed behind the German and wrapped his arms around the other man's shoulders.

"I don't blame you and neither does Aya-chan. No one blames, you. There's no blame to assign," he whispered. "This is part of our lives, the darker side that we need to learn to deal with. We can't do what we do and expect to be completely immune to any kind of personal attacks." He grasped the other's shoulders, pulling him around so that they were eye to eye. "Stop blaming yourself."

Schuldig felt something relax inside him, tension starting to drain from his body with the last of his adrenalin.

Ran looked at him carefully. "You need sleep," he finally said.

Schu felt a grin stretch across his face. "You're one to talk. You've been running around all night while I was being waited on hand and foot by thoughtful sixteen year-olds."

Ran snorted. "Hit the lights. You're closer."

"Yeah right, Mr. Gestalt."

* * *

_**Edited July 3, 2006: **_

_**Dialogue throughout edited to match standards of later chapters as well as plot lines developed at a later date. For a further explanation, see our Live Journal.**_

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_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http/ silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	25. Kryptonite Boxes

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twenty-four – Kryptonite Boxes**

_Story by Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

* * *

**Koneko, Brad's room, 9:00 pm**

"Really, Brad," Aya-chan said in obvious irritation, "I'm perfectly fine! In fact," she added pointedly, "I'm probably in better health than you are right now."

Brad winced slightly. The stress of having to sit out on rescuing Aya-chan had not done his blood pressure any good.

"You need to be thinking about these things more," she continued. "If you keep going the way you are, you're going to have serious medical problems later!"

"You try dealing with the various 'people' I have to on a daily basis," he muttered.

She gave him a level look. "I do."

He sighed softly, running a hand through his hair. "That's not what I meant," he grumbled.

Aya-chan gave him an exasperated look and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I do appreciate you taking me out tonight."

Brad smiled slightly, pulling her closer. "I was quite happy to," he replied.

"Even if it was just a walk in the park. With many breaks. Lots of water. And being constantly asked if I wanted to rest or if I felt all right."

Brad pushed her back, crossing his arms in front of his chest and giving her a pointed look. "You were kidnapped and drugged. You should be taking it easy."

Aya-chan grinned, "Oh really," she asked, eyes dancing. "Would you still think I need to take it easy if I were to do, oh, say, THIS!"

With that, she leapt at him, knocking him onto his back on his bed, expert fingers finding his ribs and beginning to tickle him mercilessly.

Brad suppressed a yelp, trying to twist away from her. Aya-chan's face glowed in triumph as the ever-intimidating leader of Schatten began to laugh helplessly. She dove at him again, her fingers finding the sensitive spots on his ribs, sides, neck, arms, legs, whatever she could reach.

Her victim lay helpless beneath her, gasping for breath between gales of helpless laughter. Finally, he roused enough air to speak. "Fine! Uncle! I give up! White flag! Mercy!"

Aya-chan's hands stilled, fingers tapping slightly on his sides. "Mercy?" she asked with a raised eyebrow. "I'll have to think about it. Answer me this – are we done with the kid gloves? Have you stopped thinking of me as a porcelain doll?"

"Yeah," he gasped, chest heaving as he tried to steady his breath, "you tough Texas woman, got it."

"Good," she said with a grin as she stretched out on top of him. He wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her tight.

"They wouldn't let me come," he said suddenly. "Not Kritiker," he quickly added. "They said not to, but, well, I was still going to come. The others, they wouldn't let me."

Aya-chan gave him a patient look. "I know," she said softly. "They all told me that."

"Oh, they did, did they?" he growled slightly.

"Of course. I was holding dinner hostage."

Brad laughed. "I take it that was when I had a meeting at Kritiker headquarters?"

"When you stormed it, you mean?" she asked innocently.

"Well, when your tracking device suddenly stops sending data they should notice." He nodded to himself in satisfaction. "They will notice if something like this ever happens again. Anywhere."

Aya-chan looked at him levelly. "And then there was the information they were withholding on Esset activity in Japan."

"We will be informed as soon as they have something new," he replied easily. "We'll also be informed if they locate those Esset agents that escaped from the warehouse you were in."

"The ones that were found by nii-san and the others," Aya-chan asked.

"Exactly. When Ran teleported everyone out, there was no one left to watch them. Besides," he added, "they were on a retrieval mission. They had no capacity for transporting prisoners."

"Very true," she murmured thoughtfully. They fell into silence for a few minutes before Brad spoke again.

"Aya-chan, you are the light of my life and the joy of my existence."

"Damn right," she replied and leaned down to kiss him.

Things had begun to progress quite rapidly when the door suddenly slammed open.

"Hey, Brad, the EEG machines are…here…aw hell."

Aya-chan rolled off her fiancé red-faced. Brad sat up and leveled a glare of pure, murderous rage at Schuldig.

"Thank you very much," he said through clenched teeth. "You may go now."

The German gulped softly and quickly stepped out of the room, pulling the door closed behind him. Once outside, he leaned mournfully against the wall. 'I'm gunna lose the bet now,' he thought sulkily.

* * *

**Koneko Briefing Room, The Great Search – Day One, 10 am**

"As you are all aware," Brad began from his seat on his throne/chair, "my visions have become unreliable over the past few months. Fortunately, there is a way to stop it." He looked out over the faces of Schatten, a grim look on his face. "The Koneko will not be opened this week. For emergency maintenance, I suppose. In reality, however, we will be testing each and every person in this room so that we can find out just who is blocking my visions."

"Who? What do you mean who?" Yohji asked in surprise.

"It has to be a who," Schuldig said dryly. "We've ruled everything else out."

"What exactly will you be testing for?" Ken asked in faint alarm.

"Talent. Psychic abilities. Whatever you want to call it," Nagi explained. "The ability to block one person's Talent so randomly has to be the result of another kind of Talent."

Far looked at the younger hacker in surprise. "You can check for Talent? How? Does it have anything to do with the 3 EEG machines sitting in Brad's office?"

"Yes, you can," Nagi replied. "Anyone with Talent emits a distinctive brainwave pattern at all times. Use of Talent merely increases the strength and number of certain brain waves being emitted. There are five types of brainwaves – delta, theta, alpha, beta and gamma.

Delta waves increase to decrease awareness of the physical world. The more aware of the physical world, the fewer delta waves. In normal humans, delta waves are only present during sleep or if someone has Attention Deficit Disorder.

Theta waves are linked to intuition, daydreaming and emotions. It's highly integrated into systems such as the limbic systems, which is mainly responsible for integrating emotional states with stored memories of physical sensations. Theta waves are observed during anxiety, behavioral activation and behavioral inhibition.

Alpha waves signify a bridge between the conscious mind and the subconscious. They are present when in a good mood and account for senses of calmness. They also allow a person to see the world objectively.

Beta waves are present during active conversations, debates or any time information must be processed at high speeds. The higher the mental activity, the more alert you are the more beta waves.

Finally, we have Gamma waves. Gamma waves are linked to problem solving, fear and being conscious. If you aren't conscious, you aren't emitting gamma waves. If you are having to process several different sources of information at the same time, gamma waves increase."

Nagi paused, ready to continue when the glazed looks left the eyes of his teammates. He raised an eyebrow slightly before speaking. "There will be a test." He shook his head when no one responded. "I don't see any reason to go over the specific variations of each Talent, but basically, each type of Talent, precognition, telepathy, empathy, etc., emit their own specific frequency all the time. That frequency increases it's output when their Talent is in use. There are also slight variations in each frequency. If you have two precogs, the stronger one will probably have a higher Alpha output."

"We'll be starting up tomorrow so you have time to go back over this information and ask questions if you do so desire. The scanning will be totally non-invasive," Brad interrupted while shooting Nagi a look that clearly told him to curb his lecture.

Nagi blinked, shaking his head slightly in confusion. He wasn't quite sure why everyone was looking at him oddly. This was interesting stuff. Not to mention entirely relevant to their very existence! "Uh, well, any questions?" he asked weakly.

"Just, uh, when will we be tested," Yohji asked carefully.

"We'll be doing two people a day. Ran and Schu will be first. They'll need time to recover plus we'll need their help going over the data. The next day will be myself and Far, followed by Omi and Ken, Yohji and Sakura and ending with Aya-chan."

"Um, I don't mean to interrupt," Sakura interrupted meekly from her position on the couch, "but why do you need to check **me** for Talent?"

"After your little moment in Saito Mansion?" Schuldig asked incredulously. "Do you really think we'd just let that go?"

"We're checking everyone," Brad added. "As we've seen with Ran, Talent can be lurking in the most unexpected people."

Ran raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Are you saying that I'm not good enough to be a part of your little…club?"

"Oh, stop it, both of you," Aya-chan said in amusement. "Keep picking at each other and I'm sending you to your rooms."

"I'd pay to see that," Yohji said with obvious amusement.

"I'm sure you would," Ran muttered, cringing slightly, "but it wouldn't be pretty." Aya-chan merely smirked.

"Why am I the one pointing out just how off-topic we've gotten?" Schuldig demanded. "I want to know exactly what the chibi meant when he said that Ran and I would need time to recover. If this is completely safe, why do any of us need recovery time?"

"You're going to have to drop your shields," Nagi said carefully. "That's why we're doing this in Brad's office. The shielding around it is the strongest in the Koneko, save for the first aid room."

"Then why don't we do it in the first aid room?" the German demanded.

"We need to run cables from the computer room so we can record the data and not have to repeat tests," Nagi explained.

"And we don't have cables long enough to run around corners and down two flights of stairs," Omi piped in.

"We're not having cables wrapped all around the Koneko," Ken said in alarm. "That's just asking for it. Someone will get electrocuted, die and it'll be blamed on me. I don't want that. In fact, I'm taking steps to keep it from happening! Executive decision, right now! We set up in Brad's office!"

"I didn't know you had executive powers," Yohji teased.

Ken made a rude gesture.

"Children," Brad said dryly, "could we please focus on the matter at hand?"

"What is your obsession with focus?" Far demanded. "Anytime we start having fun, you start demanding we focus. You're completely ignoring the fact that we are focusing! Maybe not on what you want us to focus on, but we are focusing!"

"Why," Ran interrupted, a faint pleading note in his voice, "do we need to drop our shields? If there's a major accident or something close enough, we'll be out of it for days."

"The shields interfere with the readings," Schuldig suddenly said. "They mentioned that at Rosenkreuz once. The shields are to keep others out, but also us in. Especially telepaths."

"You're very focused today," Brad murmured in surprise.

"Suck-up," Farfarello muttered softly.

"Hey, if I'm hanging my brain out to dry, I want to be damn sure there's a good reason for it!"

"Very admirable," Brad said. "Keep it up, please." He looked around the room. "If there's nothing left to discuss, I believe we may now return to…whatever it was you were doing. No details, please, Kudoh."

"Hey!"

* * *

**Brad's office, The Great Search – Day Two, 9 am**

"So, how long do we have to sit here?" Schuldig asked plaintively.

"Not as long as I have to," Brad grumbled.

"What we need," Nagi began, "is a base reading on your Talents. You and Ran need to talk, out-loud and then telepathically so we can get a base-line reading. We'll also need you to start teleporting," he added, turning to Ran. "Since we have the machines, we should go ahead and get a reading. Don't leave the room, but do everything up to 'porting out. And if you could use a gestalt so we can get reading on that, we'll have everything we'll need in case of severe head injury."

"How comforting," Ran said dryly.

"But that doesn't answer my question," Schu interrupted. "How. Long."

"Until Brad has a vision."

Schuldig collapsed into a chair. "Mein Gott, we'll be here for days."

A look of annoyance on his face, Brad decided to clear a few things up. "Precogs typically experience a number of visions everyday. Since mine have been dropping off noticeably, it's safe to assume that whomever it is blocking the big visions has branched out to include most of my visions."

"But if we don't have a baseline for a vision, how do we know you're having one?" Ran asked with narrowed eyes.

"We have a baseline from the Rosenkreuz files," Nagi explained. "Plus, we'll see his brainwaves start to shift when a vision arrives. After that, well, we'll see."

"Then we should probably get started," Ran said calmly as he moved to a chair. "Don't want to let Brad get ahead of us, after all."

* * *

**Computer room, 11 pm**

"Are you sure you need us here," Schuldig muttered, a slightly pained expression on his face. "I'm not like Mr. Masochist over there. I **don't** function well when I'm in pain."

"Shut up," Ran said fiercely, his own pounding headache driving him to be even more irritable than usual.

"Nagi and Omi need to keep up with their school work. Plus, this is something you should know how to read," Brad calmly explained.

Nagi looked at the two telepaths with large, vulnerable eyes. "We'll need your help when it comes time for Omi and I to be scanned," he said tiredly.

'_Shit, he's better at that than Omi,' _Schuldig muttered silent.

'_Of course,'_ Ran replied. _'He doesn't realize he's doing it and we know he doesn't.'_

"Fine, fine," Schuldig finally said. "Don't get all weepy, now. You'll smudge the charts and I'm not going to sit around like that again to fix it."

* * *

**Brad's office, The Great Search – Day Three, 9 am**

"So what kind of readings did you get on our two resident telepaths?" Farfarello asked curiously.

"What we expected," Nagi said as he fiddled with the sensors affixed to his skull. "High Beta readings for both of them and slightly elevated Gamma readings. And Ran's Gamma readings increased dramatically when teleporting and in gestalt."

"And Braddikins?"

"Call me that again and we'll start praying before meals," Brad growled from behind his desk. "I remember some very moving ones from the ranch back in Texas. In fact," he continued thoughtfully, "I think I can even improvise a few."

"Someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

Schuldig smacked the Irish man upside the head. "No teasing the man who has to face a cold bed every night."

Ran frowned over at them. "Don't make me hit you," he warned. "Besides," he continued with some relish, "it's better for his health this way."

The German snickered softly.

"Enough," Oracle snarled. "Finish hooking up the sensors and get out!"

* * *

**Computer room, 12:30 am**

"At least it's not Far," Schuldig said in relief as he carefully untaped the Irish man's print-out. "Can you imagine what we'd have had to do if he'd been the one?"

"I'm trying very hard not to think about it," Brad muttered testily.

"But we do have an explanation for his general randomness and strange obsessions," Ran added.

"We do?"

"Slight increase in the Delta and Theta waves. Further explanation is very technical. You want to hear it?" the younger telepath asked innocently.

"No, I do not," Schuldig snapped. "It's sickening. You're rubbing off on Nagi and he's rubbing off on you. Just exchange personalities and get it over with!"

"What, you can't handle us?" Nagi asked in amusement.

"Shut it, chibi."

"But I thought this was what you wanted!"

The German gave him a dark look and began stalking towards him menacingly.

Ran stepped between them and gave the other telepath a flat look. "Really now, beating up someone half your size?"

"Half my-" Schuldig sputtered, "that…he can bend me in…he started it!"

"Then you finish it," Brad finally snapped, "without, I might add, violence or the use of threats."

"Then what's left?"

"Leaving?" Nagi suggested. "Giving up? Crying uncle? Giving in?"

"I may give up but I'll never give in!"

"Just keep telling yourself that," Nagi said dryly.

* * *

**Brad's Office, The Great Search – Day Four, 9 am**

"What are you going to do to if it's one of us blocking your visions?" Omi asked with a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"I haven't decided yet," Brad snapped. "But you can be sure that with everything you've put me through, it will be painful. Excruciatingly painful."

Omi's face went white. Ken merely looked resigned. The soccer player looked at the other assassin. "Don't worry," he said mournfully, "if it's going to be either one of us, it'll be me. Remember Murphy?"

Omi's lips twitched slightly. "It'd be rather hard to forget considering that something's happened to you or around you every day so far."

"Shut up," Ken snapped. "At least I have the sense not to try anything with Ran's sister."

Omi's laughter died in his throat when he heard the sound of a clip slamming into place. He turned his head slightly, face paling when he saw that Brad was aiming directly at Ken's head.

"Oracle," Nagi interrupted, "you'll damage the equipment."

"And?"

* * *

**Computer room, 11:30**

"Well, looks like Ken has nothing to worry about," Schuldig said cheerfully.

"Hmph."

"Don't sulk, Oracle, it's not becoming," Ran teased. He looked back down at Omi and Ken's printouts. "I expect Ken and Omi will both be pleased to hear that they're both completely normal. No trace of Talent anywhere."

Schuldig pretended to sniff. "Normal. I'd almost forgotten what it was like. It's so beautiful!"

"I can still shoot you," Brad scowled.

* * *

**Brad's Office, The Great Search – Day Five, 9 am**

"Come on, Yotan, wake up," Omi said shaking the lanky assassin's shoulder. "We need you awake to get the readings."

"You want me to sit in an office," Yohji yawned, "with Brad Crawford for how many hours? And you want me to be awake?"

"If you fall asleep," Nagi threatened, "you should probably know that I've programmed the sensors to deliver a rather high voltage shock."

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, yes he would," Schuldig irritably corrected. "Him and Ran are working on trading personalities. If you think Ran's capable of it, then so's the chibi."

Nagi looked at him in exasperation. "I still don't see the problem."

"One Ran's bad enough," the German retorted. "I don't want a five foot version running around bending spoons with his mind."

"So should I start bending you instead?"

"Well, he's already bent out of shape," Sakura suddenly interrupted. "Maybe you could bend him back."

Nagi looked at her in surprise as a wide grin began to slide across his face. The young sprinter blushed as Brad Crawford burst out laughing. All Schuldig could do was glare.

* * *

**Computer room, 2:30 am**

"Well, I'm stumped," Nagi said wearily. "It doesn't match anything."

"Check again," Brad snapped.

"We've checked three times," Omi complained. "It's not going to change just because you're trying to be scary."

"The important thing is," Ran pointed out as he rubbed his temple with one hand, "it's not the problem. We know that the small increase in Theta waves hints at a very small precognitive ability."

"Yeah but that means Yohji has it too," Nagi pointed out worriedly.

"A wave that small," Brad began, "means Sakura and Yohji don't get much more than hunches or premonitions."

"Great," Schuldig said sarcastically. "All we have to worry about now are the strange Delta waves."

Ran shook his head, "No, they match up too well with the Theta waves. They're synchronizing so much that we need to worry about both of them."

"But since they're almost always present, they can't be what's blocking Brad's visions," Nagi continued.

"Plus, the two printouts are almost identical," Omi pointed out. "In all the data we pulled from Rosenkreuz, we have yet to see anything remotely resembling this."

Brad sighed softly and shook his head. "We'll worry about it later. We aren't going to get any farther tonight. You both need sleep," he said giving both hackers a stern look. "I'm very aware of how much time you've spent on this and how much time you're spending on your schoolwork. You've handled the strain admirably but I want you to go to bed."

* * *

**Brad's Office, The Great Search – Day Six, 10 am**

"Who set our clocks back?" Nagi demanded.

"I did," said Aya-chan in amusement. "Brad said you needed the sleep."

"But…" Omi looked at her with large eyes. "Our clocks?"

"I may not be an assassin," she said pointedly, "but I do know how to sneak in and out of a room. I did have a brother and younger cousin who would appear on our doorstep randomly." She paused for a moment before casting an exasperated glace all around the room. "Why does everyone assume I was an angel growing up? Nii-san and Toma may have been hoodlums, but I was the one always getting them out of things." She gave Ran a pointed look. "Remember my hairdryer? The one that started shoot flames from every opening and crack?"

"That was Toma's fault!" Ran insisted. "I was studying for that big test, remember?"

"Then how did he get to it? He would never come into my room! And that's where my hairdryer was! My room! In a drawer! In my dresser!"

"You underestimate his desire to perfect blue fire. And we were not hoodlums! Adventuresome, yes, extremely curious, yes, hoodlums, no!"

Aya-chan could only stare. "What does my hairdryer have to do with that blasted blue fire? And didn't he promise Mom that he'd stop experimenting after the tool shed blew up?"

"It had something to do with the heating coil inside. Don't ask me to explain."

As the two continued to bicker back and forth, Omi leaned over to Nagi and whispered, "Let's make sure this Toma never meets Naru of Crashers."

"Agreed," Nagi whispered back. "What's blue fire anyways?"

* * *

**Dining room, 12:30 pm**

Ken leaned back with a soft sigh of contentment as he finished off their ice cream. Omi grinned at him from across the table. "I'm kinda glad that we're not Talented," he said.

"Yeah, if Schatten's to maintain it's status as a unique team, it needs diversity," Ken agreed.

"Diversity's a good thing," Omi nodded.

"Yup."

Ken picked up the folded newspaper sitting on the table, glancing at the article on the cover. "Looks like they still don't know what caused all those power surges last week," he commented.

"You mean the ones that blew the traffic lights?" Omi asked curiously.

"Yeah," Ken peered at the article for a moment. "Still can't believe no one got hurt. Just a few fender benders when people got impatient."

Yohji, on his way to the kitchen, turned and plucked the paper from Ken's hands. "Hey, this paper is a week old!" he exclaimed. "Why's it still in the house? Aya-chan decide to start clipping coupons or something?"

Omi looked at him in exasperation. "It wouldn't have anything to do with how busy we've been this past week?" He blinked in surprise. "Yohji? Where are you going?"

Ignoring the perky blonde, Yohji quickly walked over to Brad's office and opened the door. "Hey, great leader, our race made the…" his voice trailed off as he beheld the empty room. "Boss man?" He sighed softly before spinning on his heels and marching towards the computer room. If he didn't find anyone there, he'd just have to wait.

Pushing the door open, he could hear voices murmuring softly. "Jackpot," he muttered. Pulling the paper out from under his arm, he marching into the room.

"Why's everyone so glum?" he asked merrily, "We made the news!"

"What are you babbling about now, Kudoh," Crawford snapped.

"Don't snap at him, Brad," Aya-chan said in a strained voice.

Looking at them in surprise, Yohji held up the paper. "Just thought you'd find it amusing to know that our race got some attention. Well," he amended, "the resulting power surges got attention. And the blown traffic lights…and the minor fender-benders…yeah, that's about it." He looked at them thoughtfully. "I take it you found something?"

"We're fixing to find out," Nagi said quietly as he pulled the last printout from the printer.

Yohji stared at the group for a moment, sudden understanding striking him like lightning. "You're a Talent," he said staring at Aya-chan. Her face was pale as she looked back at him. "It's not fair," he continued, "you're not even genetically related to Ran and you're pulling the same stunt!" He shook his head, staring at the ceiling. "What is it with your family? There's Mr. TAKATORI SHI-NE! over there, you're doing your thing…" he eyed Brad for a moment, a slight grin on his face. "Never seen someone so capable of wrapping so many people around their fingers." His eyes slid back to Ran. "And I heard about your cousin. The one obsessed with blue fire?"

He started pacing up and down the room, waving the still-folded newspaper in his hand like a fan. "What the hell is blue fire? What is it with your family? Was there something in the water? Some strange pollen?"

Ran suddenly appeared in Yohji's path, arms crossed and noticeably irritated. "Well, you should get the water checked where you grew up. According to the printouts, you're a Talent too."

Yohji stared at Ran in surprise, suddenly realizing that he'd crossed a line. He winced and turned to look at the stunned group gathered around the table behind the computers. "Sorry," he muttered.

Aya-chan leaned out, grasping Yohji's arm and pulling him into the group. "I know this is hard," she said softly. "We'll get through this, all of us. We'll do it together." Her lips quirked suddenly. "And if you ever meet Toma, don't ask about the blue fire. He'll drag you into his experiments. One of them left him and Ran both with bright purple fingernails. The girls at school kept asking where he'd gotten the nail polish."

Yohji's lips twitched at the idea of a young, purple-nailed Ran. He looked at the young girl and let a loose grin cross his face. "Thanks," he said.

Unnoticed by the crowd in the room, Omi slipped in and hurried over to the computers. He was supposed to be here, after all.

"Yeah, fine, guys?" Nagi's voice suddenly broke in. "Can we….focus?"

"What, three personalities now? We going for a record?" Schuldig demanded.

"Well, if I end up with too many, I'll just add yours. That should negate four or five right there."

"Children," Brad broke in, noticeable frazzled, "Focus!"

"For fifty points, what was the most-used word this week?" Omi beamed. "Focus!"

"What did you find, Nagi," Ran asked desperately.

"High Alpha and Theta waves," he said. "A pattern that can only be empathic. The level of synchronization between them," he continued pointing to the relevant points on the chart, "is an indication of how strong her abilities are and, more noticeably, her mental shields."

"And this?" Brad asked pointed at the Gamma waves.

"A kinetic pattern," Ran realized.

"Yes," Nagi said.

"So what exactly are you saying here," Schuldig demanded. "Can she move stuff around like you? I mean, I remember what you were like when you first joined Schwarz. One temper tantrum and the furniture was shooting through the roof." Nagi's face reddened noticeable. "I mean, Aya-chan isn't nearly the cry…I mean as emotional as you were, but I think we'd have been noticing things at least once a month."

Another chart suddenly unfolded itself next to Aya-chan's. "Look at this," the telekinetic said. "On my chart, you can see a major increase in Gamma waves. There's also a slight elevation of the Theta waves because of how closely my emotions affect my power. On Aya-chan's chart, however" he continued, "you can see the same patterns and that they're just as strong, but they're also much smaller and a lot more controlled."

Schuldig grumbled to himself for a moment. "Can you repeat that in a language other than Geek?"

"Nagi works on the Macro level and Aya-chan on the Micro level," Yohji explained. Everyone stared at him in surprise. "What?" he demanded. "It makes sense. Nagi works with the stuff we can see. Aya-chan works _small_. She's just as strong and since we don't see feathers or dirt floating around, whatever she's moving has to be even smaller. Hence, Micro."

Nagi looked pleased. "That is the same conclusion I came to when I saw this pattern appearing on the computer screen. I went back into Aya-chan's medical records and found something very interesting."

A file suddenly flew from a nearby cabinet and flew to the group gathered around the table. "The agents who kidnapped Aya-chan dosed her with chloroform. Chloroform is extremely dangerous."

"Ten percent of the population is deathly allergic to it," Omi added. "Plus, with how much it takes to knock someone out, it's frighteningly easy to get overdosed with it. And it's usually lethal when that happens."

"You were exactly right when you said that she shouldn't be walking out of the hospital," Nagi continued looking at Ran. "She literally shouldn't have been able to walk out at that point, not so quickly. Chloroform is extremely potent and extremely dangerous."

"So it's nothing like what you see in the movies," Yohji asked with a wince.

"No," chimed the two hackers.

"So what exactly are you saying," Brad demanded. "What do the Gamma waves show us?"

"That Aya-chan can manipulate cells on a microscopic level. She is literally a micro-kinetic. She can repair her own body, self-heal. Once she learns how to control this ability, she can become one of the best doctors in Japan, or even, the world."

"It's all my fault," Aya-chan's voice suddenly broke in. Everyone turned to look at her in surprise. "I'm the one blocking Brad's visions. I'm the reason everyone's been getting so badly hurt. It's…me."

'_Ah,'_ Schuldig grumbled to Ran, _'the infamous Fujimiya self-inflicted guilt trip. I blame you.'_

'_Shut it,_' Ran sent back with a silent snarl. "Aya," he said in a gentle voice, "do you want people to get hurt?"

"Of course not," she said in horror, her eyes wide.

"Then it isn't your fault. You didn't decide this, your subconscious did. You were probably trying to protect us."

"Protect you?" she demanded, her voice hard. "How? By getting kidnapped? By letting Brad fall into an orchestra pit? By possibly preventing Brad from Seeing a vision of one of us getting killed? How is that protecting people?"

Before Ran could respond, Yohji pushed past him until he was eye-to-eye with Aya-chan. "What do you know?" he asked softly. "When we go on a mission, what do you think? What do you desire?"

"That everyone comes home safe," she said after a moment.

"So there's no question, no doubt that you want to protect us," he continued. "It's evident in the way you constantly watch over us, that you constantly take care of us the way you do. So what do you know?"

"I know…" she began, brow furrowing for a moment. Her eyes widened suddenly. "I know that the first time Brad had a vision around me he practically went catatonic."

Yohji nodded slowly. "And that bothered you, didn't it?"

"It frightened me," she said. "He was one of the few people who came into contact with my brother after the accident. He was partially responsible for my awakening. I knew he had told me the truth when he said he regretted the circumstances surrounding my awakening. I know…the look in his eyes when he caught me, when he froze. It frightened me. I thought I was going to lose one of the few links I had to my brother, to the only family I still had. The look on his face made me think he was in pain. When I found out that he'd had a vision, I remember wondering if they always caused him pain the way that one seemed to."

"So you weren't focusing on Schatten," Brad interrupted softly. "You were focusing on me, on protecting me."

Aya-chan looked up at him, eyes tearing slightly. "We talked about my brother and then you asked me out so you could try and make up for him dying. And then you asked me out again. You told me about Weiss, about Schwarz, about your powers, about how you were trying to free yourselves. You told me everything. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," Brad replied, smiling slightly. "I'm actually rather flattered to know that you thought so much about me after just a month."

"You do know that this is fixable," Schuldig interrupted. Everyone turned to stare at the German. "You have two telepaths here and Esset's strongest kinetic. We can fix this no problem."

"Yeah," Nagi piped in. "It really shouldn't take that long either.

* * *

**Koneko, one week later, 8:30 am**

"So much for it not taking long," Yohji muttered.

Nagi glared. "Bite me."

"Sorry, you're under eighteen." He grinned when Nagi made a rude gesture. "Nagi, I'm shocked! I might have to tell Aya-chan and you know what that means – she'll be cleaning your hands with the nastiest bar of soap she can find." His smile faded slightly. "So, any idea why we haven't been able to make any progress with our little mother?"

"I dunno," Nagi said, shoulders slouching slightly. "Setting a shield up around her subconscious should have worked. I don't know why the shields keep disappearing."

"Perhaps another subconscious issue?" the blonde suggested.

"Could be."

"Great." Green eyes flicked towards the door of Brad's office. "Think they'll be able to fix this?"

"We'll see."

Inside the office, Ran and Schuldig sat on either side of Aya-chan. Brad was absent, storming Manx's office, as Schuldig had put it, to explain the appearance of three more Talents in Schatten, two of which they really couldn't identify.

Ran's eyes flicked towards the German telepath. _'Could we have a minute?'_ he asked silently.

Schuldig looked at him in surprise before rising to his feet. "I'm getting a beer," he announced as he strode towards the door.

Aya-chan watched him go and, after the door closed once more, turned to Ran. "I take it you wanted to talk in private?"

Ran looked slightly disgruntled. "At least we know now why Toma and I always had so much trouble pulling one over on you."

Aya-chan preened slightly.

Sighing softly, Ran looked her in the eye. "Can you drop your shields? We need to figure out just what's holding you back and if I can get in your head a bit, we'll have a better chance of figuring it out."

After a moment's hesitation, Ran could feel his adopted sister's complex mind open before him. "Ok," he began, "let's start with how you feel about Brad, about Schatten, the people who make it up."

Aya-chan nodded slightly, thinking furiously. "Brad," she began, "I love him. He trusted me from the beginning, with things that couldn't have been easy to talk about. He respected me for who I was, not because I was your little sister."

"What about Nagi?"

"Nagi's still young. Not much younger than me, I know, but he's never had a real family. Brad tried but he could only do so much without risking Esset catching on and separating them. Brad doesn't know it, but Nagi was always afraid that if he didn't measure up, then Brad would get rid of him, send him back to Rosenkreuz. He was only there for a few weeks after all and could see how bad it was. When Brad picked him for his new team, it was a Godsend. Even when he knew what Crawford wanted to do, that Crawford would free him, he was still afraid of losing him. He just wanted Brad's approval. In a way," she said slowly, "Brad is the closest thing Nagi's ever had to a father. And since he had seen so many families broken up, he was terrified that his would break."

She stopped suddenly, seeing something in Ran's face.

Ran looked at his sister, struggling to keep the sorrow and grief he felt from reaching her. The reason for her unconscious struggle had just come to light. She was like Nagi. She'd lost one family and was afraid that she'd lose another if they didn't like her or if she failed them. Waking up alone, learning that her brother had died (as they had thought at the time) minutes before she awoke, that while she slept he had begun to consider himself unclean, unworthy of basic human consideration. All this had terrified her, so she had clung desperately to the idea that if she made a new family, she would be safe again, whole She would have to make herself lovable, indispensable and unexpendable.

Reaching out, he gathered her into his lap, hugging her close. _'I'm not leaving,'_ he told her silently, _'not Brad, not Nagi, none of us.'_ He reached out once more, finding Schu's familiar mind. _'I found the problem,'_ he sent quietly. _'Now we just have to convince her subconscious that no matter what, she won't lose her new family.'_

'_Tall order,´_ Schu sent back. _'Any ideas? It's all about the phrasing, after all.'_

'_Ass. Get back here and help.'_

'_Yes, sir,'_ was the German's mocking reply.

"You know," he said walking back into the room, "if we, and I mean Weiss and Schwarz here, can survive fighting each other, being in a building in the middle of the ocean when it collapses while it's on fire, falling into the ocean, nearly drowning, your brother finding out that he's working with us now, finding out that you've been living with us, finding out he's a telepath, a teleporter and a gestalt-er….thingie…if we can survive your brother when he's got crap for mental shields, when he thinks Crawford's seduced you, when-"

"She gets the point," Ran said in a disgruntled voice. In his lap, Aya-chan was trying unsuccessfully to restrain a fit of giggles.

"The point is," Schuldig continued blandly, "if we can survive all the crap your brother has put us through, we're immortal." He grinned down at her. "Those two?" he asked, projecting the image of Nagi and Yohji sprawled out over the chairs outside. "They're fidgeting out there because they're worried about you. Nagi got a new computer game almost two weeks ago. He hasn't even started it yet. Kudoh? Usually asleep at this hour. But he's been up for a while so he could worry about you properly."

"This worry of yours," Ran continued, "is like kryptonite to us, to Brad. Who will probably kill us when he finds out we compared him to Superman and not one of the X-men…but still. If we can't box it in, it'll kill him."

'_Do you think this is working?'_ Ran sent worriedly?

'_You bet it is,'_ Schu responded. _'I'm reinforcing this as much as I dare. Trust me when I say that her subconscious is getting it. Let's give her time to mull things over and try the shields again in a few hours.'_

'_Sounds good,'_ Ran agreed in silent relief. He yelped when Aya-chan poked him in the ribs.

"I swear," she said with some exasperation, "you two are worse than you and Toma ever were and you and Toma were practically brothers!"

Ran gave the (amused) German an aggravated look. "We'll try the shields again in a few hours."

* * *

**Next morning**

'_Better check and see if the shields held,'_ Schuldig sent sleepily.

Ran snorted slightly at the German's laziness but quickly reached out for his sister's mind. _'Knock, knock,'_ he said softly. _'Let me check.'_

'_Of course,'_ she replied politely, dropping her shields as she did so.

After a moment's study, Ran could feel that the shields had held. The box within a box was in place. _'It held,'_ he told her in relief.

'_Good,'_ she replied. _'Now scootch so I can get a shower.'_

Making a face, Ran slipped out of her mind after a quick _'Love you'_ to Aya-chan. He glanced down at Schuldig and promptly pushed him from the bed. "They held," he said blandly. "Aya-chan's showering. She'll start breakfast as soon as she's done. Why don't you go set the table while I shower?"

"And why isn't it the other way around?" he demanded.

Ran gave him a superior look. "Because I said so, that's why. Now get down there before I take you down there." That said, he grabbed a fresh set of clothes from his dresser and disappeared into the bathroom.

Schuldig made a face at Ran's back. "I'm going to be so happy when I can move back into my own room," he muttered as he scrounged a clean shirt from the basket of folded clothes Aya-chan had delivered a few days earlier.

Breakfast found everyone gathered around the table, all pleased to hear that Aya-chan's powers were under control. Everyone, that is, except Brad.

Aya-chan's brow furrowed slightly every time her eyes fell on his empty chair. Finally, footsteps were heard on the stairs. Brad soon appeared, fresh from the shower and dressed for the day.

"You're late," Yohji said blandly. "I ate your muffin."

"Why were you late?" Farfarello demanded. "Aya-chan was worried."

Brad cleared his throat faintly. "Vision," he said shortly as he poured himself a cut of coffee.

"What about?" Omi asked carefully.

"Personal business."

Schuldig studied him before a smirk suddenly stretched across his face. "You sure were in the shower a long time."

Brad gave him a dark look. "Perhaps I should send **you** to the post office today," he threatened.

Yohji looked at the German. "You're dead," he said blandly. "Must have hit the nail on the head."

Brad threw his napkin down on the table and stomped into the kitchen.

Omi looked back and forth between Yohji and Schuldig. "What nail?" he asked in confusion.

* * *

_Many thanks to Wikipedia for providing the information on brainwaves. The labeling of different Talents with different wave patterns is not from any source other than our own minds._

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http:// silvenstarlight . livejournal . com/ . Please visit our website at (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	26. Loose Ends and New Beginnings

**Total Mayhem: Chapter Twenty-Five – Loose Ends and New Beginnings**

**_NOW OFFERING UPDATE NOTIFICATIONS! SEE LIVEJOURNAL FOR DETAILS. _**

_By Ptath and Lady Raina _

_Beta-ed by Thalia_

_A special thank you to our amazing, wonderful, happy, energetic, inspiring, beloved, dear dear muse Thalia. We could not do this without you. glomps Thalia_

_**Disclaimer**: We do not own Weiss. Even if we could, simple self-preservation would dictate we stay far, far away. _

'This' mean thinking to one's self ('Time to introduce myself')

'_This' means talking telepathically ('hello, my name is George,')_

"This" _means talking out loud _("I like cats.")

oo000oo000oo

**Koneko, October 15, 10 am**

Schuldig slowly descended the stairs and walked out onto the second floor. He wasn't completely sure why Brad wanted to see him, not when they were about to drive out to the Villa for the rehearsal dinner. 'It can't be something too bad,' he told himself. 'No last minute errands. Aya-chan wants us there early. No hitches. Errands in this family equal hitches.'

Finally reaching the office door, the German reached into the room carefully, trying to at least tell who was in the room. His nervousness increased tenfold when he felt Brad, Aya-chan, Ran and Yohji. They were all brimming with anticipation and barely contained glee.

'_Come in, Schuldig_,' Brad's voice suddenly said. _'This won't take long.'_

The door flew open. Yohji grinned at him and gestured for him to enter. "You wanted to see me?" the German asked carefully as he stepped into the room.

"Ah, yes, please come in," Brad repeated in a pleasant voice. Too pleasant.

Blue eyes darted around the room. Yohji was now leaning against the door. To prevent him from fleeing, perhaps? Brad was seated behind his desk. Like everyone else in the room, he was broadcasting a sense of gloating satisfaction. Aya-chan was perched on the corner of Brad's desk that was kept clear for tea trays. Ran had positioned himself in front of the window. He was holding a camera.

'He has a camera,' Schuldig realized. 'Mein Gott, what are they planning to do to me?'

"Now," Ran began in a merry voice. "I believe you will recall a small wager we made in front of the ruined Villa Weiss, correct?"

Crap. He'd lost. He'd hoped the other telepath had forgotten. He sighed silently. Yeah right.

"Now, under the terms of the bet," Ran continued blithely, "if Brad and Aya-chan didn't sleep together before the wedding, I would get to pick what you wore to the wedding. Which is tomorrow, I believe," he added glancing at Aya-chan for confirmation.

"Nii-san asked me to help him pick out your suit," Aya-chan continued. "And I in turn asked Brad and Yohji to help because of their tasteful and unique senses of fashion."

"It's changed a bit from its original conception," Brad added pleasantly. "I do hope you appreciate the lengths we went to to get it just right." With a sweeping gesture, he motioned for Yohji to unzip the garment bag hanging on the back of the door. Ran, who had moved next to the blonde, raised the camera.

It was pink.

And…

Brad smirked as Schuldig whimpered. After all these years, he had finally had the perfect opportunity to exact his revenge.

The German telepath could only stare in horror at his…wedding…suit. "It's…um," he sputtered, "it looks like a pirate rifled through a matador's closet and stole the scraps."

"It was extremely hard finding a tailor who had the vision to make a flamingo pink suit with lacy cuffs, a high neck, gold buttons and frills, long matador pants with golden frills and trim and a shirt trimmed in gold," Aya-chan said blandly.

Schuldig whimpered again. "Why," he choked out, "just…why?"

"I told you I'd get even," Ran said, studying the Polaroid as a hand ran through his black hair.

oo000oo000oo

**_Koneko, October 3, 6:30 pm_**

_Ran walked into the dining room, calmly ignoring the looks of shock and soft gasps that suddenly filled the room._

_Yohji looked at him carefully before speaking. "Trying something new?" he asked with artificial casualness._

_"It looks good," Nagi added quickly. _

_"You'll have to ask Schuldig," Ran replied blandly. "I was just as surprised as you were when I saw it."_

_Schuldig stared in horror as the swordsman approached to take his seat at the table. "You, uh, you used the wrong bottle," he said weakly. _

_"Really, now?" Ran asked._

_"Uh, yeah. Um, that bottle was, uh, well, Yohji's."_

_"I beg your pardon," the blonde demanded in outrage._

"_Well, do you remember when Ran, uh, Aya at that time, accidentally 'ported into your shower?"_

"_That was four months ago!" Yohji exclaimed, shuddering as he spoke. Having Aya appear in his shower had given him nightmares for almost two months straight._

"_Yeah, well, Ra-, I mean Aya mentioned something you were thinking and it was the kind of thing that requires revenge."_

"_What was I thinking," Yohji demanded._

"_I don't really want to know," Ken said in a slightly sick sounding voice. "Can we move on? Please?"_

"_So you waited four months to get revenge?" Aya-chan asked in surprise. Then she frowned slightly. "Why didn't I ever think of that…the anticipation alone is torture enough…"_

"_I still don't understand how this happened," Omi said in confusion._

"_Do I have to spell it out for you?" Schuldig finally exploded. "Fine! I grabbed one of Kudoh's shampoo bottles and put black hair dye in it. I didn't get a chance to return it to his bathroom and this dumm-kopf used that bottle when he took a shower."_

_Silence filled the room. Finally, Nagi spoke up. "So, is it permanent?"_

_Schuldig cringed. Heads began to nod. Yes, it was._

_Farfarello studied Ran for a moment. "You know," he finally said, "that makes you look twice as threatening."_

"_I hadn't realized that was possible," Aya-chan agreed._

_Ran shrugged slightly before giving his sister an apologetic look. "I'm afraid it's going to be like this in all the wedding pictures."_

_Schuldig sank even lower into his seat. The possibility of a Fujimiya temper tantrum had just increased exponentially. And if Aya-chan got angry, he'd have Farfarello and Brad to deal with immediately and the others over the next few days._

"_It'll have to do," she finally said. "It's not your fault, after all. It doesn't look bad and won't take too long to get used to."_

_Later that night, Schuldig gave Ran a nervous look. "You're not angry about your hair, are you?" he asked._

_Ran gave him a patient look. "Now, Schu," he said patiently, "why would I get angry when I can get even?"_

oo000oo000oo

**Koneko, 10:30 am**

Manx pulled her car into the garage where Brad's truck normally sat. Said truck was now in the alley, having been fully loaded with various supplies. Turning the car off, she climbed out and carefully took a long garment bag from the trunk. Heading over to the stairs, she climbed up to the second floor.

"Ah, good morning Ken, Farfarello," she said as she walked off the staircase. "Do you know where Aya-chan is?"

"I think she's upstairs," Ken said vaguely. "I know she was in Brad's office a while ago, but that's it."

"Ah," the red haired woman said, turning once more to climb one last flight of steps.

Reaching the top of the stairs, she ran into Sakura.

"Good morning, Manx!" the young girl said brightly. She glanced at the garment bag, eyes widening. "Ooo, is that the dress?" she squealed.

Manx laughed. "Yes, I picked it up earlier like Aya-chan asked. I was just going to make sure they got everything right."

"Aya-chan's in her room," Sakura said, leading Manx down the hallway.

As they got close, they could hear Ran's deep voice floating out of his sister's room.

"Find something amusing?" Manx asked as she strode into the room.

"Just Schu's reaction to his suit," Aya-chan said gleefully. "It was fantastic! He's eyes sorta bulged out and he kept trying to find something nice to say, to avoid hurting my feelings." She giggled softly. "He didn't do very well."

Ran smirked. "He has learned not to bet against a Fujimiya," he gloated.

Manx laughed and held up the garment bag. "Take a look, Aya-chan," she said. "If they messed up, we need to know before we leave Tokyo."

"Of course," Aya-chan replied, reaching over to unzip the bag. Before it was completely undone, however, her face paled. "Oh dear."

Ran's head whipped around, noticeable alarm on his face. "Oh dear?" he repeated.

"Yes, oh dear," Aya-chan said, a look of anger growing on her face. "It's the wrong dress!"

"Oh dear, indeed," Sakura said with wide eyes. "I think this fully qualifies as a copy-righted 'Aya-chan oh dear' moment."

"It's the wrong one!" Aya-chan said again, rage filling her eyes. "How could they mess it up? It's not that hard!"

Ran reached over and rested a hand on her shoulder. "Do you have a receipt or dress number or something?" he asked carefully.

"Of course I do!" she snapped back.

"Then give it to me. Manx and I will go and get the correct dress and meet everyone at the Villa."

oo000oo000oo

Ran gave the frightened clerk a dark glare. "What do you mean you got the dresses switched?" he demanded.

Manx reached over and put a restraining hand on his arm. "It's a simple mistake," she said soothingly. "One that won't take too much to fix." She looked at the clerk. "You said that the person whose dress we have has ours?" she asked.

"Ye-yes," the clerk stuttered.

"Give me the name," Ran demanded.

"I'm not, um, not supposed to…"

Ran's eyes began to blaze. Manx gave him an exasperated look and shoved him to one side.

"Madam," she began politely. "We need this dress now. I'm certain that the poor woman whose dress we have is equally worried. If you could give us her name and any information you have, we'll make certain that the dresses get returned to their proper owners."

The clerk hesitated, her eyes flickering from Manx, to Ran and to the dress.

"Or," Manx continued, "I could walk out of the store to make a few calls leaving my dear friend's brother to sort out the issue of his little sister's wedding dress."

The clerk didn't hesitate. She dove for the computer and began typing frantically.

oo000oo000oo

Nagi closed his cell phone, shaking his head in amusement. Judging by the peevish tone of Ran's voice, the clerk at the dress store had given them a hard time about giving them the name of the woman who had Aya-chan's dress.

He finished shutting his laptop down and cast a look around the computer room. Satisfied that everything was in place and properly shut-down (save for the security system which would reduce any would-be thief to a vegetable state by the time anyone returned to the Koneko), he grabbed his bag and ran out to Schuldig's Mustang Saleen

Special.

"Everything work out ok," Ken asked worriedly.

"Yeah," Nagi replied. "Ran and Manx are headed to the church where the other woman is. She's getting married today."

"Good thing they called then," Farfarello said absently. "Aya-chan would hate for someone else to try and wear _her_ wedding dress before she can."

Ken glanced at the Irish man, the mention of a church sparking a memory several months old.

oo000oo000oo

_**Koneko, April, set during Chapter 7 – Comments from the Peanut Gallery**_

"_Why do you blame God?" Ken asked carefully._

_Farfarello looked at him in surprise. "Why shouldn't I?"_

_Ken frowned. "Why did you kill your mother?"_

_Far looked out the window. "I was trying to kill you," he said after a moment. "She got in the way, remember?" He gave Ken a pointed look. _

_Ken looked at his hands, guilt welling up inside him._

"_God called her."_

"_What?"_

_Farfarello leveled his one-eyed stare on the former goalie. "It was her time. Who am I to argue with God?"_

"_I thought you hated God."_

"_I do. But I don't deny His power. Or His right to call His children home."_

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, 12:30 pm**

Manx's face was white as she staggered out of Ran's car. Hearing his door slam shut, she wheeled around and gave him a vicious glare. "I am **never** riding with you again," she hissed.

Ran stared at her in confusion. "Why does everyone say that?" he asked wonderingly. "We got here in one piece, didn't we?"

"Physically, yes, mentally, I'm not so sure!"

Ran frowned at the normally calm and collected Kritiker agent. She'd become much more emotional since Weiss's return, he'd noticed. Perhaps she needed a vacation. Shaking his head slightly, he carefully picked up his sister's dress and handed it to Manx. She gave him another dark look before stalking into the house.

"Terrified another innocent bystander, did we?" a dry voice suddenly broke in.

Ran wheeled around. Standing next to a large van was Yuushi of Crashers. The telepath scowled. "What are you doing here," he demanded.

"Providing the catering," Knight replied blandly. "Kritiker decided that a normal catering company didn't deserve to be subjected to you and your whacked out team. And since we've already been exposed, we got enlisted to transport the food."

"Oh really," Ran said, already warming up for a rousing argument. The bright look in Yuushi's eyes told him that the other agent felt the same. "Well, I suppose menial work is best done by menial minds."

"Why you vulgar bastard!"

"Can't you come up with anything new?" Ran asked with an arched brow. "How long have you been calling me that now? Two years? Three?"

Yuushi gave him a smarmy smirk. "Why, Ran, I told you you would learn to count without using your fingers! Well done!"

"At least I can count," Ran retorted. "By the way, have you finally gotten your ABC's down?"

"Yes and my alphabet includes I. Q."

"I didn't think that was possible for a natural blonde."

"What do you two think you're doing?" screeched a female voice. Ran and Yuushi started violently before turning to give Aya-chan a sheepish look. She looked from one to the other furiously. "Do you realize how much work needs to be done? Do you realize how little time we have to do it?"

"We were just-," Ran began.

"Dawdling! Indulging your childish minds with childish insults! Now get in here and get to work!"

The former teammates gave each other wide-eyed looks and scurried into the house.

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, second story, 12:45 pm**

"The new Villa's nice," Yohji said admiringly.

"You've said that three times already," Ken complained. "Can you at least find something new to say?"

Yohji gave Ken a dismissive look. "You're just irked that you have to share a room with Farfarello.

"No, you're just irked you have the tiniest room in the house," Ken retorted.

"Yes, but it's all mine."

Nagi shook his head as the two assassins continued to bicker. He looked back at the pool table. The balls were idly arranging themselves into different patterns.

Yuushi suddenly appeared on the stairs, moving fast. He looked at the assembled men and jerked his head towards the first floor. "The women have gone insane," he said nervously.

'_You were expecting something different?' _ Schuldig asked silently, reveling in the startled and frightened look that crossed the blonde's face.

'_Stop that,'_ Ran sent with a frown as he walked up behind Yuushi. The German merely stuck his tongue out and turned back to the television.

Yuushi looked at the new pool table, the moving balls and then at Ran. "No way," he said before the younger man could speak. "Get another victim, I've learned my lesson about taking you on."

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, second floor, 2:45 pm**

Naru gave Omi an admiring look. The pyro-obsessed boy had appeared when the food for the wedding reception had all been put away. "You did real well, Omi," he said brightly.

"First person I've ever seen kick Ran's butt," Masato added from his chair near the TV. "And considering the number of bars we dragged him into, not to mention his current display of prowess in defeating all of Schatten…"

Ran gave him an irked look then looked back at the pool table. He grudgingly gave Omi a nod of acknowledgement. "I'll have to remember not to go easy on you."

"Don't lie," Yuushi called out. "He won and there was nothing you could have done to stop it."

"Don't worry, Ran," Schuldig said in mock consolation, "we'll remember your years of triumph. Just think of this as a passing of the crown to the next generation."

Ran glanced at the German. "You just keep digging," he said flatly. "I think you've finally hit bottom and are ready to start climbing out and then you whip out a new shovel."

"It's a Talent."

Omi gave Ran a wide grin. He made no effort to soothe the other's feelings nor did he fake modesty. It was good to have finally come into his own.

oo000oo000oo

**_Koneko, late June, between chapters 19 and 20_**

_Aya glanced up from his book when he heard footsteps on the stairs. He peered over the half-wall that divided the dining and sitting room, relaxing when he saw Omi. The young hacker walked past him, obviously heading for the computer room._

_He looked down at his book for a moment then back up. "How was school," he asked casually._

_Omi shot him a nasty look. "What do you care," the normally cheerful blonde spat. Ignoring Aya's shocked look, he continued into the computer room, sliding the door shut with a hard jerk. _

_Aya sat frozen for a moment before carefully setting his book down and following the hacker into the lab._

"_Is there a problem," he asked coolly as he walked up behind the other._

_Omi's lips pressed into a thin line. "Everything's fine. Why do you ask," he answered snarkily. _

"_This isn't like you," Aya responded._

"_Oh, that's right," Omi snapped. "God forbid perky, happy Omi not be perky and happy." He shot the red-head a dark glare. "I'm surprised you even noticed."_

_Aya raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "It'd be hard not to," he replied. _

"_Oh, really? And here I thought nothing else mattered to you except your precious sister and all our new friends."_

_Aya pressed his lips together and popped Omi on the back of the head in silent rebuke. His eyes went wide when Omi snarled, lunging out of his chair and took a swing at him. He seized the blonde's fist with one hand and shoved him up against a wall with the other until they were eye to eye._

"_What is your problem," Aya snapped. "Tell me before I have to go digging for it!"_

_Omi kicked at him, his blue eyes filled with anger. "You would, wouldn't you," he snapped. _

"_What?" Aya asked, shaking his head in disbelief._

"_We used to be friends, remember?" Omi stated coolly. "You used to trust me. We used to do things together. Now all you care about is your sister and Schwarz. You don't have time for anything, any**one** else!"_

_Aya's hands went slack and the blonde fell to the floor. Before he could get away, however, Aya trapped him against the wall, an arm on either side of the hacker. "Is that what this is about?" he demanded incredulously. "You decide to start acting like a Class-A brat because you think you're being ignored?"_

_Omi's face went pale. His eyes widened, a vulnerable look crossing his face. "No," he said softly, "it's because I miss my friend."_

_Aya's head bowed slightly, his voice soft as he spoke. "We're still friends," he said. "There were other concerns, however, concerns that needed to be dealt with." He glanced up, looking Omi in the eye once more. "Our family has grown," he continued. "And considering who it now encompasses, I knew we'd need to work harder to make this work. I also knew that you could handle the rest of Weiss while I dealt with Schwarz. I knew that between the two of us, we could make this work."_

_Omi's eyes had gone wide. Aya straightened, freeing the blonde. "Ken and Yohji are too hard-headed, too stubborn to have just accepted Schwarz. Schuldig wouldn't have been able to resist poking at them. Farfarello would have followed Schuldig. But because Aya-chan and Brad are such good friends, the fact that you and Nagi are such good friends made it harder for everyone to fight. No one wanted to upset you." Aya turned, facing the door. "I suppose that, since I was gone for so long, it was really you and Aya-chan who made this work."_

_Omi bit his lip, gnawing on it for a moment. "Aya?" he said softly. "I'm sorry. The things I said…"_

_Aya shook his head as he walked to the door. "Don't worry about it." He glanced at the blonde and slid the door open. "Maybe we can go catch a movie or something later."_

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, garden, 7 pm**

Farfarello gave Ken an incredulous look. "This is the priest you found?" he demanded. "This one? Do you remember who he is?"

Ken looked at him in confusion. "Yeah, he works at a church we make deliveries to a lot. He's a really nice guy."

"No he isn't," the madman hissed, "he's the one who brought _You-Know-Who_ to us!"

Ken blinked in confusion. "Far, we're not in England," he stuttered.

Farfarello pressed his lips together as he watched the kindly-looking priest talk pleasantly with Ran. "Murphy," he finally hissed. "He brought Murphy!"

Ken's eyes went wide. "Well, maybe, uh, he'll take Murphy back with him?"

"Farfarello, Ken," Brad's voice suddenly snapped. "What do you think you're doing?"

Farfarello gave his leader a solemn look. "This priest must leave. He is the one who brought Murphy to Ken."

Brad stared at him, stunned speechless. His hands opened and closed for a moment before he suddenly shook his head. "You two are guests, so go sit down!" he finally barked.

Farfarello gave him a _look_ before speaking, "But there aren't any chairs."

Brad leveled a glare at the madman. "I don't care," he growled.

The priest cleared his throat as he moved under the arch. "If we could get started," he said in a kind voice. Everyone moved into place. Those not involved in the wedding settled down to watch the proceedings. The run-through went surprisingly smoothly considering who was involved. Nagi and Omi could be heard whispering to each other as they checked camera angles on their computers from the balcony. The priest walked them through the ceremony, somehow managing to miss the floating digital cameras and camcorders recording the event. He also managed to miss the rings floating down when it came time for them to be used.

Finally, the run-through came to an end. Ken hustled the priest out the door as politely as possible with an offer to drive him back to his nearby hotel to rest up for the big day. As everyone else assembled in the living room, Crashers finished laying out dinner on the buffet table set up against the window facing the garden.

"Well," Aya-chan said brightly, "I think that went very well!" She beamed out at the assembled Kritiker teams.

After getting through dinner and the necessary speeches, Manx stood up and cleared her throat. "At the risk of being completely off-topic," she began, "I have a notice from Kritiker about the status of Schatten."

Silence fell over the room as twenty-seven eyes fell on her. "As of this moment, Schatten has two new members."

"What?"

"Who?"

"What poor bastards are you handing over to these people?"

"I beg your pardon…"

Manx cleared her throat again, her eyes glowing as she beheld the chaos before her. She'd finally have her revenge. "Your two members only recently joined Kritiker so you will need to ensure that they have the necessary training to fully participate in missions as you deem fit."

"We have to train them?"

"Can't we just send them to one of the training centers?"

"Are you insane?"

"Why do we need two new members anyway?"

Manx raised a hand, signaling for silence. "These members are not typical agents, nor does their functionality lend to their placement on an assassin team."

Silence filled the room. Ken finally asked a hesitant question.

"What?"

"Due to their qualifications," Far explained blandly, "it is a rare occurrence that Kritiker would place these agents on a lethal team. However, due to the unique circumstances which surround Schatten, they have realized that their presence is an indubitable necessity."

"Good grief," Yohji muttered rubbing his face with his hand. "Ken, we're so weird that we need these agents to continue to function."

Farfarello looked hurt. "That's what I said," he protested.

"No it wasn't," Omi scolded. "Your explanation was unnecessarily convoluted and multi-syllabic."

"As I was saying," interrupted Manx as she gave the assassins a narrow look, "while these members are new to Schatten, you might be interested to know that they were integral to the fall of the Elders of Esset."

Brad gave her a careful look. "I'm not sure that's possible," he said slowly, "the building collapsed. Everyone died except for Weiss and Schwarz."

"What?" Aya-chan exclaimed as she swatted his arm. "What am I, chopped liver? And what about poor Saku…" Her voice trailed off, eyes going wide.

"You're putting girls on a lethal team?" Naru asked curiously. "You're going to issue them each a license to kill?"

Masato edged towards the door. "Don't they get that at birth?"

"You're putting my little sister on a lethal team?" Ran growled, eyes flashing ominously beneath black brows. "You are putting my **baby sister** on a **lethal team**?"

"I wasn't aware that Kritiker was so casual about breaking contracts," Brad added in a chilly voice. "Aya-chan joined Kritiker on a medical basis only."

"Sakura isn't even part of Kritiker," Nagi snapped in a mini-Ran rage. The dishes on the table began to rattle.

"And you're planning on making her kill?" Omi added incredulously.

"She didn't say that," Sakura said tightly. "She said that Schatten would define our function in the team." She gave them a narrow look. "You think I can't handle being a part of this **officially**?"

Schuldig snorted. "Ignore them," he said dryly. "Once the testosterone levels go back down they'll be fine."

Aya-chan gave her brother and fiancé a wide watery eyed look. "You don't want us on your team?" she asked in a soft, miserable voice. "I, I suppose that you would know best….I mean, if you think I'm not good enough, you can just say so."

Ran gave her a pained look. "I almost lost you before," he said softly. "I can't risk losing you again. I couldn't handle that."

Aya-chan bit her lip as she gazed at her brother's face, the echoes of sorrow and old pain filling his voice.

oo000oo000oo

_**Koneko, early April, during Chapter 5, Weiss's first night in the Koneko**_

_Aya-chan gnawed on her lip as she gave her brother a discreet look. They'd been in the kitchen for fifteen minutes and he had yet to say a word. Her attempts at conversation, small talk and short grunts had been met with silence. _

_Aya focused on the vegetables he was slicing, his sister's gaze burning into his back. Once he had completed his work, he picked up the cutting board and dumped the slices into a bowl. _

"_I'm glad you're ok," he said suddenly, his deep voice filling the room._

_Aya-chan bit her lip before answering. "Sakura and Manx and Schwarz have all taken care of me," she said carefully. "Just the way you would have."_

_Aya's hands stilled as the cutting board came to rest on the counter. "You deserve better than what I can give you." He was silent a moment. "I'm not the person you think I am, the person you remember." He gave her a piercing look. "I can't be, not anymore. I did what I had to to take care of you, to get revenge. I'm still doing what I have to. There's nothing else I can do. You probably shouldn't get attached. You would probably be better off if I weren't here at all. I'm not worth loving, not anymore."_

_Aya-chan's back went stiff. Her eyes first widened, then narrowed. "It would take a hell of a lot more than killing the pond scum of the world to make you unworthy of love. And before you try and tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about, may I remind you that I have been keeping house for Schwarz, Kritiker's newest assassin team, for almost eight months? Not to mention what Manx and Sakura told me."_

_Aya's head whipped around in surprise._

_She gave him a grim smile. "Don't forget," she continued, her voice lightening slightly, "I'm used to having to pry information out of you and Toma. After that, Manx and Sakura were simple." Her head tilted to one side. "I love you no matter what you do. Sakura didn't turn her back on you once she found out what you were doing, did she? What makes you think I would?"_

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, kitchen, 9:27 pm**

"Well, that was educational," Yuushi said dryly.

Masato snorted as he hefted a large pile of dishes onto the countertop. "Never thought I'd get to see a Fujimiya Guilt Trip Death Match."

"I understand why he cared so much, now," Naru said as he continued to wash dishes.

Reiichi nodded as he sipped his coffee. "That was extremely intense…and dramatic."

"Not to mention educational," Yuushi replied. "Now we have proof that that family really does take everything to its extreme."

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, Second Floor 11:50 pm**

Schuldig glanced away from the television as a flicker of movement caught his eye. Sakura had slipped out of Aya-chan's room and onto the balcony. He gnawed on his lip for a moment, debating with himself silently. Finally, he sighed and flicked off the TV.

"Pretty cool out," he said as he opened the door to the balcony.

Sakura jumped slightly, her mind flickering back to the night Schuldig had approached her on the bridge.

"I guess it is," she said after a moment.

The German looked at her, his head cocked to one side.

"Something's bothering you," he stated. "You were awful tense at the rehearsal."

Sakura gave him a startled look. "I didn't want to mess up," she claimed. "This is very important to Aya-chan."

"Maybe that was part of it," Schuldig replied calmly as he leaned against the door. "But that's not all." He waited for a moment to see if she would reply. When she remained silent, he continued. "I'd like to help if I can," he offered.

"There's nothing wrong," Sakura lied. "I'm just really tired and stressed. As nice as it is to plan a wedding, it'll be nice when it's over."

Schuldig looked at her, finally nodding. "All right," he said. "I'll see you tomorrow. Night." Turning, he left the balcony and headed for his room. Whatever the problem was, now was not the time to push.

Sakura peered after him, sighing in silent relief. She was extremely glad he'd believed her.

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, Second Floor, 6 am**

Farfarello dodged frantically to one side as a large, heavy book flew towards his head.

"Damn it, Schuldig," he snapped irritably. "You don't have to be so mean!"

"Indeed," Ran said dryly as he rolled off the bed and headed for the dresser. "That's my job."

"Hmph," was all the German said.

Far shook his head, sighing softly as he turned towards Brad's room.

"Wakey, wakey, oh sacrificial lamb," he called as he pounded on his leader's door. "The sun will be shining soon, the birds have just begun to sing and Aya-chan's tying the noose tonight!" The Irish man blinked for a moment, suddenly clearing his throat. "I meant knot," he said sheepishly. "She's tying the knot tonight."

"Walk away now or I'll bless your knives with holy water."

Far ignored the threat, boldly swinging the door open and striding in. He flung open the blinds and turned to grin at his leader.

Grumpy eyes glared at him from under the pillow. "Farfarello," Brad growled, "you know I never forget. And you know I don't make empty threats. So what makes you think that this is a good idea?"

Far's grin widened. "This is where you are mistaken, oh great leader, you assume that I think." Brad snarled, whipping his gun out from under his pillow. Far continued to ignore him, padding over to the dresser. "You obviously don't want to wear your suit all day," he said blandly. "Oracle, you are not going to shoot me. It's your wedding day and shooting me would delay the wedding. That would make Aya-chan mad. I don't want to make her mad. And being shot would make her sad as well. I definitely don't want her to be sad, do you? Now, get up!"

oo000oo000oo

**6:08 am**

Ken sighed softly. Waking Omi and Nagi (at Farfarello's insistence) had been easy. Now it was time to wake up Yohji. He glanced at the two hackers and raised an eyebrow.

"Don't look at me," Omi said grumpily. "I don't want to be up right now."

Shaking his head, Ken gave him a scolding look. "If you went to bed before four in the morning, you wouldn't be dragging right now."

"Daylight is evil," Nagi muttered. "The time of the daystar is the worst time of all. The Sun is the greatest of my enemies, or at least, the most persistent."

Omi nodded.

Ken's head hit Yohji's door with a loud thunk. "I don't care anymore," he muttered, "I just don't. What's Far going to do to me? I mean, I have Murphy haunting my every step. What more could he do?"

Omi groaned and pushed past him. "If we have to be up, so does Yohji." He grabbed the knob and pushed the door open. "Yotan!" he bellowed. "Up, now!"

The blonde continued to lie sprawled out on his bed, one arm dangling off the edge. Omi hissed in annoyance and glanced at Nagi. The hacker nodded.

Yohji twitched slightly as a cool breeze wafted over him. He groaned, pulling the comforter closer as he sat up slightly. He blinked in confusion as he saw Ken, Omi and Nagi standing in his window, waving at him with cheerful grins on their faces. Suddenly, the bed was not under him anymore. A high pitched scream shattered the early morning silence. Yohji clutched desperately at his blanket as he found himself staring at the cold earth.

"All right," he bellowed as he struggled to get his heart rate under control. "Put me down!"

"Ok!" Nagi called out.

Yohji screamed again. "In the house! In!"

oo000oo000oo

**9 am**

Everyone froze as the doorbell suddenly rang. Ran looked in its direction sharply, a number of thoughts running through his head simultaneously.

First, no one knew they were at the Villa except Kritiker.

Second, no one in Kritiker would ring the doorbell. All Kritiker agents took great pleasure in sneaking into a house of assassins and surprising them (oddly enough).

Thirdly, it was Aya-chan's wedding day.

Fourth, it could be a trap.

Fifth, they were in a secluded mountain villa miles away from anyone else.

The doorbell rang again. Ran's eyes narrowed and he opened his mind. _'Yuushi, meet me at the front door.'_

'_Why am I going to the potential frontline?' _the blonde whined.

'_Shut up'_ Ran snapped. _'The rest of Crashers, cover the garden. Brad, Aya-chan, stay upstairs. Far-'_

'_Don't even think about making me move,'_ the Irish man snapped. _'There's no way I'm leaving Aya-chan alone.'_

'_That's exactly what I wanted to hear. Now, Yohji, get to the balcony. Omi, top of the stairs with Ken. Nagi, take the front windows above the front door._

'_Uh, Ran?'_ Schuldig interrupted, _'you do know that we can just check this person out in about two seconds…'_

'_That's two seconds a Rosenkreuz agent could use to kill us all. Now scan for any minds in the area.'_

Aya-chan sighed softly as her brother snapped orders right and left. "Bless his paranoid little mind," she said in a fond voice. "He's going to feel so foolish when this turns out to be nothing."

Sakura and Manx hit the floor laughing.

'_There's one guy at the door,'_ Schuldig began.

'_That all I needed to know,'_ Ran replied.

'_But Ran!'_

'_Schu, I don't have time for this! I'm opening the door!'_

'_But I really think that you should know-'_

"Good morning, sir! Special delivery! Please sign here,' beamed the uniformed delivery man.

Ran blinked owlishly and automatically took the clipboard, signed his name and took possession of the box. Delivery successful, the man dashed back to his truck and drove back down off the mountain. Ran stared after him for a moment before looking down at the package in his hands.

'_Schu, why didn't you warn me,'_ he growled silently.

'_I tried!'_

'_Not hard enough! I know how pushy you can be!'_

'_Oh, really,'_ Aya-chan sent in a peevish tone. _'You did this to yourself. Now open the box!'_

'_Would you like me to bring it up on a silver platter first?'_

'_Don't get snarky with me!'_

'_Can we go back to what we were doing?' _ Nagi asked curiously.

'_You don't want to see what Ran got us all worked up for?' _ Schuldig asked in mock surprise. _'After all, it could turn out to be a bomb or a canister of nerve gas or a severed body part! Mob style! Nice and bloody at the end.'_

'_Eww,' _Sakura groaned. _'I just ate!'_

'_That's it!' _ Brad finally exploded. _'Bring that upstairs so we can open it!'_

'_No!'_ screamed Farfarello in horror. _'You can't see Aya-chan on your wedding day!'_

'_Fine, ladies first,' _Crawford snapped.

'_Oh, so if it is a bomb, you're going to let us go out first, is that it?'_

'_Aya-chan, just…' _ Brad sputtered for a moment. _'Executive decision! Everyone shut up!'_

'_Did you just tell me to shut up?' _Aya-chan asked with mock incredulity.

Ran idly set the box down on the pool table behind the TV and watched everyone stare into space as they continued to bicker. He shrugged to himself before pulling a knife out of his pocket and cut open the box.

"Wow," Ran muttered as he pulled the object out of the box. "That's…interesting." He continued to study it. "Actually, it's kinda cool."

Ken and Omi jerked slightly at the sound of Ran's voice. They turned in surprise, silently wondering how he had gotten past them without their noticing him. Then again, it was Ran.

Yohji sighed, lighting a cigarette and pulled the door to the balcony open, strolling inside. "So, fearless leader, what causes you to go from paranoid spastic to 'Oh, that's cool'?"

"Hey, I thought I was in charge here," Brad called irritably from his room.

"Insecure much?" Yohji called back.

Brad growled and pounded on the door. "Farfarello, Schuldig, I demand you let me out this instant!"

"Sorry, boss man," Schuldig replied, "Far's paranoid superstition forbids it."

"We must be sensitive to such things after all," Yohji agreed. "Far's a person, too."

"Damn straight I am."

"Why," Brad groaned softly as he banged his head against the wall. "Why must there be two of them?"

oo000oo000oo

**_Koneko, night after Chapter Eight: March of the Fangirls, 9:30 pm_**

_Schuldig stuck his hands in his pockets as he slowly walked to Yohji's room. Poking his head in, he found the blonde sprawled out on his bed, book in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. _

"_You're going out tonight, right?" the German asked hopefully. Yohji looked at him in surprise._

"_Well, naturally," he replied. "This house is getting a bit odd. I need time away."_

"_Mind if I come with you?"_

"_What?" Yohji asked in surprise. "What about Aya?"_

"_Brad can cover him for a few hours. He gave me the night off."_

_Yohji's brow furrowed. "Brad's not a telepath," he stated slowly._

"_Yeah, well," Schuldig began, "he's got these really strong shields, plus experience in covering a telepath for a while. Aya will be fine."_

_The blonde nodded knowingly. "He shielded you, didn't he?"_

_The German's mouth twisted. "Yeah. Let's just say that when Schwarz was formed I wasn't in the best shape."_

_Yohji gave him a level look before shrugging. "That's cool. So, club?"_

oo000oo000oo

Everyone (minus Brad) gathered around the pool table staring at the object Ran had pulled from the box.

"Is there a note?" Aya-chan and Sakura asked in unison. They both blinked, looked at each other and giggled. "Seriously, though," Aya-chan said between giggles. "It must be a wedding present. There has to be a note."

Ran gave them a cool look and picked up the box. He turned it upside down, clear bubble-wrap falling to the table top. He then pointed the open end towards them so that they could see the lack of a note for themselves.

Aya-chan frowned and gave her brother a sharp look. "I know you can talk," she said sternly. "I've heard you do it. Ever since you found out you're a telepath everything has to be all _fancy_. Why can't you just talk like a normal person for once in your life?"

Ran looked at her, the cool look turning bland. He then stuck his tongue out at her. Her eyes went wide. "Mine's longer," she said mildly before sticking her own tongue at him.

Yohji nodded to himself and took a deep drag on his cigarette. Turning, he began to walk downstairs.

"Yotan," Omi called in surprise. "Where are you going?"

"To see if the booze is out yet."

Schuldig knocked on Brad's door. "Is there room for someone else in there?" he begged.

Nagi gave Ken a confused look. "What's wrong with them?"

Ken looked at him helplessly and shrugged. "Seems fine to me. I mean, if they're fine with it, who am I to judge?" he looked at the object on the table, frowning suddenly as he leaned forward. "Is that fire?" he asked in confusion as he carefully picked it up.

Nagi leaned over. "Can't be, there's nothing to burn in there," he replied in puzzlement.

"He's right!" Omi said leaning in on the other side.

Ran's head was slowly starting to angle to one side. He chewed on his lip for a moment before turning to Aya-chan. "Aya," he said in an odd voice, "I need Brad out here, can you go back to your room? Please?"

"What?" she asked, startled.

"Just…please," he repeated. He glanced towards Brad's door. "Brad, can you come out please?" He turned towards the stairs. "Yohji," he bellowed, "get up here, now!"

By now, everyone in Schatten was staring at the telepath in confusion and mild alarm. Brad's door slammed open and the precog stalked out. Ran pointed at the gift Ken still held. Yohji trudged up the stairs, an unopened bottle of beer in one hand and an accusing look on his face. He followed Ran's hand towards the gift. And blinked.

"I have one word for you," Ran said slowly. "Kryptonite."

Yohji took a closer look. "The Fortress of Solitude," he murmured in surprise. "The base is an exact replica of the Fortress of Solitude."

"The fire is red and blue," Brad continued, startled. "Superman's colors. The orb is filled with red and blue fire."

"Blue fire?" Nagi repeated. "Like your cousin Toma's blue fire?"

Omi was shaking his head as he looked at the orb. "It's backwards," he muttered. "The blue should be in the center, surrounded by the red. The red is surrounding the blue. That's not physically possible."

Ken looked down at the gift. The base was made up of green jade sculpted into individual crystals that made up the Fortress of Solitude. There was a clear orb resting in the Fortress, filled with red fire surrounded by blue fire. He bit his lip for a moment and carefully set it down on the table and took a few steps back.

"I'm going to stand back here," he muttered nervously.

"I think it's for the best," Farfarello replied absently.

Ran looked at the gift suppressing a sigh. He reached out to his sister. _'Aya,'_ he sent silently. _'Aya, I think this is from Toma.'_

'_I think you're right,'_ she replied as she studied the image of the gift he had sent her. _'Looks like he figured out how to do blue fire after all. Think it will go out in thirty nights like the legends?'_

'_I doubt it,' _he replied. _'Knowing him, he'll have found some way to keep it going. The red fire, perhaps.'_

Farfarello gave himself a slight shake. "What are we doing?" he demanded suddenly. "We have a wedding to get through and we can't do that if we're lollygagging around here! Let's move, people! Stare at the shiny, physically impossible object on your own time!"

oo000oo000oo

**Villa garden, 5:50 pm**

Nagi continued to fiddle with his laptop and, by extension, the cameras it controlled. Ken was "entertaining" the priest with stories about his kiddie soccer team while Farfarello lurked in the background, determined to protect Ken from further harm.

Omi slipped out of the house and ducked out of the way, taking a deep breath. "Thank goodness we only have an hour left," he groaned. "Everyone's gone insane."

"Talking about me?" Far asked suddenly.

Omi jumped into the air with a loud yelp, his hand going over his heart. Turning, he gave the Irish man an exasperated look. "Can't you make a little noise?" he begged. "If you keep this up, I swear, I'll staple a bell to your head."

Far grinned. "I take it everything's going well?"

"If you can call controlled chaos well," Omi replied dryly.

"It's Schatten's specialty."

The blonde laughed. "True," he said in amusement. "Ran and Yohji are putting the final touches on Aya-chan's bouquet and Schuldig is keeping Brad from jumping out of a window."

"Pity," Far muttered. "That would be extremely entertaining. How often does one get the chance to see Oracle overwhelmed by nerves?"

"Yes, well, Aya-chan gave Schu specific instructions," Omi said dryly. "She wants her fiancé unharmed during the ceremony."

"Scared sheep are easier to manage," the Irish man agreed.

Omi snickered. "Thanks," he said between chuckles. "I needed a breather."

"Eh," the other replied, "that's what friends are for."

oo000oo000oo

_**Koneko, May, 12:47 am, set during Chapter Thirteen - Painting the Town Red**_

_Omi gave the computer room one last look before walking out. Before he could get far, however, he saw Farfarello in a chair in the sitting room, book in hand. He bit his lip for a moment before screwing up his courage and walking over._

"_Why did you kill her?" he asked softly._

_The Irish man blinked in surprise. "What?"_

"_Ouka," Omi repeated. "Why did you kill her?"_

_Farfarello frowned slightly, carefully setting the book down on the coffee table. "That," he began hesitantly, "it, well, it wasn't me."_

"_I don't understand," the hacker said in confusion, "how could it not have been you? I saw you."_

_Far looked away for a moment. "When you go out," he started, "you don't go and kill as Tsukiyono Omi. You go out as Bombay. It's kinda like that."_

"_How so?" Omi asked._

"_When Aya goes out, when Brad goes out, when Yohji or Schu go out on a mission, they take on a different mindset, they become Abyssinian, Oracle, Balinese or Mastermind. But that mindset, that part of them, is always balanced by the essence of Aya, Brad, of Yohji or Schu. That other part allows them to exert control over Abyssinian and Oracle. I-" _

_Farfarello stopped for a moment, swallowing before continuing. "I can't do that. At least, not as well. Because of what happened while at Rosenkreuz, all the experiments, it's harder to balance myself, to keep Berserker in check. Being with all of you, though," he continued, "it helps. It's getting easier. But I still can't…"_

_Omi stood there, listening as Far's voice trailed off. The gaze from his single eye was distant, sad, vulnerable. He'd seen what happened when someone in Weiss lost control, lost that balance. He'd nearly lost it before. To know that it was beyond you, though, to know that you would never be able to fully control that…he suppressed a shiver. To be able to admit it was astounding._

"_I need you, everyone, to help me," Farfarello continued in a soft voice. "I don't like being like this but…I can't fix this on my own. I need everyone's help. I want to get better. I want...I need...I'm sorry I hurt you," he finished lamely._

_Omi nodded, a sad smile crossing his face. "I understand," he said softly. Daringly, he reached out and grasped the other's shoulder. "Just tell me what to do. Friends help each other, after all."_

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, garden, 7 pm**

The garden was lit by a few remaining wisps of daylight and countless candles scattered throughout the area. Birman stepped into place at the end of the loose arc formed by Schatten and Crashers. Yuushi nudged Yohji and nodded towards Brad.

"Your fearless leader looks ready to faint," he muttered. Yohji grinned.

"The ceremony's for the bride," Yohji muttered back. "The groom is inconsequential at this point. And besides, we never said he was fearless."

Manx hissed at them both, a fierce look on her face. Yohji's face paled. Yuushi merely rolled his eyes.

"Down kitty," he muttered teasingly. "You don't want to disturb the ceremony, do you?"

"You, my friend," Yohji hissed, "are either incredibly brave or incredibly stupid."

Yuushi grinned back at him and made a hushing motion as music began to play. As the elaborate introduction began to drift out the strategically placed speakers, Sakura left the house and began to walk towards the wedding arch. Her light blue dress drifted elegantly as she slowly approached the few spectators.

'Step, step, step, remember to smile, step, step, almost there,' she thought jittery. 'I'm at the alter, move across from Schuldig…"

The German gave her a nervous look.

The music paused for a moment before the Bridal Chorus began to flow through the garden.

"Courage," Schuldig muttered to Brad, "remember you love her."

The precog gave the German an irked look and began to try to unclench his sweaty hands.

The audience turned expectantly awaiting the appearance of the bride. As the music reached the cue Aya-chan and Ran stepped out arm in arm. The delicate embroidery on Ran's formal blue kimono glinted in the candlelight. Aya-chan, however, seemed to glow. Her white gown, sprinkled with blue embroidery and beadwork, lit up her serene face. They began their slow walk towards the alter, causing Brad's heart to pound harder with every step.

The priest gave them a gentle smile as they finally reached the alter. The music died away.

"Who is it that brings this bride to be wed," the priest asked.

Ran gave the priest a grave look. Brad's mind went into complete panic.

'He's not going to do it,' he thought frantically. 'After all this, he won't do it.'

"Her brother does."

'Oh, thank God.'

Ran gently grasped his sister's hand and placed it in Brad's. Turning, he then joined the assembled teams.

oo000oo000oo

**Villa Weiss, living room, 9:55 pm**

Schuldig walked up to Ran, a concerned expression on his face. "Just how many drinks have you had," he demanded.

Ran gave him a focused look.

"Aya brought me two…and…Brad had one," Ran paused, thinking back. "Yohji had bubbly-stuff and…Ken didn't want his bubbly…had to commandeer one from Nagi…I…what was the question?"

Schuldig sighed. "That's it," he muttered, "you're sticking to punch the rest of the night."

"Had some. Tasted funny."

On the other side of the room, Nagi, Omi and Sakura were talking animatedly.

"So you knew that Kritiker had pegged you as a new agent?" Nagi demanded.

Sakura nodded. "Yes, Manx brought it up several days ago. And Ran had mentioned something along those lines before that." She gave them an amused look. "I'm moving into the Koneko, after all," she said lightly. "I have to have some excuse for Mom. Manx told her that I'd been offered an internship in Business Administration. And that part of the deal was that I move in with everyone."

"So how long will it take you to pack?" Omi asked.

"Not long if you both help me."

"Of course we will," Nagi said in surprise. "And if we give Ran a few hours to get past his hangover, I'm sure he'll be happy to 'port your stuff over for you. You won't have to pack too much that way."

Farfarello suddenly darted through the room, several suitcases under his arms. "Everyone hang here for a minute," he called as he headed for the door. "We'll head outside in just a moment!"

Everyone glanced around the room before beginning to put down glasses and plates. Shoes returned to feet and jackets were pulled back on. Bags of rice were grabbed as they all headed outside.

Omi handed Farfarello a small bag after the Irishman finished putting the suitcases in the bed of the truck.

"Can't believe they're finally married," Yohji said in a suspiciously raspy voice. He suppressed a sniff and started to open the bag.

A deep purr suddenly broke through the night. An engine revved once, twice and a small black car suddenly shot past the Villa, headed for the road down the mountain.

"Everyone better behave while we're gone," Aya-chan called out as the Ferrari shot past the teams. "See you in a month!"

The car quickly disappeared from sight. Yohji's hands began to shake. "No, no, no," he whimpered.

Ken began to chuckle. Manx was snickering. Ran laughed outright.

"My car! They took my car! They took Flash!" Yohji wailed.

"You named your car Flash?" Ran asked in amusement. "Flash?"

_**The End**_

**_(...at least, for now)_**

oo000oo000oo

_**Stay tuned for the upcoming sequel, "Improbability Factor"**_

**_When Esset threatens Schatten's very existence, they are unprepared for a very … improbable … response._**

_For author notes and reviewer responses, see our livejournal at http//silvenstarlight.livejournal. com/ . Please visit our website at http//ladyraina . net/ (note – best viewed with Internet Explorer)._


	27. Improbability Factor

We just wanted to take this opportunity to clear up a few issues. First off, the revised chapters of "Total Mayhem" are up. We did a "replace chapter" so you don't have to worry about changing your bookmarks. We would also like to let you know that we are working on "Improbability Factor". We just need to finish building Esset (eyes Thalia). Until then, here are a few moments that we've written for IF. We thought we'd share. Enjoy!

**_NOW OFFERING UPDATE NOTIFICATIONS! SEE LIVEJOURNAL FOR DETAILS. _**

* * *

Brad opened the back door just as the doorbell began to ring. He gave the two newcomers a smug smirk. "We've been expecting you," he said in a calm voice. 

The woman smirked. "That's not possible," she said in a taunting voice. "You see, we exceed all expectations."

* * *

Schuldig's arm snapped out, snagging Sakura and pinning her in place. She was afraid of him, truly, genuinely afraid of him. Well, they couldn't have that now, could they?

* * *

Yohji grabbed Aya-chan's arm, an air of desperation surrounding him. "Where's Sakura," he asked frantically. A loud, high-pitched scream told them.

* * *

"Brad," Aya-chan said thoughtfully. "I think we should adopt Nagi."

* * *

Aya-chan seized Omi by the shoulders and pushed him towards the car. "I don't care if you don't want to go shopping," she said in an exasperated voice. "You've grown five inches. You need new clothes!"

* * *

Birman gave Ran a harsh look. "Was that a threat against Kritiker?" she demanded. 

"What if it was," Ran said coolly.

A gun appeared in Birman's hand and pointed at his head. "Then that would be considered grounds for termination," she growled.

* * *

Aya-chan stepped wearily out of the infirmary and leaned against the doorframe. "I've stopped the bleeding," she said in a tired voice. "But he's lost so much blood…" her voice trailed off for a moment and she shut her eyes. "I really don't think he's going to survive the night."

* * *

The door to Brad's room flew open and Oracle bounded out, a dangerous gleam in his eyes. "Nagi," he asked in an excited voice. "Can you move trees?"

* * *

Please review! Your input in the past has forced us to take a closer look at our story and fix things! Any observation you can make, however small, will be extremely valuable to us. We'll see you soon! 

-Ptath, Thalia and Lady Raina

PS: Improbability Factor is now up! To read it, go through our profile (Ptath). If you go through the Weiss Kreuz main page, you will need to select "Story Rating: All" or "Rating: M" to view it.

_Edited December 2, 2006._


	28. Notice to readers

Ptath appears, carrying a soap box. After setting it on the ground, she climbs up on it and produces a mega-phone.

"Loyal readers," she begins, eyes glowing and her free arm waving wildly. "I come bearing news that will bring you great joy! Harken unto me and listen most closely, for my words are of great importance!"

As Ptath continues to rave, Thalia and Lady Raina appear. Lady Raina groans and drops her head into her hands while Thalia merely sighs and begins to walk towards Ptath.

"Why did we let her buy that soap-box again?" Lady Raina asked in a pained voice as she jogged to catch-up with Thalia.

"Because she begged and begged and we saw one used to great effect on 'Boston Legal.'" Thalia replied.

"We better get her down before the readers stop reading! They'll never hear the news at this rate!" cautioned Lady Raina.

Thalia reaches into hammer space and produces a giant mallet, which she uses to smack Ptath off the soap-box.

"If you don't mind," she says dryly as she picks up the mega-phone. "We have noticed a very distinct lack of reviews from our loyal fans," she began, "fans whose input and reviews carried us through the hard times and inspired us to complete that which we started, allowing us to continue with our insanity and write yet another story. Now, that being said**, Improbability Factor** (**IF**) (the sequel to **Total Mayhem** (the story that you are currently getting a notice about)) is now in full swing as three chapters have already been posted, and after this goes up, we will immediately begin work on chapter four. So we expect to see your reviews again **VERY SOON! (OR ELSE)."**

"And now for one final bit of information: there is a companion piece to **IF. **It is entitled **One Night Out** and is based on another anime which will have no bearing on **IF** except that it borrows the character which the companion fic focuses on. It is posted here on and you can access it through Ptath's profile. It is vital that this is read as it contains key information on new characters that will be entering the Schatten mix in chapter four. So, **GO R&R."**

"We will now leave you to read in peace. We do hope you enjoy."

With that Thalia bows, pause to pick up a still unconscious Ptath, and walks away.

Things will not be pretty if she is forced to return.


End file.
